I Will Fist Fight God in the Walmart Parking Lot.

it was on a friday night that you had decided tonight was the night. you had sent clark the usual duck emoji, smirking as he had immediately seen the text. however, when you arrived home, it wasn't like usual. usually, upon sending the emoji, you'd pounce on him and drag him to the bedroom. tonight, however? radio silence. well, not quite, but that's it felt to clark. you didn't give him those bedroom eyes you usually did on nights you were feeling particularly needy, you insisted on taking a shower all by yourself (he almost crumbled at that) and after dinner, you lounged on the couch to watch a tv show without even asking him to follow you! you just did!

the thing about clark kent is, he's a gentleman through and through. his ma had raised him to be one, and for christ's sake, he was superman! how could he not be a gentleman? but, he sympathizes with himself, you can't spell gentlemna without man, and clark was a man before he was anything else. a very aroused and hopelssly in love man, at that.

he stands awkwardly in the doorway of the living room, staring at you. you noticed, of course, but this wasn't unusual. clark has always had sort of weird quirks—you had always found them endearing. "is something the matter, honey?" your sirupy voice cut through his stream of thought, and suddenly his eyes focus again, gaze meeting yours.

clark has his phone in hand, and he brings it up to look back at the duck emoji you had sent. duck meant sex. you wanted this. he can indulge. you want this.

he knows you do. you sent the text, and he feels like he can almost smell your arousal and it's driving him fucking insane because he just wants to dive in it and taste it and fuck you everywhere so the entire place smells like you and-

in the blink of an eye, his phone is abandonned and he's on you, lips smashed against yours. you barely have the time to react but you do, arms now hanging around his thick neck. his hand latches itself onto your cheeks, fingers pressing into both of them, urging you to open your mouth. as soon as you do, his tongue, which was inhumanely long, snaked into your cavern, exploring its depths. he moaned at the taste of your saliva, almost melting into you as if the flavor of you was his ultimate salvation.

noticing the lack of air filling your lungs, he pulled away, his eyes softening at the sight of you catching your breath. "c-clark... what's... whta's gotten into you?" you licked your lips, face flushed. he looks at you like a puppy begging for its treat. "the emoji... you sent the emoji but you didn't... i thought..." his mind is a rush, moving at a thousand miles per hour as his entire body is begging him to rip your clothes off and take you.

he gives up, his head falling into the crook of your neck. "i just... i really need to fuck you, sweetheart." and as he's confessing this, his hand is gliding towards the waistband of your bottoms, sliding swiftly underneath it.

you think you could ascend.

you bite your lip, rendered mute at the sheer tension of the moment. "i know you want it, baby..." he scoffs, eyes closed. "can smell it."

curse him for being such a dangerously hot and multi-abled alien.

his hand makes its way underneath your panties, finger running through your slit, collecting the slick you've been trying to keep to yourself for the past hour. "ah..." you let out a low sound, almost imperceptible but clark was so hyper-focused on you that the little moan made him shudder.

he uses his forearm to push himself upwards, his hand escaping your bottoms to rush up to his mouth, and when you look at him, you gasp, feeling your walls clench.

because clark has never looked this feral.

his eyes were half-lidded and impossibly dark, his adam's apple bobbing as he swallows your juices, eyes nearly rolling back at the taste. he moans, his cock twitching and growing inside his sweatpants.

"you're gonna give it t'me, right sweetie?" he asks in that low, sultry voice that he only allows himself to use when he'd rather die than not touch you.

the eager nod you gave him marked the moment you knew you were done for.

.

how long has it been? you don't know. you don't know anything, actually. your brain is fogged with how clark was pounding you into the fuzzy carpet, your eyes crossing when the buds running along his dick grazed against the ridges of your walls, the added sensation making you spasm. "f-ffuck-! clark- oh my god, ohmygod—" you can barely form a sentence, let alone link two words together when he knocks at your cervix, your tits bouncing in rhythm with every thrust.

and clark isn't even listening to you, his eyes laser-focused on the sight of his cock splitting you open repeatedly, a vein bulging on his forehead at his intense use of his x-ray vision. "look at that, b-baby... look..." and you don't even bother, too lost in the ecstasy. he sees it all though, the strings of your arousal clinging to his tip every time he pulls away, the ridged of your pussy hooking onto his buds, the contractions of your muscles.

he finally manages to pull his eyes away from the sight, only to be met with the even prettier, albeit messier sight of your fucked out face. tears and drool glossed your skin, your eyes rolled back nearly to the back of your skull, throwing your head back when clark's hips stutter against yours, a white-hot wave washing over him over the sight.

he stilled when his buds hardened and hooked onto your walls, pulling him impossibly deep as he shoots buckets worth of cum deep into your womb. "a-ah! holy sh- hmm, fffuck, baby- i- fuck!" he sobs, jerking down towards you and you moan at the feeling of him filling you up once more, droplets of his sweat dripping onto your buzzing skin.

despite his orgasm, he doesn't stop, "n-need m-moree- needa fill you up-! ah, fuck!" his voice jumps up an octave when his buds finally relax again, allowing him to keep pistoning into you. "d-don't stop, clark! please dont- oh-!" he suddenly grabs your thighs, throwing them over his shoulders before beeending down, succesfully folding you in half. his face is now slotted right in front of yours, and the eye contact is so intense you almost feel shy under his gaze.

a mating press. clark kent had you in a fucking mating press.

you get lost in his ocean blue eyes, barely able to keep the eye conatct when he fucks you almost like he hated you, digging in your pussy. "you're... you're so beautiful, honey... so fucking pretty- all f'me, yeah? all f'me?" you nod, hands pressing against the back of his head to bring him impossiby closer to you, "all for you, clarkie," you confirmed being hastily pressing his against you, imprisoning him in a feverish kiss. clark moans into your mouth, eyes closing. you jolt slightly when you feel a tear drip down on your cheek, peeling your eyes open to see clark crying.

he pulls away, gasping for air as his throat restricts. "i l-love you, love you s'much— need you so, ngh, so bad... wanna breed ya'..." he sobs, whimpering for you. seeing clark become such a slave to his love for you had an inescapable effect on you, and your orgasm was almost immediate. you came with a gasp, the pleasure being so heavy that your eyes had given up on their function, unfocusing and leaving you with the blurry image of clark's flushed expression. your back arched as cream dribbled out of your hole, creating a white ring around clark's base.

in the midst of your orgasm, he pulls out, making you whine for the few seconds your face isn't smushed against the carpet because in a matter of moments, your world tilted before you found yourself face down ass up for your boyfriend. he pressed a hand on your back, urging a deeper arch. "m'sorry baby, m'so sorry..." he apologizes for the his unceremonial behavior but his apologies fall on deaf ears as you couldn't be happier.

your hands clutch the fluff of the carpet when he slams back into you, kneading the flesh of your ass. "just... just need this. s'your fault for making me wait... so long.. to have you- ngh, gosh..." he's hypnotized by the rippling of your ass, and the way your back bends impossibly for a second each time he rams back inside you, pressing you further into the carpet.

with clark kent fucking you like that, you really don’t think you’re making it out alive.

well, your fault for trying to experiment on a poor, farm-grown kryptonian.

your moans are rhythmic, matching the pace of his hips. leaning in, he wraps an arm around you to squeeze your tits, massaging them and rubbing your hardened nipples. "so obedient..." his comment makes your walls flutter around his fat cock. he begins to roll his hips, not quite thrusting. he presses against you, making you drool. "nghhh... fffuuuck... love you... so much.. c-clark-!" you slurred, going crazy at the sensation of his buds hardening slowly again, hooking onto your insides.

