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@herdofbears
You should never forget literally the best line in all of video games
Too many people in the reblogs saying this has to be fake. I need you to know this is absolutely 100% real and in the game and it’s not even the craziest thing in Metal Gear Solid 2
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I think polyamory should be used to make romance subplots even more convoluted, actually. Sure, it could theoretically solve a love triangle- but it could also make things infinitely more chaotic and that's way better.
Some ideas:
The protagonist thinks they're in a harem anime, but it turns out all the love interests are trying to recruit them into the same polycule but are being bizarrely competitive about who can get the protag to go on a date first.
Two members of the polycule get married, and nobody is quite sure how to tell the groom that they caught the bride sleeping around. (bonus points if he is actually mad about it, but for stupid reasons.)
A guy dates a pair of identical twins. Hijinks ensue.
The members of the polycule all panic because they all bought the same damn thing for Jenny's birthday, and have to come up with a new plan at the last minute.
A woman has to decide which of her boyfriends she wants to legally marry- because both of them have the most obnoxious families imaginable and they want to make a Thing out of it. (could end with the boyfriends marrying each other for maximum chaos)
A superhero, desperate to keep their secret identity safe, decides to date the woman of their dreams in both identities, and is struggling to keep it all straight. (bonus points if she knew all along, and was using her supervillain persona to trip them up.)
A man mistakenly scheduled two dates on the same day, and has to figure out a way to attend them both in rapid succession.
An evil twin does the classic twin switch, and has to navigate her way around her sister's increasingly confusing love life.
The most important clue in a murder mystery was the love letter the victim was about to send to "my beloved girlfriend". One of the many girlfriends clearly killed the man, but which?
when i was a tiny baby queer (aka a 24-year-old), i went to my first pride festival probably three months after i kicked ex-gay therapy to the curb and came out to my parents. being the people they are, my parents came with me. they weren’t really sure about this whole gay thing, but they loved me and wanted me to be safe and happy and wanted to be involved in what was important to me, so they came along. (i also think my mother still might have thought i might get drugged or murdered or beaten by a protester of which there were plenty.)
anyway i wanted a memento of my first pride, you know, and this one vendor was selling keyrings, and i liked it, so i bought one. do you remember those italian charm bracelets that were all the rage like 10-15 years ago? it was a keychain like that, and it had a rainbow rooster, a rainbow cat, and then just a rainbow, and so I bought it.
i run into my mom a couple of vendors over and she goes oh you bought something? what’d you get? so i showed her, and i was like, “I’m not sure why it’s a rooster and a cat. Seems kind of random. But I liked the rainbows.”
and my mom, who was some form of minister’s wife for most of my childhood and teenagerhood, stares at me like she thinks i’m joking.
“What?” i say.
“…it’s a cock and a pussy, Jules,” she says flatly, and that is the story of how i died at the age of 24 while attending my first pride festival.
I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.
I help my younger sibling vend at Pride and we sell buttons. There’s a pair that are “I ❤ 🐓” and “I ❤️ 🐈”. One day, a middle aged woman comes up to our booth and gets very excited about the “I ❤️ 🐓” pin, which we gladly sell to her. 15 minutes later, she returns, shamefaced and says, “oh my god, I the world’s dumbest lesbian, I just- I have nine chickens.”
We gave her a complimentary pussy pin on the house.
see when people try and nitpick me because i call my dog "my dog" when it's technically "the family dog".......well first of all i still call my brother "my brother" and not "the family boy". although maybe that should change. second of all sorry i'm still thinking about the family boy. btw i fell asleep while making this post last night and i think you can tell
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Just seen a bathroom sign that says "Femmes". Unsure if this is woke or not.
Update: the mens room says Hommes. This seafood restaurant is safe from the "woke mob" but not from the dastardly Frenchman
This like when the costco founder said he'd kill the cfo if he tried to raise the price of the hot dog
"Sorry I have a boyfriend" is of course a time-tested and reasonably reliable no-fault rejection strategy. But what many tacticians may not realize is it has an even more powerful counterpart, the preemptive boyfriend name-drop. This is when a conversation with a stranger veers into high-alert territory and you make up a guy named Raphael (my boyfriend) who you mention due to his extremely-relevant interest in the current topic of conversation.
Raphael is a powerful tactical piece here due to his simultaneous love or hatred of every single topic ever, due to he's not real.
One of my favorite things is modern adaptations that leave people with the same careers they had in the original material, because unless you’re a cop or a doctor that practically never happens.
Irene Adler’s an opera singer. We still have those! They don’t have the same subtext exactly, but nothing is going to because we aren’t the Victorians. She could continue to be an opera singer. I have never seen this happen.
Jonathan Harker can still be in real estate. That’s a job people have. A modern story that still involves Dracula contacting his firm to help him purchase property sounds amazing actually.
A modern adaptation of Dracula where you keep seeing Jonathan Harker’s face on bus stop bench ads for his realtor office.
#“This client doesn’t seem to exist online; a bit strange. But he’s elderly so it’s not that unusual” -Jonathan about to make a mistake – @capslockdoesntexpressmyjoy
I was about to joke about Quincey Morris still being a cowboy, but then it occurred to me that he’s not actually a cowboy in the source material, is he? He’s the wealthy heir of a Texas ranch-owning family who just acts like an Old West cowboy. If anything, that’s even more plausible today than it was in 1897.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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every so often i have to rewatch this clip because rupaul put the fear of god in jimmy fallon
NO NO NO NO NOT MY PATIENT NOT MY PATIENT
Did you guys know that Elon Musk's twitter now wants to also be a streaming media platform and that their first show is going to be an AI looking conservative family guy ripoff
Cathartic news: there are no sincere positive comments whatsoever. Not even from the target right wing audience. X even tries to algorithmically prioritize the nicest comments and just did not have any to work with.
Imagine making a product so bad even anti-wokeness can't make conservatives shill for it
i like not knowing how many ace attorney games there actually are because whenever i think i have it right fans suddenly rejoice that capcom finally announced an english release for a years-old spinoff no one else has ever heard of about a guy called some shit like Geoff deKiller
This post is actually so much better than you intended it to be because the 13-year-old spinoff getting its English release is agreed to be the best in the franchise by everyone who has the correct opinion, and it features the classic Ace Attorney 2 character named deKiller in 3 out of its 5 cases.
are you fucking serious.
A little story about ghosts, and roommates, and getting to know each other.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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You can only reblog this today! Next time Thursday 20 will follow Wednesday 19 will be in 2439!
there's literally gonna be a Wednesday the 19th next February
