the way Shane is staring

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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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we're not kids anymore.
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

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@handmadeblossoms
the way Shane is staring

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The thing about the Cottage is that yes they are making love. Yes they are saying the most emotionally vulnerable shit that they have ever said to another living person. Yes they are going at it missionary style bathed in moonlight and calling each other baby about it.
They are also, crucially, having the filthiest and nastiest sex that two guys in their twenties with an extremely willing monogamous partner can think up. Things are WILD. They are Yes And'ing each other in ways that they are legit going to have to process by sitting quietly alone in a room for an entire day at some point in the future.
They're going at it raw, of course. Ilya is spitting in his mouth and making Shane thank him for the privilege, then calling him a slut when he does. Shane is letting Ilya chase him through the woods. He's wrapping Ilya's fingers around his neck and begging while Ilya tightens his grip. Ilya decides at one point that if Shane can't come on his cock alone then he doesn't get to come. Shane doesn't receive oral a single time at the Cottage without having to swallow his own cum. Ilya walks around with a piece of gauze on his forearm because Shane bit him and drew blood. Ilya fucks Shane with his nose way up inside Shane's armpit the entire time, huffing and licking. Ilya comes on Shane's face in the shower and Shane is so far down and loves the feeling of being marked so much that he asks Ilya to piss on him. Shane is never more than two minutes away from having Ilya's tongue or dick in one of his holes, no warning given aside from a command to spread his legs or get on his knees.
It's a fucking tour de force of debauchery. And this, too, is lovemaking.
this is real though, right?
I love the idea of Shane being not just good at hockey but good at all sports, to the point where it fascinates and infuriates the other Centaurs
Because what do you mean they went to the batting cages for some silly fun to watch everyone flail at an unfamiliar sport, only for Shane to need three practice swings before figuring out the force and timing needed to start hitting every single pitch? What do you mean he sets the course record at the mini golf place they have the Pike twins birthday at? What do you mean he learned how to play cricket over a long weekend in the UK? What do you MEAN your Canadian ass that grew up on a calm, tiny lake went to visit Rose in LA and just learned to surf from âsome guyâ one of the days she was busy??
Shane doesnât get why they all think itâs so crazy. Heâs a professional athlete, heâs good at full body and mind control as well as adaptability and hand-eye coordination, and heâs so used to being the best in the world at hockey that he views being mundanely good at anything else as barely noticeable. He argues with Troy over whether he counts as being good at basketball just because he killed them all at the basketball shooting game at a Dave and Busterâs
They all start making bets to see who can find a sport Hollander isnât good at. Harris is convinced heâll win with figure skating because Shaneâs muscle memory will want to work against him with a technique thatâs so similar but also so different, only for Shane to come out of an afternoon learning from his old friend who was at the Olympics with the ability to do simple jumps and spins and is insisting the whole team learn so they can incorporate it into plays. Harris is not allowed to make suggestions after that
Ilya just sits back and lustily watches his husband destroy their friends at volley ball, wrestling, tennis, broom ball, and ultimate frisbee. Shane participates in an all pro athlete Ninja Warrior event to raise money for charity and Ilya canât watch the clips of Shane flying through the course like a bat out of hell unless he is able to fuck Shane immediately after it ends
imagine being on twitter debating dumb shit right now when you could be talking about cock on tumblr

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SHANE AND ILYA in HEATED RIVALRY ⤠1.01, âRookiesâ
who knows what we might have in common?
Heated Rivalry S1 (2025)
i really love when ilya does a little double kiss on shane so he can pull back after the first one to see how shane has basically disappeared into it like eyes closed mouth open holding perfectly still just waiting for it because he knows ilya will give it to him like YAY
i resent everyone asserting shane "obviously" got autism from his dad like yuna doesn't share a hockey special interest with shane. please. she could barely focus on her son's boyfriend saying he'd happily be traded to another team to be near her son bc she was too caught up in thinking about hockey. guys please.
i see yuna getting up constantly from the table with shane and ilya and i see a woman who's clearly not comfortable with displays of emotional vulnerability. i see yuna leave the room as a signal that she's maybe not always had the space to have emotional reactions. i see yuna being confronted with a problem she sees as 'sad' (shane and ilya planning to hide until retirement) and immediately trying to logistically problem solve instead of emotionally reflecting. i see a woman who shares a special interest with her son. your honour, that's a high masking, high achieving autistic woman with a son who takes directly after her.