"w-want your cum-! want you to b-breed me!" you egged him on, "yeah? y'want it, baby? oh gosh, i'm cumming, m'cummingm'cumming-" he gritted, spilling into you once more. "oh my god! oh god, sweetheart!" he whined, your name escaping him as his hips bucked again, releasing rope upon rope inside you. his orgasm triggered yours, drops of your release trickled down onto the carpet before his hand snaked down to your clit, rubbing furiously and suddenly an intense stream released itself onto the now soaked carpet, the intensity of both of your orgasms making the two of you collaspe in a heap.

he layed on top of you, both of you catching your breaths. "i feel so... sticky." he remarked, "shit... i ruined the carpet." you groaned, knitting your eyebrows together.

a silence settled in, before you broke it. "i'm glad my experiment worked." a beat passes before he reacts, "experiment?"

"i tried conditioning you into associating sex with the duck emoji. it worked."

clarks hums, choosing not to react any further.

a few days later, minutes after the end of your shift, you receive a text from clark.

a duck emoji.

At first it was to get her to leave you alone. She never did, saying it was her duty to make you better. Her words made you bristle. Because you were already better. And if you weren't, you didn't need her help. You didn't want it.

Of course that never stopped her. She would find you everyday, without fail, and drag you with her. You would try to run, only for her to yank you right back. So you settled for hissing. You didn't think you had ever bared your teeth to someone as much as you did to her.

Nothing changed with age as most had hoped. In fact, it got worse. Many would flee the area if they spotted the two of you nearby, just avoid the inevitable bickering. Many had tried to beg to olo'eytan to release Neytiri of her duties to you, but Mo'at never allowed it. Why that was, you may never know. Tsahiks always did things for whatever arbitrary reason they conjured up.

"Starighten up!" A bow smacked you on the back.

You hissed but obeyed.

"Good," Neytiri said before moving to Tsu'tey.

There she was like always, head held high like a pious, uppity child who thought herself better than everyone. Her and Tsu'tey made a fine pair. Both with sticks up their asses. The thought brought a smirk to your lips, one she did not miss. She did not say anything though, instead, she addressed the party.

"There is a hexepede herd just over the river bank. There is an older male. He is large enough to feed the clan for days," she said, hips shifting to one side.

Tsu'tey added on, "We will split into teams to corner it, surround it from all sides," he turned to a pair, "You two, with me". He went down the line of hunters and sectioned everyone into teams. He then reached you "(Y/n), with Neytiri."

"What?" You spat, "You can not be serious. Put me with someone else."

You took a step towards him, but she blocked your path. "It is decided."

You held her gaze. Her angled face looked at you like you were dirt beneath her feet. Like you were insignificant, like your thoughts did not matter.

You huffed, whipping around and mounting your waiting pali (direhorse), the creature snorting and striking the ground, feeling your anger through the bond. The others followed.

Tsu'tey ignored the interaction, but rather looked upwards. "We must be swift, before the clouds bleed."

The herd was not hard to find. They remained by the river, drinking and bathing. At Tsu'tey's signal, everyone split, securing the east, west, north and south points. The large male was in the water, half surrounded by a few smaller females.

You and Neytiri stayed crouched, side by side, behind a dense shrub. From the distance, you saw Tsu'tey signal to her to ready her bow. Without hesitation, she raised her arms, pulling the bow taunt and aiming. You followed. You both waited, breaths quiet and even. Down your arrorhead was the neck of the hexepede. It dipped it's head to drink from the river, unaware of its impending doom.

The sky rumbled. The sound was so loud, you felt it in your chest.

"Raise it," Neytiri said. You did not notice you had lowered your arrow. You scowled and adjusted. It was only in moments likes these you were ever quiet. You bet she loved it. The silence. The peace. Not that it mattered, because once the hunt was over, so will it.

The hexepede raised its head at the sound, scanning it's surroundings.

You waited and watched.

Then right as it calmed, it thundered again. This time louder, more abrupt. Then a drop fell from the sky, right onto its head. The herd ran, perhaps to not get caught in the uncoming rain.

Next to you, Neytiri got up and ran to her pali, jumping into its back and following the others that already gave chase, barely waiting for you. Everyone kept following the herd, gaining on the male. You surrounded it. A hunter on each side, you and Neytitri at the flank and the others trying to block off its path. The rain came down harder, already soaking you all and wetting the earth. With each step, the palis splattered mud. It was becoming hard to see. The rain was dense, thick. It looked more like fog, blurring your vision.

Someone shouted. Perhaps Tsu'tey, maybe someone else. You could not tell.

Neytiri shouted back. Of course she heard. She drew her arm up quickly and before you could blink, shot. The arrow hit, the hexepede went down immediately. But as it stumbled at the impact, the ground beneath it became slippery, the mud now loose. Neytiri's pali struggled to stop. It cried out at it slipped, tipping over. Neytiri tried to calm it but the creature fell, throwing her off and knocking into your own mount, toppling it on its side. The both of you went tumbling down the incline. It was slippery, and you could not grap at anything properly to stop your descent.

It was only when Neytiri was blocked by a large portruding rock, did she stop and you slammed right into her.

You both grunted at the impact.

You clenched your eyes from the pain, trying to push it away and claw at the ground to right yourself.

"Skxawng!" you grabbed at Neytiri's arm, throwing it over you shoulder.

"Fnu(shut up)," she groaned.

Trying to wipe away the unrelenting rain from your eyes, you searched the top on the incline, to make out even one familiar figure, but it was pointless. It was hard to see far in front of you. The pittering of the rain was too loud to hear anyone if they were calling. And they in turn would likely not hear you so you saved your breath. You squinted through the rain and looked around, keeping Neytiri upright as she gained her footing. And in the distance, not far away at all, was small cave dwelling.

Shifting your grip on her, you made your way towards it.

As soon as you crossed the threshold—the curtain of draining water at the entrance—the sounds outside dulled, but only slightly. The overarching cave head kept the inside dry.

With a quick scan, you deemed it safe and shrugged Neytiri off of you and onto the cave floor. You wandered off to the back. There was nothing. No wood, no leaves. Nothing. Nothing to make a fire, nothing to eat. At least you could drink the rain water. The thought was ridiculous but true.

"Skxawng.."you muttered, "we are stranded thanks to your foolishness." You turned to her, arms crossed.

She glanced at you, rolling her shoulder "I could not predict that this would happen."

"I am surprised. Since you always know everything."

"Do not start," she huffed.

"Why? Ashamed?" you goaded,"the all mighty Neytiri, got herself thrown off her pali on a hunt. Like a child who does not know how to tame her own mount."

She said nothing, instead looking out into the rain.

"I should be thankful. Perhaps now I could be rid of you," you continued.

She got up then, "I would be the thankful one. I would no longer have to watch over you—a reckless, insufferable kurkung(asshole)."

"You think I am insufferable?" you laughed in disbelief, "then perhaps you should look inwards. The great mother will show you who you really are: a spoiled, self-important woman who thinks she always knows better."

"I do, I have always known better than you" she stepped towards you, "you do not follow orders, you are not disciplined. You are wild like a nantang pup and just as unknowing." You stepped back. "The day I was assigned to you was the worst of all I have lived. I have not known peace since. You are a baby—always whining and stomping your feet when things do not go your way. And you are careless. Always swaying your hips, rolling your eyes and picking fights with those above you. You do not think. It is by Eywa's miracle you are not dead!" your back hit the wall. Her chest rose and fell where she stood directly in front, crowding you.

"I should have left you in the storm," you whispered, jaw tight.

This was normal for the both of you. It should feel normal. The cruelty, the clipped remarks, the anger. It was familiar. It was a song and dance you two have been doing for years. But now, here in this cave, alone, you both stood chest to chest, skin grazing each other. Just barely. There was a fire behind her eyes, hot and ablaze. fury, defininitely. and maybe something else. Something that was new. Or perhaps it was something you had ignored.

The air felt thicker. Maybe it was the rain. Maybe it was the heat flowing where you bodies touched.

