deadly furniture

I love that thing when people get a little bit tongue-tied and garble what they’re trying to say so they make a little “blegh” 👅 noise and start over. verbal reset button. hitting the top of the tv to unscramble the signal

Found this really scary new horror game yall should check out. It's called indeed.com and it has a sequel called linkedin

tragic. 37 clowns were killed today in a devastating one car pile up.

#the funeral has only one casket. it's what they would have wanted

what’s a canon url to a nonbeliever

did you do it

let’s stop seeing sex as the biggest thing you can do to show someone you love them

everyone knows that the real way to show someone you love them is to find them a really cool rock. not a diamond. just a neat rock that you think they will enjoy

Not a rock THE  ARKENSTONE 

Why just one rock Why not three Why not the silmarils

#i’m pretty sure there’s an entire book on the topic ‘why not silmarils’  (x)

And one on why not the arkenstone

Everyone once in a while this makes an re-appearance on my dash and it’s great

Legendary post

I would like to wish everyone an uneventful new year

It’s only November and this is already getting notes again, you guys are really manifesting this energy early for the new year

We would like to live in Less Interesting Times please

This is the funniest thing ever 😂

Stop letting your heart and your pussy choose your men.

I’m confused, what is left…

Oh nvm lmao my brain. You right sis lol you is right

You really forgot your whole brain.

she read this post with her pussy

Slow burn but it's written by an impatient person

This doesn't affect the speed of the developing relationship at all, but does make for a very passive aggressive narrator.

“They looked into each other’s eyes for a long moment...again. Notably, they were not kissing.”

2003 will be my year