This is such a great meme because it points out something our hyper-visual society often forgets:
And I know we talk a lot how porn is not a replacement for sex-ed and how sex in porn is unrealistic, but i don’t think many people really consciously process just how much porn is not sex.
Let me show you what I mean. What is this?
Did you say “a horse“? Well technically it’s an image of a horse, and while that makes me sound like an annoying pedant, it’s interesting how much we conflate images with the real thing, to a point where we both subconsciously understand that you can refer to an image of a thing as “the thing“. (This experience seems to be learned rather than universal - many societies that don’t rely on visual reproductions as much as western society have very different ideas on image vs. object).
And while that’s a pretty cool image of a horse, you can’t ride it, feed it sugar cubes, or experience the constant fear of it accidentally crushing your toes. Nobody believes owning a photo of a horse is in any way similar to owning an actual horse. But then we don’t have a billion dollar horse photo industry trying to convince us of that.
Sex is a physical act, while porn captures only one or two specific dimensions of that (video/audio) which it then tries to make interesting in a way that can sort of make you forget about the other stuff that’s not there. And while liking sex usually goes together with liking porn, it is absolutely possible to like porn without liking sex (or vice versa) because porn is not sex.
It’s also important to understand that porn is an industry and that it influences how our society - an by extension, we - see both porn and sex, even if we don’t directly engage with it. We know that porn addiction often makes people loose interest in actual sex, so in a way people having physical sex is not necessarily beneficial to the porn industry. Extreme kinks are also something that is visually interesting and therefore desirable in porn, while real life sex is already a pretty intense experience on its own (no shame for anybody who practices kinks, I’m just highlighting why something that looks good in porn might not necessarily feel good irl).
Anyway, I went off rambling a bit, but I did this little mental exercise to show you why you can be ace and still like porn, and why you can dislike porn and still be allo. Now go forth and do whatever feels good to you! (as long as it’s not hurting other people ;)
yousharknotpass
snowghoul
romaincrisis
dededos
turnnoffyourmind