Her fierce eyes pierced into you, still so wide and round even in her anger.

Something warm built in your stomach. Perhaps lower. You tried not to think about it. You tried not to notice the closing distance between you, you tried not to feel the way her thigh brushed yours. It was hard to when your breaths became one, warm huffs that calmed the chill on your nose.

Before you knew it your lips touched, and suddenly she was pressing you firmly against the cave wall. It was not soft. It was not gentle. It was hard, rough, frantic. Your lips parted for hers so easily it should have made you ashamed but all you could focus on was pushing back into the kiss, feeling the way her soft lips sucked on yours. You let out a quiet moan when she bit you. Not enough to break skin, just enough to hurt. You felt the spot throb as she shoved her tongue into your mouth. It was long and wet and demanding. You tried to fight it, to take over, to wrap your tongue around hers, but you felt too light, too weak to the feeling of her, especially when her hand travelled up to you neck and her fingers wrapped around it. The tip of her tongue flicked the roof of your mouth, eliciting another moan from you.

When she pulled back, you gasped, drool pooling at the corner of your mouth. Your eyes were hazy and your body slouched into her, as if all the fire within you was outed from the taste of her. Earthy with a hint of yovo fruit she had for breakfast.

With her other hand she wiped away the drool "So this is what makes you pliant," she hummed, eyes half lidded.

Then she kissed you again.

Her hands travelled downwards, from your neck, rubbing over your chest and your pebbled nipples—your back arched—down your ribs and waist, before touching the strings of your tewng that hung on your hips. Her lithe fingers undid them, letting the fabric pool at your feet.

The cold air touching your bare mound made you shiver.

"ah," you moaned when she touched you, parting your pussy lips. She stroked you gently, keeping her touch light. She dipped lower to your entrance but she did not push in. She circled it and you could feel your wetness ooze out of the fluttering hole.

"So wet" she said, eyes not leaving where she touched you. She pushed in slightly, not enough to breach, just enough to collect the slick there. Her now lubed fingers dragged upwards. Your breath hitched as she came closer and closer to touching your clit. But she didn't. Instead, she used two fingers to rub either side of the hood.

It felt good, but not enough.

You bucked your hips, hoping she would take the hint.

She tsked, "Always so impatient."

You whined when she pulled away, your knees trembling without her support.

She looked at you. You wondered what sight you made. Disheveled? Desparate? You wondered if she liked it. She had to. You hoped she did.

She took your discarded tewng and folded it neatly, placing it at the center of the cave floor "on your back."

Blinking away enough of the haze, you laid your head on the makeshift headrest and shifted at the cold feel of the floor.

She grabbed your ankles, pushing them further apart, and settled between your legs. Her hands rested on your inner thighs, making soothing motions. They inched closer and closer to your center until she stopped at where your inner thigh met your pelvis and pushed you open, even wider. Her calloused thumbs hooked onto your lips and pulled them apart, spreading all of you open for her to see. And once again, she rubbed you, not touching your clit directly. You tried shifting your hips but she pressed you down, immobilising you.

"You want me to touch you?" she looked up at you.

You nodded.

"Then ask. Ask for what you want."

Your bottom lip trembled. You struggled to get the words out, your sane mind fighting against your desperate state. Need won.

"Please" the words left you in a whisper, still too prideful to give in so easily "please…touch me."

And she did.

She pulled back the hood of your clit and tapped it once. Your toes curled. Then, she did something unexpected. She spat directly onto it. The impact made you jump.

"Oh!" you gasped when she circled your needy clit. Her motions were slow and light at first, then she pressed just a little bit harder and sped up. "mmh!" one of your legs hooked around her, trying to find something to ground yourself.

Her other hand, massaged your waist, pinching lightly when your heel dug into her back too hard. It then went upwards. She caressed the underside of your breast beneath your feathered chest piece. She grabbed it and pulled it over your head, leaving you truly naked below her. She brushed your nipple before using her thumb and forefinger to tweak it. She pulled and rolled it gently, watching the way your chest arched into her touch. When she left your chest, you opened your mouth to complain only for her to stuff it with her two fingers. You didn't need any instructions, you just sucked. Spit pooled on your tongue, using it to wet her fingers "mmmh." It tasted like wood and rainwater.

When she was satisfied, she pulled her hand away from your mouth and brought it to your opening. With one finger, she circled it once before pushing in slowly. Your eyes fluttered at the feel of each knuckle pushing past the rim. Once she was all the way in, she crooked her finger, stroking your velvet walls. She eased it out then carefully pushed back in. She kept this rhythm until she found your cushiony sweet spot, that made your eyes roll back. When you were loose enough for her, she added another digit.

You cried out at the stretch.

She waited for you to adjust before thrusting in and out, curling her fingers every time. With her fingers in your tight hole and her rubbing at your clit, a coil tightened in your stomach. She lowered her head to your chest, taking one of your hardened nubs into her hot mouth and flicked it with her tongue, you felt her moan against your chest. Your legs wrapped around her, ankles crossed behind her back.

"Please—please!" you didn't know what you were begging for. Less? More? For release? The words just left your mouth without thought. The wet sounds coming from between your legs were obscene. It was all you heard, paired with her heavy breathing. You didn't know if the rain had stopped or not.

Neytiri pulled back "so good," she praised, "See? It is not hard to be polite. If I had known this was what you needed to listen, I would have done this sooner."

Her words barely registered as the tingly feeling between your legs grew stronger when her pace quickened and her fingers reached deeper.

"Neytiri!"

Your back arched painfully and you cried out, the coil finally snapping as you came undone. Your legs shook and your vision went white. Your breath stopped as you grabbed onto her shoulders, digging your nails into her skin. She kissed you through it, sucking on your tongue that hung out of your mouth "mmf—fphmm!ah!" you humped her hand, riding it out.

You panted when she pulled back, admiring the view of you, thoroughly fucked out on the cave floor. You still thrusted against her, not wanting it to end so soon.

"don't leave, babe," he croaks out, sounding a little groggy and whiny. he snuggles into the crook of your neck, his legs tangled between yours under the duvet. you honestly feel like a flabby doll, letting your boyfriend manhandle you any which way he wants. "you're always so soft in the mornings."

"i have to get up, though," you sigh quietly, conflicted between getting up and facing the day, or staying in and digging yourself further into dick's warm embrace. you know you'll choose the latter. "i have that important meeting, remember?"

dick waves his hand dismissively. "just- ditch 'em. for today," he says, voice muffled, because he's still hidden away in your neck. his hair is soft and a little curly at the ends as you absentmindedly card your fingers through his thick, black locks. "i'm more important than them, anyway, right baby?"

you already hear haley — your boyfriend's loyal pitbull puppy - pad over to your messy bed, settling herself over dick's body. he chuckles to himself, his arm reaching out to give the grey dog a scratch behind her soft ear. "see—? haley thinks you should stay here too. give your boyfriend some well-deserved cuddles."

dick pulls away from your neck, his blue eyes piercing yours. he looks so domestic, and soft, and cute, and absolutely perfect. fuck it, you think to yourself. you're already doomed, anyway. 

Embarrassment follows quickly after, face heating "uhm. I mean. Uh..."

Kyle only laughs good-naturedly, but all you can think about is the fact you're wearing the rattiest pajamas you own, your hair is probably a mess, and your breath most definitely stinks.

"Let's get you checked out by the paramedics, yeah?" Kyle stands up, and against the flashing lights his skin glows in a way that reminds you of the eternal beauty of a phoenix. Cold air bites your skin, makes your stomach twist in anxiety and fluster all at once. "Ghost! I got one for you! Get your ass over here!"

In your sleep deprived mind you don't even realize you're eyeing kyle up. That firemans uniform may not hug hid muscles but damn does he wear it well. face glistening with sweat when he takes his helmet off, grin making your heart stutter.

