XIII. Death (Reversed)

they’re everywhere now, they don’t even look different anymore, how are we supposed to tell, they’re blending in, they’re infiltrating, they used to stay in their own streets, at least that was honest

we can’t lend money, that’s usury, that’s forbidden, let them do it, it’s our money anyway, they’re just holding it for us, why are they so good at it, why are all bankers jews, it’s suspicious how successful they are at the only thing we allowed them to do

they must convert, that’s the only way to belong, take our names, our faith, our god (what do you mean our god was jewish), our customs, become like us or else, those new christians aren’t real christians, they’re secretly practicing, their blood is still jewish you can't change blood, they’re hiding something, we need an inquisition to see what’s in their hearts

entertainment isn’t serious work, it isn’t respectable, it isn’t properly christian, it’s nonsense, let them make their silly films, why are they controlling what we watch, why is every agent jewish, i don't like them but they make me good money so what the hell, i don't understand that funny language with the shtick and the plotz, walt disney was right

they’re poor, they crowd the cities, they’re a burden, and they’re rich, they run the banks, they’re sickly and weak and parasitic, they’re powerful and dangerous, don't mix with any of them

they’re not loyal to anyone but themselves, they’re not patriotic, they’re not doing their share, they want to what? serve in the army? can we trust them, whose side are they really on

she can't be she's blonde, he can't be he's black, they're privileged whites, they're not white, every people has the right to self-determine their identity but theirs is fake, they’re impostors, they’re khazars, so what if they're atheists they're still jewish, they're godless people, they're too religious

we cannot let them publish, they cannot print, they cannot study in our universities, their books are dangerous, what is this language, we must burn their texts, they want what, emancipation, fine they should teach they’re cheap labour, why are they teaching our children, why are they in the sciences, why are they winning all the prizes, they’re uncultured, why do they own so much art, we must confiscate it, it’s our art not theirs, felix mendelssohn? pissarro? really? emma lazarus? Oh, kafka?? You don’t say, he doesn’t read like a jew 

they’re the ones really behind socialism, behind marxism, marx was a jew by the way did you know that, he hated jews he knew what’s right, they want a world without bloodlines because their bloodline is rotten, they want a world where it’s ok to be a jew, where being born different doesn’t mark you forever, they’re behind the revolution, they’re dismantling society, they’re enemies of the state, they’re destroying tradition, they’re taking control of our government

expel them (keep their money, though), purify the kingdom, sanctify the soil, they're vermin, let them scatter, they’re nomadic, they don’t belong anywhere, what is with The Wandering Jew and their Fiddlers on the Roof and their super-heroes, nobody wants them, there must be a reason nobody wants them, they had it coming didn’t they, i heard they make their strange bread from children’s blood, why are they coming here, what do they expect, charity, where's all that money they had, they made them leave it behind when the expelled them, good, they probably stole it anyway

fine, they can stay, but it will cost them, temporary permits, refugee certificates, protection for a fee, they’re useful, they have cousins in america, they have family friends in paris, maybe they can hook me up, no i don’t know any, i met one at work once, we don’t have many of (((them))) here, it’s not that kind of place 

no, this isn’t a good time, close the gates, we’re good christians of course but they’re not, what even are they with their weird little hats, why are they praying like that, give us your tired, your poor, your huddles masses, we must accept refugees, a society that doesn't is a sick society, except for the jews, we don't want more jews, revoke the charters, we're over-crowded

we’re better than them, they think we owe them something because of the holocaust, it's been decades get over it, they’re obligated to be better than all of us, what do you mean they think they’re better than us, what is this word “goyim”, what did you call me, they should go back where they came from, i don't know where, whatever, it's not my problem, i'm only asking questions man, i just notice these things

(anne frank!!)

So, as it’s roughly explained, the state alchemist program is a kind of “recruit potential human sacrifices” mechanism, with a side-order of “brute strength for the army”. But basically, the state alchemist title is mostly about being a researcher–given people like Shou Tucker exist, and given that the only requirement to stay a state alchemist is to submit a yearly report of your research that says “look I’m still being a useful scientist”.

So far, so far this is sensible, yeah? Father and the delightful children from down the lane are running a recruitment program for potential human sacrifices. So sure–butter them up! Give them lots of money, get them buddy-buddy with the government, and give them endless resources for research. It’s be pretty easy to trick a state alchemist in that position to open the portal if Sugar DaddyBradley is nudging them to do it.

And I’m still willing to go with this logic for the whole “draft the state alchemists into war” move. They make it pretty clear that was something of a last-ditch effort. And the blood transmutation circle around Amestris was an absolute necessity for Father’s plan. So the risk of a few state alchemists dying or resigning from your Potential Sacrifice Pool is worth it for the completion of the circle.

Now. To get to my fucking thought. 

Edward fucking Elric. This fucking fight-me 12 year old troglodyte shows up to the exam and performs circle-less transmutation in front of mother fucking Bradley, demonstrating to one of the seven Actual Fucking Homunculi that he’d already opened the portal. Ed was literally prepped as a human sacrifice before he showed up to Central. A fully set human sacrifice showed up at the homunculi’s door, said “hey look what I can do!”, proved he’d opened the mother fucking portal already, and said “hey yeah hire me”. Human sacrifice, free shipping, no assembly required, handcuffs not included!

They could have just tossed Ed into a shoebox and kept him there until the Promised Day. They wouldn’t even need to make up an excuse he attacked the f u  c k i n g president. That’s fucking treason babey. He’s 12, he’s an orphan, he’s from a rural town in buttfuck nowhere, he’s literally the easiest person alive to disappear. They could have arrested him for assassination crimes, kept him in gay baby jail, and just popped him out for the Promised Day

What do they do instead?! “Oh lmao this kid’s great. Let’s give him infinite money, no supervision, no governmental responsibilities, access to all our secret resources, and toss him on a train to who-the-fuck-knows-where-land”

They fucking did that

And like? They then had the audacity to be concerned when Edward “Fight Me” Elric almost got himself killed about 293 times. Just an endless game of “I thought u were watching him” from one homunculus to another when Ed fucking absconds half-way across the globe to go entice some other hostile entity into murdering him to death. That’s the whole series. Every arc is Ed baiting death while the homunculi are in the background like “:/ wish he wouldn’t do that”

This only gets worse when you consider they later learned Al opened the portal too because really?? These two stab-happy globe-trotting public menaces are 40% of your final evil plan for godhood. 40%. Almost half. You couldn’t fucking set aside a cardboard box to keep these idiots in?

Ooooh, I get it. Your clothes, the knife, this aggressive attitude. It's all role playing!