Chloe Price is my patron saint

i'm such a fan of calling 2 guys trying to kill each other their "divorce arc"

men will literally declare each other mortal enemies and make their category 5 relationship drama everyone's problem instead of going to couple's therapy

In an effort to avoid supporting megacorporations, I shall now be posing questions directly to tumblr that I would otherwise have googled.

If Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, why it creamy?

Because it's also evil

Yup! It’s anything that takes up space, has mass, and is goth.

You meet god

Whole, in one gulp.

Father of the Muffin Boy

Car's haunted

Slam into a priest in a crosswalk going at least forty miles an hour

into the sky, where it turns into stars

priest has to pay for medical bills related to haunted car crashing into him

....Ah

seeing people worshipping pdf like do you even know epub.. you're in plato's cave and I'm begging you to see the light

Love her, alt!Chloe deserved more than to be a sexless prop to guilt the player with. Where’s my option to kiss alt!Chloe Dontnod?

rage and tenderness existing simultaneously in the same body

The vampire equivalent of the “accidentally ate the fake fruit” faux pas.

can’t wait until people start claiming to be shadowbanned on this site and we collectively get to inform them that there’s no algorithm and their posts just suck

There absolutely is shadow banning.

It really is real, I had to write to the staff to get un-shadow banned.

See this complete incompetence is why I'm on this site

It's not Tumblr if it's not broken

denying yourself enjoyment of things because you don't want to be 'cringe' is the most cringe thing you can do actually. like what are you, catholic?

like, you're going to refuse to engage with anything that feeds your emotions with rich and delicious new sensations in case you fall to the temptation of unironically having fun? okay john harvey kellogg jr.