"The fock do you want, gaz?" A new voice asks, and you flinch three seconds later than a normal person would, mind not quite working when you turn to face–

Oh fuck.

"Is everyone here hot as hell??" You whisper, which is not-at-all a whisper by the way kyle snorts.

The new man is somehow taller than kyle, broad in every sense of the word. His shirt absolutely hugs a fat chest and round stomach, with beefy arms to compliment. You eye the tattoo sleeve hungrily, and only when the man moves to check you for injuries do you look at his face.

A black surgical mask with the bottom of a skull printed on it. Underneath the cap you spot the lightest blonde hair you've ever seen.

"Why do you always give me the eccentric ones?" Ghost, you assume, huffs. He's looking directly at you, gloved hands moving your face to inspect, but its kyle who answers.

"They remind me of you." Kyle leans against the door of the ambulance, arms crossed. God that's hot.

"That a compliment, gaz?" Your emt raises a brow. He doesn't even glance at you when he raises your shirt to check for bruises, only tilting his head at the full-body shudder from the latex on your stomach.

"You want it to be?" Kyle snarks, then turns his focus to you "do you want some caffeine, love? You look dead on your feet."

"Stop trying to drug my patients." A warm palm slides cold metal against your ribs, "breath in deep for me, there you go....good."

Oh.. wow. That makes your thighs clench, and by the look kyle shoots his friend he agrees.

"Oh, obedient too." Ghost quips, moves to the other side and this time you don't need prompting to breath in. He looks all to smug when he looks at kyle "reminds me of you."

You...you must be hallucinating.

No way two obscenely attractive men are flirting with eachother and somehow you're involved in it.

"Hearts pounding, runt." Ghost whispers, in a way that certainly isn't professional. He completely tosses professionalism out the window to kneed a thumb into your hip, speaking over his shoulder "this one could be fun, gaz. It clearly likes the idea. Been eyeing you up plenty."

"Ghost...we talked about this..." kyle groans, reaches across you to pry ghosts hand off and definitely doesn't cop a feel with the hand bracing on your thigh.

"We don't scout on the job, you have thirteen stitches to prove that, remember?"

"But this one would be fun..."

"..."

You pointedly stay deathly silent, afraid any move will have them drawing away.

"...fine." kyle relents, pecking ghost on the ear before handing you a scrap on paper he most definitely already had written.

"Go get some sleep, call us if you want. Sorry about the apartment." With that, ghost is dragging kyle off and even your sleep-deprived brain can figure out what those two will be doing.

You look down at the paper.

What...huh? Two hot guys...want...you??

in the kitchen, clark busies himself with laying out all the necessary spices. he consults the recipe ma jotted down for him to double check everything and then grabs a cutting board to cube all the vegetables. you can faintly hear the knife knocking wood, in quick succession, and you try not to worry at how fast he's going. 

water bubbles on the stove top, at a steady boil as the vegetables and aromatics mingle. the smell streams into the living room, you picture a cartoon-like trail of steam floating in the air as your eyelids begin to grow heavy again. you let it take you, trusting in clark that he’ll get things set up for you.

when you wake, with a kiss to your clothed shoulder this time, clark is holding your bed tray table, bowl of soup perched carefully and slices of buttered sourdough that instantly has you sitting up and scooting further into the couch so he can fit next to you. the couch is surprisingly big enough. he fits the plastic legs over his lap and you lean into him.

“smells good. thank you,” you poke him with your nose, taking a respective sniff of his shirt as you go. your sinuses clear up with the upright position of your body, he smells good.

“gosh, you don't have to thank me, ‘know i'd do anything for you,” he huffs, bringing a cupped hand and spoon full of soup your way. he blows at it gently before tilting it into your waiting mouth. you adjust a little and lean forward so it's easier for him to feed you.

you immediately feel better, warmth soothing your throat and tastebuds being gently caressed by the spices, pleasantly similar to how clark makes you feel all the time. he takes the eager tilt of your chin as a sign to feed you another mouth. “god, this is-”

you kiss him on the cheek, “mmh- really good. i love you. thank you.”

you must not realise it. sure, the two of you haven't said it to each other yet, but it was implied. and now you’ve done it. you’ve said it out loud and he doesn't know what to do with himself except for spooning more of the soup into your mouth.

“you love me?”

“‘course i do, clark. i know you love me too, otherwise you wou’n’t be he’e.” toast obstructs your last few words but he gets the jist. he bites back the big toothy grin hiding behind his lips, but his dimples make an appearance anyway. when you look up at him, you’re very suddenly vulnerable, despite the confidence with which you delivered your previous words. he thinks you're sweet. “right?”

he breathes out a laugh against your forehead, “yeah, hun. i love you too.”

and poof your headache is gone.

And it’s not like you thought they were cheating. You really didn’t. But that they didn’t mean they didn’t want to. That there weren’t linger stares, touches of excitement or moments of connection where they thought ‘we shouldn’t’. That they were a much better fit, they made much more sense, and it was something you knew everyone knew. Like it was an open secret, and they were just waiting for the ball to drop.

“Sugar, you wanna go with me to buy a purse tomorrow? I bought new crimson heels, and they need a matching purse. I’ll even throw in one of the really expensive matcha you like.” Cat asked as she sat on your desk and poked at your cheek to get you attention from where you seemed like the computer was threatening to bite you.

“Sure, just us?”

“Yeah, Lois seems pretty busy, but I guess-“

“No, just us is perfect. And the matcha of the month at Matchacha has an Amarena cold foam.” You smiled up at her, Cat smiling and nodding.

“Great! It’s a date. I’ll leave you to it.” She squeezed your shoulder before standing up and walking back to her desk, just as Clark was arriving back to his from Perry’s office. You shrunk back into your computer fast, not leaving a second wasted on your historical dive into US-Venezuela relations when Clark stopped at your desk.

“You’re dating Cat now?” He teased, smirking down at you. You looked up and smiled back because you weren’t mad, not really. You were just… scared. Envious. Undermined and cynical.

“Yeah, we’re going shopping and going to get the matcha of the month.” You responded and looked back down, fingers now hovering nervously over the keyboard.

“Oh, right. I said I’d take you last week for that- I’m sorry, sweetheart.” His face dropped a little when he realized it might as well be a date because Cat was taking you to do what Clark had failed to.

“It’s fine, you’ve been busy. You don’t even like matcha.”

“Yeah, but I shouldn’t be too busy for you.”

“But you are, and it’s fine.” You mumbled, not even realizing what you said sounded like it wasn’t actually fine.

“Baby, I’m sorry. How about I come over tonight? It’ll be a little late since Lois and I have a meeting, but I can still make it worth your while.” The last part was a promise of indecency. You knew that Clark never asked you for sex or affection straight up. He said it between jokes and hooded eyes, he’d tell you he was hungry while moving his hand up your thigh or ask you to go home while kissing your neck. But what, he’d get himself riled up with Lois and since he couldn’t have her, you’d be the next best thing? Oh, shit. You were consumed by it now. You were being irrational and catty.

“No- uhm, we have craft club tonight and I’m staying the night at Joan’s. Her husband’s away and she feels lonely. Scared. Needs a big, strong men to protect her. Couldn’t find one but I know my way around a zurriaga – a stick with a piece of leather. My dad used to smack me with it. Soft, though! I have one in my closet. Anyways, can’t tonight.” Stop fucking talking. Jesus. Every time you lied, you’d have to add an ultra-personal and graphic story to make up for it. So, the thing about Joan was mostly a lie. But the zurriaga story was true, your dad did smack you with it and then gifted it to you when you moved. Sometimes hard. But you didn’t want to freak out Clark.  He was good and pure and had been nothing but kind to you the past nine months you’d been together. Clark nodded with his lips pursed and a confusion that said he didn’t know if to ask further questions.

