โI didnโt want to be around it. ย I didnโt want to hear the yelling, or the fighting. ย So I ran away from the badness. ย I spent my childhood at the houses of friends. ย I surrounded myself with people. ย And I became a social butterfly. ย Even when I moved to London ten years ago, I still kept my old friends around me. ย There were always so many people coming and going. ย But then we all turned thirty, and suddenly everyone was going, and not coming back again. ย Things began to fall apart for me. ย I lost my support network. ย I lost my job. ย I found myself in an abusive relationship, just like my mother had been. ย I was so angry at myself for going through the same cycle. ย But I allowed it to happen, because he was the only thing keeping me from being completely alone. ย But one day I did it. ย I finally left him. ย For a moment I had no friends, no job, no place to live, and no relationship. ย I wanted to run back home. ย But I stayed in London. ย I stayed just to teach myself that I could be ok. ย I rented a room in a house full of strangers. ย I began doing things on my own. ย I went to a music festival by myself, and ended up meeting the best friends of my life. ย I stayed single for three good years. ย I taught myself what I want and what I deserve. ย Now Iโve got a great boyfriend whoโs not insecure, whoโs not jealous, whoโs not controlling, who lets me be myself. ย And Iโve learned that Iโm independent. ย Growing up I always thought of myself as independent. ย But it was just a thought. ย I never knew. ย But now I know.โ
(London, England)