I came across an article from NPR the other day suggesting that unless something changes, ONE-THIRD of museums in the entire country (a loose term that includes certain places like aquariums as well) could be dead before the end of the year (source). A third! Can you even imagine the incalculable loss? And it goes so far beyond the services museums generally provide to the public, like field trips or a place to go on the weekends – not that those aren’t important. But museums do so much more than that. If these places die, where do their collections go? Often there’s no one else who can take them in, and as someone who has spent a significant amount of time in the bellies of museum collections, most people have no idea how many specimens or artifacts would become homeless and in danger of being lost forever. In the case of zoos and aquariums, what happens to their animals? Another friend of mine mentioned on Facebook the other day that the Aquarium of the Pacific is not only in dire need right now, but that a person they know who works with them has said that if they close, they’ll have to euthanize a significant number of their animals. And for the places that do survive, they won’t be unchanged. The science museum I used to work for isn’t in danger of permanently closing – yet – but still had make the incredibly difficult call to do a 39% reduction in staff positions, meaning that even when they reopen, the jobs that I and over a hundred and fifty people held before the pandemic – educating, running programs, engaging with visitors on an extra personal level – won’t exist anymore. Another friend of mine doing a museum studies degree has said that even the Smithsonian (the SMITHSONIAN) had to make a similar call and many of her friends doing work there are now jobless.

Your local museum isn’t getting help from the government. Museums, zoos, and aquariums have had to beg desperately for stimulus money that hasn’t manifested. These are non-profits, that rely on revenue from visitors and memberships for the most part, and as they are responsibly staying closed for everyone’s safety, they aren’t getting visitors. Without some form of help, they are going to drop off the face of the planet, or appear at the other end of this as gutted shells of their former selves. 

If you want to help, you have two options: get money into the hands of these places directly, or put pressure on your representatives to offer museums and other institutions like them some kind of federal stimulus money. If you can afford it, this is a great time to get a membership to a place you love – many of them are even offering special online programming for members, so it’s more than just a donation. Or you could make a donation, if that’s a more practical amount for you to spend, because at this point anything helps. And if you can’t do that (or even if you can), yell at your senators and representatives to do something. Many places even are offering guidelines for the sorts of things to talk about, like this script from the Monterey Bay Aquarium (although repetitive scripts are less likely to have an impact than individual e-mails, something is still better than nothing, and you could even read over it to figure out how to formulate your own message).

Those needles have barbs that catch and tangle the fibers of the roving (the term for that loose wool) together. The more you stab it the more tightly-packed and the more firm the object becomes. It takes a lot of little stabs to smooth out the texture on the surface and is best done with a single fine gauge needle.

Fun fact: the longer you use a felting needle the sharper it becomes, as the wool polishes the point.

YAS GO GIRL ASTRID!

It wouldn’t do much during fights, where each round is choreographed in 6 second intervals and leave no real room for impulse, but in non-combat/social situations, it would be hilarious.

The characters all have a stat 1-10, 1 being ‘No Filter’ and 10 being ‘I Would Never.’ At any time, the DM can interject “make an Impulse Save,” and players would have to roll a D20 and add your stat to it–and I’m fudging with numbers here, but: anything above a 20 is a Save where nothing happens. Anything between 20 and 10, your DM says “You’re tempted to… x.” Anything below a 10 is an automatic fail.

DM: You walk into the fancy party. There are dignitaries, a giant Throne at the center, and a buffet to the side. And, heck with it. Everyone make an Impulse Save. 1: I got a 27. DM: You’re free to mingle. 2: I got an 18? DM: You’re tempted to try to sit on the throne. You start wandering that direction. 3: …I rolled a Nat 1. DM: You run over and stick your head in the chocolate fountain.

Characters can have a set number of rerolls to keep things from spiraling out of their control. They can also change the DM’s assessment if they feel it’s out of character; if #3 above was a thief, it might be more likely they’d klepto the first shiny thing they saw rather than become suddenly obsessed with the buffet. Players can also override the DM by the 3-second rule: if you can shout a setting-appropriate impulsive action before the DM does, that becomes your new action. Sometimes this is in the Player’s benefit. Sometimes this is the Player shooting themselves in the foot.

DM: You’re talking to a pretty Elf. She smiles at you. 1: My Character reciprocates. DM: Oh, good. Roll an impulse check, then. 1: …oh no. uh. okay, oh no– DM: Wha’d you get 1: I GOT A 4 DM: Alright, so you lean in and– 1: I DROP MY TROUSERS DM: –Okay, I was going to have you kiss her, but sure, you can drop your pants, that works too. 1: GODDAMN IT

Characters like Priests, Monks, or Paladins probably have a high Impulse Control after years of training, and would be unlikely to, say, throw a lemon pie in the King’s face. But since having a stat of 9 almost guarantees you will never fail an Impulse check…

To make things interesting, Characters with a high Impulse stat–7 or above–have to make Dignity checks. Anything this character attempts that is silly, rambunctious, or requires snap decision making, has to first make a Dignity check. It works the opposite as an Impulse Save. Anything below 15 is a go. Anything between a 15 and 20 is “You’d love to, but…” and anything above a 20 is an immediate “Nope.” No, you can’t wear that guard’s disguise, it’s frilly. No, you can’t shout across the market to warn your friend about an illusion, you’ll look crazy. No, there’s no way in hell you’re gonna be The Distraction.

Life-Or-Death circumstances can serve as bonuses to your Dignity check, knocking off a few extra points in the name of saving someone’s life. Players can also force their characters to do the undignified action anyway, to allow for free will into the plot, but any bending of these rules will cause a small amount of Stun or Physical damage to the Character in question, plus surefire humiliation later.

If you can help, my PayPal email is [email protected] and my Venmo is @pilgrimkitty

The best thing about working from home