“Right, I’m going to the Metropolis University library to speak to a Latin American history professor. Wish me luck.” You said, standing up so fast you’d think you would be the one with superpowers and shoved your laptop into your bag, stumbling on your moccasins slightly. He immediately grabbed your waist to help your balance.

“Good luck, baby. I love you, okay?” Clark said firm and honest and you believed him. You did, which is why the feeling overwhelming your body was guilt about feeling like this. Because you shouldn’t and you swore you wouldn’t. You swore if you were ever in a relationship again you wouldn’t worry all the time. You wouldn’t believe every insecurity racking up your brain. That was before this situation had started though, before Clark knocked you off your feet and Lois became one of your closest friends. You nodded and squeezed his hand twice, walking away from him.

You heard it before you saw it. Clark was early, a really rare occurrence and there was Lois ranting about something sitting on his desk next to him. She was wearing a skirt and had her legs crossed, her bare knee so close to Clark’s hands it made you dizzy. She was airy and bubbly and Jimmy stood in front of her laughing along too. She was a beacon of beauty, light, intelligence. The darling of the daily planet.

You gulped and tried to keep a straight face as you stepped into the threshold of the office. You were quiet, having thrown over a sweater Joan lent you this morning, grey and lumpy and just like your taste. Clark would usually look up when you entered a room, he swore he could smell you and hear your heartbeat faster than anything else. But this time, he had his nose in his coffee cup and his ears pressed on Lois’s loud voice. You faded into the background against her. Great. You hung around the reception a minute longer, listening to Kate tell you about a paper delivery problem when Perry stepped out of his office with someone else, probably around his age.

“And these two are my best reporters. Kent and Lane.” He pointed to them, the other man nodding and looking at them.

“And they’re like a power couple?” The man rose his hand and motioned at the two. Your breath hitched as you watched.

“I don’t reckon. Probably should, though.” Coffin, nailed. Your boss, who had just this Monday ripped you a new one because of your lacklustre article, had just said he thought Clark and Lois should be together.

“They’d look good together.” Oh. That hit harder than it needed to. You were different. Very different from Lois and Clark, blue eyes and white skin. And that was a new insecurity you hadn’t dared to explore this week. You said bye to Kate and finally walked towards your desk, stupidly in front of Clark’s and you wondered if he’d notice if you switched it, change with Ron and get some distance between them. Clark finally looked up, a warm smile taking over his face when he spotted you.

“Hey, you are late, miss.” Lois teased as she noticed you too, smiling at you with the warmness of a friend.                              

“Right, sorry.” You couldn’t say you were right on time but had been standing at the entrance for what felt like ages. Lois gave you a confused look when you didn’t tease back, watching you move into your routine. You placed your water bottle on the desk, let your hair free from the claw clip and located your notebook.

“Honey, hi. I texted you last night.” Clark stood up and walked around towards you, he knew you weren’t a fan of PDA so he just took your hand into his, wrapping his hand around your pinky when you threatened to move it. You felt guilty to let him touch you when you’d spent the whole week doubting his goodness and his love.

“Oh, sorry. We had some tequila and tapped out early.” This one was true.

“You were doing crafts drunk?” He asked with a small laugh, imagining your clumsy hands trying to mold some air-drying clay and whining about it getting under your nails.  You became whiny and filter less when tipsy. He wished he was there to see it.

“The drinks were after.” You watched as he placed one hand on your arm and felt the soft fabric of your sweater.

“Hm, right. Did you talk to your sister?”

“No, not yet. It’ll be fine by Saturday.” You shrugged, because you were siblings and that was just what you did- fight and then pretend nothing happened, laugh over breakfast and then repeat the cycle.

“Ah, okay. Is this sweater new?” What was he? The FBI? What’s with the questioning?

“No. Okay, I’m heading down. Have a good day.” Clak frowned impossibly sweet, like it upset him that you didn’t have anything else to say. Nothing sweet to mention, no compliment about his hair he had styled the way you liked this morning, no knowing smile about his twisted tie. You were acting weird the whole week, shrugging him off but he thought maybe you needed space and were on your period or something (you weren’t, he could very creepily smell your cycle). You wore pants and sweaters the whole week, even though you usually liked adding a dress or a skirt. He held onto you when you tried to walk away.

“Hey, slow down. Stay with me for a minute. Talk to me.” He pleaded, urging to shake you or kiss you to see if you’d snap out of whatever it was that was making you like this.

“Don’t wanna keep you, you and Lois need to work. Wonder team and all.”

“Oh, please, he’s all yours, he’s insufferable.” Lois added, you tried to smile at her, but she noticed it didn’t reach you eyes, not even your cheeks. You felt like she was giving you her permission to be with your man and it made you feel so small. But you knew, you knew it was all inside your head and no harm was done and you knew, but knowing didn’t make you feel better.

“We’re almost done, either way. C’mon, let’s go for a coffee and tell me about your week. I miss you, baby. You seem off.” Clark asked and tried to pull you closer to him, nose nuzzling into your hair and a smile inevitably appeared just feeling you close, having you to breathe in made him feel lighter.

“I’m- I do have a deadline. I’m fine, just on my period.” You weren’t, he knew you weren’t. As he tried to think of what to say, you left his grip and turned on your feet fast and away from him.

“I’m- I’ll be downstairs.” You yelled and didn’t look back. His touch felt like pity, his words felt like obligation, his eyes looked like he was picturing someone else. And he wasn’t- he really wasn’t, you tried to know that. You tried to push it deep into your brain. But the comment had settled it, what you knew everyone thought and what you suspected Clark could be trying to ignore because he wanted to do right by you. But it felt heavy in your chest, you saw Dean in some of his words, how he talked to you so carefully like you were a grenade and how he looked at you with confusion and disappointment when you acted this way. It gave you acid reflux and made you feel too hot under your skin.

“Do you think I’d look good with some highlights?”

“Yeah, you would. Wanna try something new?” Cat responded as she stirred the fabric in the shelf, trying to look for her size.

“Maybe, I don’t know. Just-“

“Feeling antsy? You look antsy.”

“Yeah, just… weird in my own body. Like I’ve lost control.” You said and sipped on your drink, still watching Cat sort through the underwear to find the last piece for her 5 for 60 deal.

“Maybe buy something that makes you feel good? You’d rock that bra.”

“How could you possibly know that?” You shrunk your eyes and suspected this was just a way to get you to buy something and make her feel less guilty of all that she shopped. You glanced at what she was pointing at, and it was admittedly beautiful, pink with flowers and lace.

“Okay, miss sassy pants. That’s a good shade of pink for your skin tone, you love embroidery and you hate wiring. If you like it, you’ll rock it.”

“Oh, you really know me.” You just responded, Cat giving you a firm smile and rolling her eyes. You walked up to the bra and looked at it closer, running your fingers over the embroidery.

“I do, honey. What’s up with you? Is it about Perry?” You debated on asking, wondered how royally you would fuck up everything if you admitted it bothered you- if you told her about what Perry and his colleague said, about how you had lied to Clark to avoid him because you were upset about him and Lois being so glued at the hip.

“Yeah.”

“Hey, Joan.” Clark said as he walked into the archive room, looking at the woman with cherry red hair and a seemingly glued on frown that only changed for you. You seemed to be able to do that to people. Clark was enamoured with the fact that you had made the whole building love you so fast. He got the security guard to learn his name after the third gifted snickers bar and six months. He learned yours a week in. He knew why, you had the grace of Lady Di, the humour people would pay for and when you weren’t carrying baked goods, you still smelled like sweetness. How could anyone not love you? How had he even gotten so lucky to be the one that got to love you the most?

“Do you need anything? I need to go pick up my husband from the airport.” She glanced as she was putting her things away, seemingly getting ready to leave.

“No- no, I can look for it myself. How were crafts last night?”

“What crafts? It’s every other week.” Joan looked at him like he was being weird and Clark’s face dropped.

