auston matthews’s ass ain’t got no business being that big
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祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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@hockeysmybae98
auston matthews’s ass ain’t got no business being that big

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Anybody notice where Jess is standing in this picture?
I’ve commented tangentially on this before, but I want to point it out very directly. First, think about the home in which Jess grew up…the one in which he “[didn’t] like any of the guys” his mom dated, but, as he put it, “She r e a l l y doesn’t care what I think. I’ve got 19 years of proof to back me up.” Want a glimpse of those years?
He watches her in his peripheral vision. She’s on the telephone, anxiety mounting. He knows before asking who was on the phone, and even if she doesn’t say so, he can tell that HE is on his way, and she’s scared, even though she doesn’t want to show it. BEFORE HE GETS HERE, YOU SHOULD MAKE YOURSELF SCARCE. YOU KNOW HOW HE GETS. I WANT TO AVOID A FIGHT. But there’s no way he’s leaving her to face him alone. When h e gets there, keep things light and casual. …Nope… H E ’ S MAD. Change of tactic. Just keep talking–keep h i s eyes on YOU–draw h i s fire while you casually step in front of her…between them– …That’s right, buddy, I’m your target, over here, if you’re gonna hit somebody it’s me, if you’re going to yell and scream at somebody, I’m right here, I caused all of this trouble, anything you don’t like about this situation? ALL ME.
Family gathering.
MOOOOOM, AUNT CAROL IS HEEEEEERE
Aunt Carol is fucking ripped.
reblog if you love aunt carol
This photo, man. It’s magical.
HOLY PB & J THERE’S MORE!!!
“Ma sweet Flower, wouldja do me the very great honor of accepting-”
“Hey, whoa now, Young Elvis, I was here first.”
“Don’ be stepping on my blue suede shoes, Old Elvis.”
Fleury - *all blushes and smiles*

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Mentally dating every NHL player I have a crush on
boiii if this ain’t me
“why do you overanalyze text messages” to my credit i overanalyze everything, always, because i love feeling like i’m suffocating and everyone hates me, constantly, so at least there’s… consistency
nsfw blurb - freddie andersen
Author’s Note: no one asked but here’s a blurb about freddie (with some input from @mystupidlovesongs)
Seguir leyendo
if i see anyone saying anything negative about andre burakovsky bravely saying, (despite the toxic masculine bullshit that permeates sports and the stigma surrounding mental health that fucking permeates society,) that he was going to see a sports psychologist this summer to work through some shit and take care of his mental health & emotional well-being, i will hunt u the fuck down with a hockey stick, where i will then proceed to shove it so far up your ass you’ll be choking up splinters.

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there’s literally no point in teaching girls to be body positive if you only use men’s opinions for validation like “boys like girls with curves” nah get that the fuck out of here
It’s important that you keep your feelings and your self worth in different places because when feelings get hurt it shouldn’t change how you view yourself.
shoutout to the jets fans clapping for vegas
our assistant gm is better than all of your team’s management
OKAY i’m sorry to hijack this post but like I NEED TO TALK ABOUT RICH CLUNE. because RICH CLUNE IS THE BEST. rich clune means SO MUCH TO ME, LIL OFGEO IN HER STUDIO APARTMENT, NOT LIVING HER DREAM LIFE THE WAY THAT RICH CLUNE WANTS HER TO.
here’s some stuff about rich clune:
he’s sober
he tries really hard, always, at everything
he’s not having any of your bullshit, not even if you’re his friend–he like grew up idolizing sean avery but is also constantly like “lol just so we’re clear sean’s the worst don’t ever be like sean, everybody”
one time he called someone who was trolling him on twitter and they had an incredibly pleasant conversation in which rich clune was like “hey buddy it’s okay, you’ve apologized, just don’t do that again” and the guy was like “wow man yeah i’m sorry thanks” (that links to a VIDEO if you wanna watch it)
he understands that james neal needs to be constantly, lovingly mocked in order to keep him from turning into the worst version on himself
he’s very aware of his job as an agitator in the league but he also LOVES SAFETY!! SAFETY FIRST!!!: “No one wants to see anyone get their head taken off with a blind-side check or a stick to the face. If a guy is down or knocked out in a fight, no one wants to see anyone take an extra shot. At the end of the day, we play each other to the max … but you can’t cross the line as far as damaging someone’s brain or body with a dirty move.” (x)
he’s a BIG DUMB GOOBER:
anyway in conclusion RICH CLUNE U BEAUTIFUL WEIRDO KEEP DOING U, BUDDY.
I would like to add that he once posted this tweet, which has *literally* saved my life
And this truth bomb, which hurts, but is real
Also his snapchat is hilarious.
The guy is honestly amazing, a true gem.

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pt.2/2
i present to you, famous NHL players in their junior/prospect team league. pt.½