Don't prod the beach rubble.

just became aware of the notion that feelings are more like new email notifications dont turn them off probably but u dont have to click thru like some are just sales

I feel for everyone who isn’t having the time of their fucking lives with The Vampire Lestat. Every week I clap and cheer for the antics of the world’s saddest buzzword-laden bisexual crash-out diva and his crew of the least healed men to ever grace the small screen. The songs are cringe delightfully camp, the wigs are a nightmare, I’m living my best life, I’m loving every second. Why the fuck would you have a blood shower in your tour bus. The onscreen mother-son incest is only like the third wildest thing happening in any given episode. It’s insane. I never want it to end

Mitch McConnell has been sent to a nice farm out in the country where there's lots of open space to run around and lots of other senators for him to play with

the worst part of the fandom life cycle is when people are like “everyone keeps saying [thing that happens in canon or is strongly supported by canon traits and actions of the characters in the text], but ACTUALLY [thing that is the complete opposite and has no textual basis] is the real canon.” But you MUST persevere. Real character understanders will receive their reward in the divine for their steadfastness.

"omg i LOVE it when love between characters is so strong it overrides the boundaries of flesh and selfhood, merging them into some sort of (un)holy chimera" — person who's uncomfortable with the idea of permanently sharing a bedroom with someone else

When Shane Hollander AND Sidney Crosby exist in a fic together it’s like no. They absorbed each other in the womb. We only get one per universe.

in a way john watson is a fantasy (what if you had this brilliant enigmatic friend and what if he liked you in particular and what if he offered you the excitement of youth and adventures and a way out of boring society life and all without having to actually give up your status as a gentleman so you could have the best of both worlds) and in a way sherlock holmes is a fantasy (what if someone never got tired of you despite your various strange habits and mood swings and instead of simply tolerating you they genuinely liked you and what if you didn’t have to live alone forever and what if you never had to give up doing the things you love) and of course there’s the most fantastical part of it all (what if you could afford london housing prices)

Saying "this has been a topic of extensive discussion, you're just 21" isn't a personal attack, you're just 21.

the thing about sidgeno is that it's the quintessential love story where somehow the laws of geography, international law, language and sports management all individualy and simultaneously worked together to make sure two people could meet and become fundamental parts of each other's lives. the thing about sidnate is that nathan mackinnon is living a kind of psychosexual horror drama previously unknown to mankind.

the thing about sidclaude is that sidney crosby and claude giroux tried to kill each other for real.

ok i thought of several more of these. sidovi is like a pr marriage, but the marriage is actually a rivalry to sell more season tickets. sidjack is like a lifetime movie where a small-city girl leaves to new york (actually pittsburgh, pa) to follow her dream job but comes back to her hometown in the christmas season and sees her childhood sweetheart again. sidmario is if you wanted to fuck your highschool teacher. sidmack is if your highschool student wanted to fuck you. sidgenoanna is like if a married couple wanted you to be their purse dog. also, you might have birthed their son. sidkris is a nerd girl and a bad boy, also the bad boy has great hair and is french-canadian. sidflower is if your wife died tragically, or a orpheus/eurydice thing, and your wife/eurydice is also french-canadian. sid x ek is like if you wanted to fuck the pool boy. anyway, the point is if you've stood beside sidney crosby for more than five minutes there's an ao3 tag for you two.

Has someone made a post yet talking about how Hollanov probably secretly believe that no one has ever been in love like them. Their love is special and different and no one has ever felt as deeply about another person as the two of them. Whenever people find out that they were in situationship hell for 7 years and are shocked, they both, but Shane especially, feel smug as hell because they had the fortitude to hang in there and now they are the most in love with the hottest man alive. They're not just winning, they're beating everyone else at overcoming obstacles to their love.

Fighting for my life in margaritaville