“You- you weren’t with-“

“I was. But she invited herself over, we drank while watching Love Actually and fell asleep. She’s the only person I’d let interrupt my precious nights alone.” Clark gulped, nodding to Joan. So, you lied about your period, lied about crafts and about Joan needing you. You were definitely avoiding him and hiding the reason why.

“Bye then.” Joan announced, done with the conversation and stepped out of the archive, leaving Clark alone. He hadn’t actually come down for a document; he wanted to pry if you had said anything today about why you were acting strange. But he got an answer either way. His heart started beating faster and a weird tension took over his neck and shoulders like he had been clenching his jaw the whole day. He quickly went back to the newsroom, coming up to Lois and Jimmy who were also getting ready to leave.

“I- I think my girlfriend’s mad at me.” Clark announced, making both persons turn to him in an amused grin.

“You think? You’d know if she was, she almost beat me up for saying her lunch smelled weird.”

“Well, that was really mean, but I- she lied about her plans last night and has been working downstairs the whole week.” Clark was confused as to how he hadn’t noticed before, he had actually been busy this week, but he’d never seen you mad or really upset. You hadn’t had a fight yet- just small spats that ended in both of you laughing.

“Now that you mention it, I invited her for lunch today and she said she had plans already, then I saw her eating a sandwich on the staircase. She’s been weird to me too.” Lois said, eyebrows raising as she connected the dots.

“Well, those could have been her plans.” Jimmy joked, not getting the seriousness because you were always such a chill person. But he frowned when he remembered you biting your lips trying not to cry when you left Perry’s office on Monday. It was the same expression you had when you went to watch the sheep movie last month, whimpering into your sweater. And the same one you had when Clark and Lois were high fiving every two seconds on Tuesday.

“You don’t think it’s about… you two?” All three of them looked confused as Jimmy was the one to connect the dots before them. Shit, should he have gone into reporting?

“Of course it is, idiots.” Steve said, standing next to them and laughing like they were morons for not noticing it. Clark’s mouth went dry, a twitching taking over his right eye. He looked flushed, this reaction compared to slight Kryptonite poisoning, like his body was rejecting everything going on right now and how he didn’t fucking realize.

“What-“

“On Monday, Perry laid onto her about her article – she told me, because you two weren’t here. When you came back, you immediately sat together and started sharing coffee. She left then. It’s been the same all week, as soon as she sees you two being buddy-buddy, she leaves.” Is Steve a better person than them?

“Oh god- fuck.” Lois shut her eyes, feeling nauseous. You were so nice, such a good friend, such a good girl and she had a hand in making you feel bad when she knew. She knew about your ex, about your fiddling hands when you told them how sometimes it still affected you and how Cat hugged you. She was a dick. A horrid friend, an evil woman. If Lois was freaking out, Clark was so out beyond that. The man of steel was shivering and twitching. Jimmy was cringing at them, seeing both people with genuinely good intentions and who both adored you look sickened at the way they had acted.

“You know, you really should pay more attention to your girl. I can take her off your hands, if you can’t be bothered-“

“Steve.” Jimmy warned, but Clark couldn’t defend himself because Steve was right. He needed to handle it, fast before you got in your head further and he couldn’t do much to pull you out.

It was fine, it was on sale. It was cute. It did look good on your skin tone. You look at your reflection on the mirror behind your bedroom door and tried to like it, Hole playing loudly on your speakers to try and drown out your thoughts. You sighed finally, looking for your shirt and dropping it with a yelp when you saw what was neither a bird or a plane hovering outside your window, it was an image of red and blue and a face filled with such sorrow it was clear through the glass. You held your hand to your heart that was threatening to jump out of your chest, rolling your eyes at the fact that Clark couldn’t just fucking knock on a door. You walked out of your room and opened the balcony, motioning him in while you went back for your shirt.

“Baby, I can’t begin to tell you how sorry I am. I feel absolutely horrible.” He said as soon as he stepped in and followed you into your room. You shrunk your eyes at him, frowning.

“What did you do?” You asked carefully, hands defensively up like you were ready to burst into tears and punch in embarrassment. It couldn’t be happening to you again; this time it was worse because it was your friend-

“For being such an ass this week. I’ve been neglecting you and been working with Lois and I know how that would feel. How it looks.” Ah, he realized.

“Oh, you don’t have to be sorry for that. It’s your job and your priority. I’m not mad.”

“I know you’re not mad because you’re wonderful but you’re my priority too. I’ve been a horrible boyfriend if it isn’t clear.”

“It’s fine, Clark. Really. I’m not going to break up with you or anything.” You were confused as to why he was so regretful and he was confused as to how you didn’t get why he was apologizing

“It’s not about that, honey. I want you to be happy and secure- not run and hide in the archive because you feel bad. I should never make you want to be far from me. I should make you feel loved and safe.” You sat down on your bed, sighing. You didn’t want this to turn into that. That’s why you didn’t say anything.

“Clark, it’s nothing-“

“No, don’t say that. Don’t undersell what you feel, I don’t think you’re crazy. I should’ve noticed you had been off and done something. Pressed harder. Been better.”

“I could have said something, too. It’s just not fair to be upset when you’ve been together since before I even got here. You guys are partners. Everyone thinks you two should be together. Even Perry.” You shrugged, like you accepted defeat in a competition no one else was participating in. She wins, they win. Clark knelt down in front of you, shaking his head.

“What- why would Perry-“

“This morning. He told his colleague he thought you two should be together. They said you looked like an all American couple.” Clark groaned, eyes closed as he imagined how that would feel to listen. If he heard he would have said something, done something.

“No- no, me and Lois don’t-“

“Well, you did before. You’ve been inside her. Came inside her, she knows what you look like when you-“ His hands found your face, holding you to look at him before you kept spiralling.

“Hey, no, don’t do that. Yes, it happened. We were together, but it was awkward and it was mistake. We both knew it from the get-go; heart wasn’t in it. I didn’t even finish inside her, I wore a condom and pulled out and I think the second time didn’t even count I got a phone call and we stopped.” You laughed sadly, making him smile at his overt attempt to make you feel like you were way more special and better. Clark immediately softened when he saw you smile, feeling like he had won slightly.

“It’s nothing, barely remember and you’ve clouded my mind ever since I met you. You and your beautiful eyes, I don’t think about anything else. That’s why I was putting everything into this piece; I’ve sort of been lagging because you’re really distracting.”

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled, pouting like you actually felt bad. He laughed slightly, sporting those award-winning dimples as he squeezed your cheeks and placing your forehead against his, staring into your eyes and honestly, can he buy contacts? It makes you shake and wither.

“Never be sorry about that, honeybee. You can’t help it. Not your fault I’m in love with you.” You huffed, rolling your eyes and looking away. The music in your bedroom was still loud and angry.

“I’m not saying I’m not gonna work with Lois or anything because it’s dumb and I know you don’t want that, but I’ll always be there for you first, okay? And Lois is just a background character, you’re the protagonist.  You’re all I see. All I need. Tell me you get that.” You would try, really try not to let fears and irrationalities cloud your brain whenever something slightly off putting or reminded you of the things that had happened before. Because Clark never lied, never undermined you or mislead you. He never hid you or dismissed you. He wasn’t Dean. He was the man that flew the skies, protected the earth and came back down to pull you into his arms ask you about what you wanted for Christmas. You knew what you had was solid, it was real and it was all Clark had ever known. It was all you ever wanted to know.

“Alright, yeah.”

“Yeah? Okay. Good. Great. Don’t lie to me though, Joan told me.” He mentioned and you cringed, nodding.

“Sorry. Just didn’t want to admit it.”

“I know, baby. Still, you don’t wanna know how it felt to hear you lie to me. Thought you were actually dating Cat.” Clark teased.

