Travis is my homeboy.

Unstoppable force (House’s gay jokes) vs immovable object (Wilson’s repression)

house episode where a new male fellow has the hots for house kinda like cameron did. young and attractive like his fellows usually are. everyone and their mom knows. it gives house endless material for elaborate gay jokes, but he doesn't think the fellow is serious about it. until it's been a while and the fellow doesn't stop. house tells him he's straight, albeit flattered, in his own way. the fellow is genuinely surprised to hear that. this sends house into kind of a crisis about his possible bisexuality. wilson is incredibly interested in house's admirer and when house realizes he does actually like men, wilson is capital J jealous of the fellow. they go out once and make out a bit. wilson starts thinking he's homophobic for being unsupportive of this development, now that there's actually a possibility of house getting with this guy. house is joking when he pesters wilson about being jealous and wanting house to himself and then wilson stupidly does that stupid Oh face and his big brown eyes widen in realization. this is never discussed again

The only way a bisexual house episode would happen is house makes a weirdly specific and knowledgeable joke about gay sex and Wilson asks if that’s true/how he knows that and house goes “from fucking men”. Wilson’s initial reaction is a bit weird so he spends the rest of the episode trying to show how good of an ally he is by trying to support house’s bisexuality by “checking out” men with house like he would with women but it’s just weird. House wants to see how far Wilson will go with his allyship and it gets to the point where house brings Wilson to a gay strip club, where Wilson is extremely uncomfortable. They get back to house’s place and house finally tells Wilson he’s just fucking with him, Wilson doesn’t need to do all that weird shit, just treat him like he normally does. Wilson actually takes it to heart and asks what kind of men house is into and house answers by describing Wilson exactly. Wilson low key freaks but then he realizes house is fucking with him and he’s like “oh you’re messing with me” and house is like “fucking obviously. I like twinks with big butts, why do you think I hired Chase?” Wilson turns to his drink on the table and laughs, camera shows house looking lovingly at Wilson, end of episode

This would save me from whatever the fuck is wrong with me