didn’t even read all that I just kno it’s funny :>

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@hiddenmastamister
didn’t even read all that I just kno it’s funny :>

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Damn
[Image description:
Cropped image of medieval-stylized printed text, focused on a line which reads: “This wenche thikke”
/end image description]
Thank you for adding this image description! Just wanted to clarify that it’s not stylised, but actual Middle English. The text is from The Canterbury Tales.
Okay, had to track it down. It’s from the Reeve’s Tale, and it’s a description of a 20yo young woman:
This wenche thikke and wel y-growen was, With camuse nose and yën greye as glas; With buttokes brode and brestes rounde and hye, But right fair was hir heer, I wol nat lye.
In modern English (had to look up “camuse”, so that’s as good as my source, but I know the rest)
This wench was thick and well-grown With a pug nose and eyes grey as glass; With buttocks broad and breasts round and high, But right fair was her hair, I will not lie.
The fact that Chaucer had “big butt” and “I will not lie” within two lines of each other is causing me disproportionate amusement. Also the fact that “this wenche thikke” works equally well in Middle English and in modern slang.
I love HIMMMMMM
puki did you kill duolingo?????
I didn't have to. That dumbfuck Owl never had a soul worth living to begin with.

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Did ypu just never deactivate are you alive
i wont die until someone kills me
I work cybersecurity, this is like half my job.
the whole vaccine deal tbh
antidepressants
reynard the fox as a clergyman, with birds in his cowl
in the book of hours of mary of burgundy, flanders, ca. 1470
source: Vienna, ÖBN, Cod. 1857, fol. 59v
bro I am Dogwater_AP add me omg
I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me
you are making this so difficult

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boulin.
???
i think the world would be a happier place if we were all permanently stoned
nah bro, m’fokin pissed and i ain’t even mad, really but yea stoned or naw we can still make ourselves mad lmao though u probably rite it’d be a lil happier for a minute …then ppl just be stoned and mad
I just found out VLC media player lets you do this????
It works in motion too!! Took me half an hour asdgfsadfghas

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do you think a 22 yr old is too young for a 24 yr old?
i mainly fuck divorced fathers so i wouldn't know too much about that.. but yeah i think they should both be put to death
2 yrs difference and y’all over th’age of 21, what a dumbass question
Saw beams of light in the sky. Investigating further.
would blaze but i’m broke