“As if. Should’ve seen her today, we went into Victoria’s Secret and they knew her by name.” You did feel a little bit like an ogre next to her.

“That’s where you got that little number you had on?” Clark whispered, hands dropping your face to rub up your thighs. Your eyes went wide open, not realizing that while waiting for you to see him outside he had definitely seen the try on.

“You saw it?”

“Maybe. Show me, just to be sure.” You agreed, standing up and taking off the oversized shirt you had put on. Clark hissed immediately, hands on your hips to pull you back down and closer to him. His breath was hot on your skin as he looked at your chest unashamedly, how the lace pressed softly onto your skin and the embroidery drew on the sides of your breasts, all contrasting with your skin tone into a beautiful, blinding, irresistible view. The suit was suddenly too tight, too smothering just like it felt when he put it on and flew to you, so deadly afraid of what could be going on in your mind.

“I’m- uh, don’t even know what to say.” He was blushing, swallowing the saliva that was pooling up in his mouth.

“Can you try?”

“It’s uhm- it should be illegal. I think I’m going to have to quit my job. Or at least write a new segment: just an ode to you and your excellent lingerie choices.” You laughed, pushing him away slightly.

“Cat chose it.”

“I- I think I need to get on venmo and tip her.” Clark smiled as you giggled, shaking your head at his ridiculous complements. Everything was worth it if it made you smile like that. You licked your lips, placing a hand at his cheek and he immediately kissed your wrist, a reflex.

“Just gonna talk it up then?”

“No, I’m gonna put my mouth to very, very good use.”

Clark had loved you with every single ounce of his soul. It genuinely hurt him how much he loved you. So when he broke up with you. It was the most cowardly thing he had ever done in his life. He still remembers crouched there in front of you on the sofa spilling out those words.

"You know I love you more than anything right honey?" He coos rubbing his thumb over your hand. You raised an eyebrow at him. "Alright what do you want Kent?" you laughed jokingly at him until you saw the look on his face. The way he gulped nervously looking at you with pain in his eyes.

"I'm not sure this relationship is a good idea baby" The words felt foreign and like pure venom to him.

The way you looked at him like you did something wrong. As if you didn't love him hard enough.

"It's for your own good okay? It's safer if I'm not in your life. Me being superman brings you so much danger." He still remembers how you cried. Hugged his leg. Begging him to stay. Telling him you didn't care about the risks.

It kept him awake at night.

Still. He kept in contact with you every now and then.

Until he tried to shut off completely.

It was cowardly.

A year later and you still were single. Alone in your own apartment except for your cat jinx. You didn't hate Clark for what he did. After a while you really understood why he broke things off. You knew he was right. You kept the heart locket he got you. A photo of him to keep close to you in one side. Your cat in the other. You were never seen without it. Every so often you'd check the news to see regular updates about superman. Smiling as you saw that he saved someone from a crumbling building or a cat stuck somewhere stupid. It was your way of still having him in your life.

That night you were fast asleep in your bed. Unaware of the chaos happening outside , the fires. The collapsing building. The cries of people, you were at home.. safe in your bed.

That was until you heard tapping at your balcony window. Then. Nothing.

Then another tap. The tapping started to become more regular.

"Jinx! Go back to sleep" You whine burying your head in the pillow. But the tapping Became more intense. More rapid.

"Jinx what the -" you cut yourself off when you see that jinx is asleep next to your pillow on the double bed and your heart started pounding loudly. You frantically grabbed the first thing you could get your hands on , which unfortunately for you.. was your hairdryer.

With a deep breath you made your way over to your balcony window , you were just wearing a baggy old band shirt and tore the curtain open ready to open that door and strike.

Until you jolted out of your skin completely seeing a familiar blue tone. It was Clark.

"WHAT THE FUCK" you shrieked dropping the hairdryer opening the door and he looked ruined. Suit and face covered in soot , breathing heavily. Lip busted. His hair was longer than when you last saw him.

"Hey.. " He simply spoke frantically to get inside. Your jaw dropped and held your hand near your heart feeling your heart thud violently.

"THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN HEY! what the FUCK CLARK" He flinched slightly at your tone his hands shaking as he put them up in defence.

"I... I had to see you ! I'm sorry. Please... I .. I don't know why. It's ... everything's a mess I... came straight here." He looked like there was something in his eyes. Something desperate. You had seen his look before.

"Come in" you say softly stepping aside and he walks in carefully as you shut and lock the door behind him hugging yourself slightly. He looks around the room still seeing everything in place. The pretty photos , fairy lights. Little trinkets he got you. He even offers the weakest smile looking at jinx.

He turned to you. A shudder slipping from his lips and you looked at him tilting your head.

"Clark... are you okay?" It was a stupid question really. He hesitates before reaching a shaking hand out to place on your cheek for just a moment... almost as if checking he was real.. if you were real, If he was here.

"Clark.." You tried again and he caught a glimpse of the locket he got you. His breathing got heavier and he carefully lifted it delicately with his bloody hands.

"You kept it..." He states painfully. It broke him right to his core. He knew you kept everything everyone gave you, but even this? How dare he even be here right now. But you let him in. No hesitation.

He opened it up seeing the photo of him and your beloved cat. Oh he was hurting. He closed it the noise echoing painfully.

"CLARK!" You tried one last time and he clears his throat dropping his hands. "Yeah?" He asks weakly.

"Can i get you anything..food.. water.. a shower?" You asked really worried about him. The caring never stopped.

"I... uh.. didn't come all this way just for a shower. But I would love one... please" He rubbed the back of his neck. He wanted to clean every inch of the night away.

"Okay.. I think I've still got one of your shirts and a pair of your joggers laying around." You beamed softly digging into your drawers. Oh it only hurt him more. You really haven't tried to erase him in any way.

You pass him the shirt , the joggers a towel and lead him the the bathroom. Despite him knowing his way .. he let you. "Just uhm... give me a call if you need anything.. sorry I only have cherry shower gel or mango" you offered a weak giggle.

You turned away and he frantically grabs your wrist panicking.

"Hey.. what's up?" You tilt your head and he hesitates "can... you please stay outside the door... or just..  nearby please?" He didn't wanna be alone. Not with his mind. Not now. He was utterly terrified of all the noises in his head. All the horrific screaming replaying.

You look at him .. really look at him, he looks like he might break, sure to the world he was superman. But right now. You're just looking at the broken Clark. The same Clark that looked at you just like this when he split up with you.

"Okay.." You nod softly sitting down outside the bathroom and he leaves the door ajar. Jinx had woken up with a stretch and waddled over with a curious meow. You put your finger to your lips and he sat by you outside the door as the shower started.

You waited patiently. Not saying anything. Giving him the chance to talk if he wanted. But nothing. When the shower stopped you waited a little longer.

The door opened and there he was in the shirt and joggers you had given him.

"Want me to wash your suit?" You gestured to the superman suit covered in soot which was now on the floor and he nods.

"Would you?" He asks like you had just offered to marry him.

"Yeah of course... I'll get you some water as well.. you're welcome to stay Clark, you know where the guest room is" You made your way to the kitchen placing the suit carefully into the washing machine and when you turn Clark is by the doorway , crouching down petting jinx. Like he belongs here.

"Clark... this is the kitchen. Not the guest room" You tilt your head at him and he nods. "I know..." You pass him the water and lead him to the guest room. He looked numb. Agonisingly numb. He just sat there on the edge of the bed his eyes a dull blue. He gets under the covers.

"Do ... you need anything else?" You fidget with your hands and he really wants to stop himself from asking.

"Can you stay with me... please don't leave" He begged like a lost puppy. Your heart ached.

You should say no.  You should really fucking say no. Just walk out and leave him. But instead you crawled onto the bed next to him tucking yourself under the sheets.

"Do you wanna talk about it ? Why are you here Clark?" You asked again. He looks at you a shaky breath leaving his lips.