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Russell T Davies having the Doctor regenerate into Billie Piper hoping this would resurrect interest in the show, only for the twist to be mocked to hell and back by everyone & make both fans and the general public turn on it even harder
Well you see, Jodie Whittaker regenerated into a new Doctor who happened to look like David Tennant who then split by mitosis into himself and Ncuti Gatwa. Gatwa then left the show and the original plan was to leave his regeneration open ended but instead they rewrote it last minute, reshooting half the finale in order to facilitate his regeneration into Billie Piper, who was intended to be another temp Doctor for a special or two, which RTD committed to despite the likelihood another writer would have to reckon with that. To do this they not only cut out the original story arc, but scenes featuring Carole Ann Ford as Susan, which given she is 85 & the show is now on hiatus means her reappearance will likely go unresolved forever. This masterful RTD gambit secured Doctor Who a long term hiatus and his termination
project hail mary is a touching and poignant film that leaves you asking questions about humanity like, "wow what if all mainstream media was genuinely good" and "what if book adaptions actually gave a shit about the book in question" and "what if studios hired actors that could actually act, and then let them get a lil wacky with it"
#Donât forget âwhat if puppetry was treated as a serious artformâ (via @specialagentartemis)
Hannah Montana is fucked up because its entire POINT as a show is that children should be protected from fame and exploitation, but it stars a REAL little girl that's being exploited. Nearly every episode carries the looming threat of Miley being outed as Hannah and losing her peaceful teenage life to the ravages of fame. Her father in the show (played by her own father in real life) wisely protected her from the trauma of fame by making her wear a disguise and live a rather quiet, interview-free life. Meanwhile the REAL Billy Ray Cyrus sold his daughter to Disney Channel when she was 11 and forced her to read dialogue about how terrible it would be to face the public eye. Like... Jesus, dude. The fictional Robby Ray is 10x the father, and it's not even close. (It's also IMMENSELY funny that her dad doesn't use his real name in the show, while she does. Almost like he wanted a bit of a disconnect between his identity and his character. Something Miley didn't get.)
Hyperrealistic simulacrum of a good father
insp.
Heated Rivalry (2025)
Shane & his parents // Ilya & his parents Heated Rivalry, S01E01
Can we talk about how both David and Grigori are on the right side of the frame, Yuna is to the left of Shane- but to the left of Ilya is just a sharp drop.

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Okay justice for Ilya Rozanov, a man who notably managed his entire families finances and his dementia-having fathers caretaking since he was literally a teenager, while also essentially raising himself to be an elite, generational athlete by himself.
like what is this âIlya needs the threat of a sex ban to pick up his socksâ slander or this âIlya has terrible financial literacyâ misinformation or this âIlya only eats junk food and needs to be forced to eat his veggiesâ tomfoolery
i like being a lesbian and all, but holy shit, men are so cool. i hope all men reading this have a wonderful day.
i like being gay and all, but holy shit, women are so cool!!!! i hope all women reading this have a wonderful day as well!!!!!!!!!
[image description: the epic handshake meme. one arm is labelled gay people and the other is labelled lesbians. in the middle it says "fuck yeah bro". end id]
hey guys, quick reminder! this post is about uplifting other people!!! tags like 'ugh, but men are gross lol' or 'op has never met a man' are not welcome and will recieve an insta block! men are cool! women are cool! thank you for coming to my fucking ted talk! :-)