Honestly Fandom Garbage

the mystery bruises you're getting aren't from anemia or something stupid like that. they're from me. i go into your house while you're asleep and softly hit you with hammers until i am satisfied

i can understand the trials but were the tribulations really necessary

getting lots of Cat Help™️ on 995 days left

Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!

clark kent ticking the organ donor box on his drivers license automatically out of the goodness of his heart and then panicking because what if he actually dies somehow and some human gets a super heart what would even HAPPEN like he can't have his kryptonian retinas with laser vision donated to a random eight year old and so he has to awkwardly go back to the DMV to get it changed to not an organ donor but he's so embarrassed the whole time because the DMV employees will think he's a bad person that by the time he's done he has to go cry in the car

momentarily had the thought “shout out to my platonic harem” and then remembered that’s called friends

thank you so much adblockers. thank you. I love you. thank you so much

me on days when i’m in the lab doing gruesome medical experiments on human subjects

Today is the only day you can reblog this.

platonically shooting my friendshot hoping I don't get acquaintance-zoned