"Told you... needed to see if you were okay" He answered simply. Despite the fact a tear was falling down his face. You reach out gently wiping it with your hand and he gasps his hand grabbing at yours almost begging you to keep it there.

"Talk to me big blue" You hum rubbing his cheek gently and this time his hand reaches out to hold your face. He needed the contact desperately. You sighed painfully shuffling closer and he slots himself between your legs and resting his head against your chest so he can listen to your heartbeat pounding. he made sure he wasn't putting his entire body weight on you.

"It was really bad tonight .." He starts already tearing up. You tilted your head and brushed a hand through his hair letting him talk.

"There was so much blood.. I've seen it all before but not like this. The screams .. I can still hear the screams. I got everyone out... but" He stops himself a few sobs ripping from his lips as if it hurt him to do so.

"What happened.." You carried on brushing his hair , the faint smell of soot lingered still alongside the mango shower gel he used. There was still that natural Clark smell that you just missed.

"It's so stupid ... but there was this beautiful couple. ... young... and they were in the collapsing building... they got out and went to hospital but .. the way they were holding each other and the guy was begging her to stay with him... it just... it reminded me of us.. and.. how I could lose you and not be here to save you" He sobbed. Your heart was beyond the point of repair at this point.

"Clark.." you started but he propped himself  up to hold your face and he cut you off.

"I threw it all away ! And I'm not here to keep you safe" You shushed him cupping his face to wipe his tears away pressing your head against his.

"I am here. I am safe Clark.. okay? Nothing is going to happen to me. You're here. You are safe" you pulled him back into your arms rocking him slightly. You pressed a few kisses into his hair and he tried to anchor hisself holding onto you and listening to your heart. He even pressed a kiss to your locket.

"I need you to be here with me" He grabs your face frantically his breathing shaky.  You tilt your head confused at him and raise an eyebrow sweetly.

"Clark.. I am here with you " You coo and he shakes his head desperately.

"No no.. here. Please" You were even more confused until he grabs your face and kisses you deeply, it's a desperate kiss. A kiss full of love and fear.

You pull away shaking your head at Him.

"Clark. You are not in a good headspace. That is not what you need" But he presses his forehead against yours again grabbing your hand and placing it on his chest. His heart was pounding.

"I need you to know I know what I'm doing. I need this. I need you to come back to me baby..." The nickname slipped out before he could stop it. But his eyes seemed so sure.

"Clark.. if we do this there is no going back you know they don't you?" He rapidly shakes his head.

"I .. don't wanna go back.. I wanna be right here" He sniffles tears still rolling and you nod moving closer pulling his lips back on yours slowly.

He whimpers kissing you back slowly tears rolling down his face , the kiss was so sweet at first , his tongue slides into your mouth tangling with yours and his hands roamed your body desperately trying to memorise it. The taste of spearmint lingered and you pull away gasping for a breath and rest your head against his.

You gulp softly and kiss him again , he weakly smiles into the kiss tears still flowing and he grabs your legs and slowly rocks against you, you can feel him hardening and you whine into his mouth.

"Let me see you please.. been so long." He begged and you take the shirt off , your breast already loose and he almost sobs again taking his own shirt off.

"You're so beautiful... so beautiful" He sniffles leaning down to kiss your breasts softly , his hands cupping them and then looking at you pressing another kiss to your lips. At this point you almost had tears falling down your face. He pressed kisses down your neck. Down your chest .. placing a kiss especially over where your heart is racing.

"You still wanna do this ?" You asked and he nods taking the joggers off , he was painfully hard for you. The tip was swollen and angry and he leans down to kiss you again. Your hand reached down to wrap around his dick moving your hand up and down and he sobs into your mouth.

"That feels so good baby..." He whines rutting his hips up to meet your hand. He peppers kisses all over your face and pushes your hair behind your ears. He stopped your hands.

"Let me inside you baby.... Really need that" He looks at you his blue eyes glowing with desire and you take your thong off , his legs almost buckle.

"Gonna be so gentle... i promise" He coos

"No... take what you need Clark" you hold his face as he slowly his pushes into your soaking wet pussy he's missed so much. Your jaw dropped and head throws back at the agonising stretch. He bottoms out straight away. A gut wrenching sob leaves his throat as he leans down to kiss you.

"Oh thank you baby.. thank you" He gives you a second to adapt pressing more kisses on your face and then on your Locket.

He gently grabs your hips choosing a pace and starts fucking into you his eyes not leaving yours. The sounds you were making were like heaven to him. You were home to him. He cradled your face again kissing you all sloppy but loving, spit getting strung everywhere, his thumb brushing across your face rocking his hips.

"Missed your beautiful face" He sniffles and kisses a tear that fell down your face. In fact the tear only spurred him on more as he picks up the pace holding onto your hips a tiny bit more harsher shoving his dick into you like a man possessed.

"Oh Clark!" You shrieked wrapping your legs around him and he groans flipping you over so you're on top and he grabs your hips pulling you in for a tight hug as he fucks his hips upwards into your soaking pussy.

"Oh fuck.. gosh.. come back to me honey.. please come back to me baby" He actually sobbed and you grabbed his face resting your head against his again.

"I'm here kal... I'm here baby" You spoke so softly. But the second his kryptonian name left your mouth he sobbed softly kissing you deeply ,grabbing your hips and pounding upwards deeper than before making you shriek into his mouth and slide your tongue against his , he has no idea what came over him. He just knew he was meant to be here.

"I've got you... NGHH.... It's all okay.. everything's okay.." He whimpered into the sloppy kiss , the harder he fucked you, the more you soaked his dick and the more your locket was bouncing.

"Clark ... I'm gonna-" you whimpered tightening around his dick and feeling your walks tighten before you crumble and collapse in his arms reaching your high. He sobs more reaching his own high rutting his cum inside you like it was routine. Like he had never been gone.

"Oh thank you baby... thank you." he sniffles rubbing your back and slowly pulling out shushing you as plays with your hair. You cradled his face and sniffled yourself kissing away his tears.

"Hi beautiful girl" He coos pressing another gentle kiss to your lips.

"Hey Clark" You were gasping for air and rest your head on his chest listening to his heartbeat.

"You hear that sweetie? She still races for you" He chuckles letting you pull on your shirt and underwear cleaning yourself up , he pulls on his own joggers before pulling you in for the deepest hug possible. He needed this... needed you.

"So... what does this mean for us" He asks afraid brushing your hair and refusing to let go in fear you're gonna disappear again.

"Clark... let's... one day at a time okay?" You sighed softly tracing patterns on his chest. You weren't saying no to him. And you weren't saying yes. He knew that and he respected it. All that mattered was right now you were back in his arms. The cat jinx had come over at some point and curled up by Clark it was just like the old days. Like a small family.

"Thank you truly for opening the door ... I... I don't know what I would've done if I didn't see you..I just needed to know you were okay.."

"I'm okay Clark.. always okay, and honestly you're lucky I didn't strike you" you offered a weak giggle burying your head in the crook of his neck.

"Really? With a hairdryer. You're gonna be the one who takes superman out with a hairdryer" He snorts gently kissing your temple and rubbing your back.

"Hey! I could do! It'll be the headlines for the next month!" You giggled heartily into the crook of his neck. He tightens him arms around you quickly lifting one hand to pet jinx.

"Would be an honour to be taken out by you with a hairdryer... very ....threatening honey" He snorts cradling you gently. He was at peace. He was home.

So when you finally fell asleep in his arms he takes just a moment to watch you sleep in his arms ... looking over at jinx and then back at you. He had the whole world in his arms.. and for once. Nothing else mattered.

UHM. HI. HELLO 🤗

This is my first kinda attempt with angst?? So lemme know what you think!!

Thank you as always for reading

@soggywhore @davidcoresnwet @madefrom-stardust