Can i download the new update for my brain yet?

people with uteri are never gonna have a perfectly flat stomach. they’re always gonna have a little pouch, because that’s where we keep our bees.

once a month the moon angers the bees

NOT THE BEES

bees?

youre angle or youre devil

they are both angles how dare you

*seductively flips leg hair* 

this is like so funny but terrifying¿ im laughing partially out of fear

I’m laughing entirely out of fear

Now that smartphone are increasingly becoming waterproof, it won’t be long before we can start pushing people into pools again

THIS COMPILATION IS ART

protect her

:(

:(

why cant we eat lava what the fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you can eat lava actually! but only once

When he says “really” ;’)

Never leave this un-reblogged

What a dear human being he is. 

OMG YAY!

the most wholesome post to ever come out of this wretched site. love it

When you hear a new song on the radio and you’re desperately trying to pick a notable phrase so you can google it later

The red pointed “hat” on a gnomes head is actually a venoumous stinger

A car where the seat is the gas pedal