Hic Est Baculum Meum

Round 5 match 1: [ɸ] v [β] v [ɬ]

[ɸ]

Voiceless bilabial fricative

[β]

Voiced bilabial fricative

[ɬ]

Voiceless Alveolar Lateral Fricative

“And we loved it, we were all having a great time, but then he saw my sister and I, and he just got this - this look in his eyes, and then-”

She hesitated, worrying the coarse material between her fingers. “Things got pretty bad after that,” she muttered. “I know it’s silly, but I try to keep - her - comfortable. We don’t know if she can still hear us, or see us, or if she’s even still in here, but I like to think she is. I talk to her when I can, I leave music on when I’m out of the house. I tried to convince my parents to bring her with us when we went to Disneyland, but they didn’t - didn’t really take that well.”

feminist

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my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm

a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force

daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed

always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't

7. You can fold my daughter through any two points.

10. When two or more daughters are offered for a phenomenon, the simplest daughter is preferable.

11. Any sufficiently advanced daughter is indistinguishable from magic.

12. Without a clear indicator of intent, it is utterly impossible to parody my daughter without someone mistaking it for the genuine article.

15. You do not talk about my daughter

20. Terms and conditions may apply to my daughter

21. Do not remove the tag from my daughter under penalty of law

22. The limit of willing suspension of disbelief for my daughter is directly proportional to how cool her action is