there is thunder in our hearts

       max  frowns,  unimpressed  with  this  guy's  lame  defense. ‘ you  know, ’  she  says,  ‘ i  don't  think  the  cops  are  gonna  buy  that. ’  red  hair  fans  out  a  little  as  she  leans  to  the  side,  the  spray  paint  can  partially  visible  behind  his  back  if  she  just  adjusts  how  she's  standing.  still––  max  has  never  seen  anyone  doing  graffiti  in  hawkins;  that  alone  merits  a  little  further  conversation. ‘ what're  you  painting? ’

 “oh, really?” she’s surprised by his answer. max has heard david bowie before, but she can’t remember anything that sounded quite like this. “yeah,” she says, still turning the song over in her mind, “it’s really cool. really different.”

Max would be content to go on hugging El forever. Finally, some comfort, something good–– the friend she’s needed all year. She tightens her hold when she feels El sobbing, and shakes her head vigorously. “You didn’t leave me,” she says, even if she doesn’t believe it. But it wasn’t El’s fault that they had to move. Hell, if Max could have gotten out of Hawkins with them, she’s pretty sure she would have gone in a heartbeat. “El, it wasn’t your fault.” El doesn’t say it, but Max knows her–– she feels guilty. 

sorry yall the add meds wore off and now its midnight i need to sleep

“ Well if you’re crying, then I’m gonna cry! ” Max protests, pulling Jane into the tightest hug she can muster. And true to her word, she lets out a little gasping sob, tears beginning to run down her own cheeks. “ I missed you so much. It sucked without you here. ” Max hasn’t even begun to think about what this all means–– the fact that El can only see her inside her own mind. She knows that Vecna nearly killed her, knows that while her mind might still function, her body is barely hanging on–– she in the real world, she lies comatose in a hospital room.

        max  nods,  reassured.   “  okay.  ”    and  as  an  afterthought,  “  thanks.  ”  she  still  feels  a  little  funny,  crashing  dinner  when  joyce  probably  wasn't  expecting  to  have  to  feed  an  extra  mouth,  but  she  nods  and  goes  to  the  cabinet  anyway.  “  stew  sounds  great,  ”   she  says,  padding  back  to  the  table  (  and  it   really  does  ) ,  “  thanks,  mrs. byers.  ”    it's  funnny,  max  normally  balks  at  authority;  a  byproduct  of  the  authoritarian  household  she's  been  living  in  for  so  long. but  she  feels  so  shy  around  the  people  she  affords  respect.  for  once,  she  actually  feels  like  a  kid;  feels  small,  protected.

      max relaxes as soon as she hears mike’s voice, slowly settling back into her bed. the smile she offers him is a little hollow, but it’s all she can muster right now.  ❝    hey.    ❞  ...good. this is good, someone good is here. losing her sight would have been hard enough without all this, but max can’t help but feel unsafe. she’s got one less way to protect herself against vecna now, one less warning system for when everything inevitably goes to shit. but from what lucas has told her, vecna is out of commission for a while. it’s not exactly the best news but it’s enough. it has to be. for now, she needs to focus on getting better. ( a lot of people have been telling her that, and she appreciates the sentiment, but she also can’t help but think that she can’t exactly make her bones heal with the power of positive thinking. ) normally, max isn’t optimistic about anyone’s ability to cheer her up–– but when mike says ‘i brought some food,’ she breaks into a grin. ❝   shut up, no you didn’t. oh my god, what is it?   ❞

Will had told Max that Joyce wanted to stop by and check on her. Ordinarily, she would have tried not to cry, but given everything that’s happened, she’d let it happen. She loves her mom, really she does. But Joyce has always represented a stability that Susan never quite got the hang of. So no, Joyce isn’t her mom, but Max can’t help feeling just a little bit safer when Joyce enters the room. “Hi Mrs. Byers,” Max says softly, assuming it is Joyce and not one of the nurses.

max fidgets in her hospital bed–– it’s not that she isn’t grateful to sam for coming here, it’s just... she thought she’d be more ready to hear about it. about vecna, the upside down, whatever the hell is happening to hawkins. but if there’s more to know, max needs to be ready. she’s working with a whole slew of setbacks now–– her whole life has been upended. she has to learn to navigate the world all over again, without her sight, without the strength she used to feel. no matter how scary it is, max will take anything that might make her stronger. “so... they said you, like... saw something? that you...” she swallows. “you were with vecna too.”

“i heard you guys kicked some wrinkly ass,” max says when she hears robin walk in. well–– it’s probably robin, anyway. the nurse on duty, carla, had come in and asked if she knew robin buckley. she supposes she doesn’t actually know the girl all that well, but she is definitely not saying no to any visitors. besides, robin is cool. and max wouldn’t mind hearing about vecna’s ass getting absolutely lit up. she’d woken up angry today, and as far as she can tell, angry is one of the better moods she can be in. it lights her up, makes her feel a little bit like her old self again. anything that keeps the hopelessness at bay, she’ll take.

    max shifts in her hospital bed when she hears the squeak of the door. “who’s there?” she asks, tone far more urgent than she’d like it to be. without her sight, she can’t help but feel that much more vulnerable–– coupled with the fact that she’s healing from four broken limbs, and still reeling from her second brush with vecna. but what else is new? they’re all fucked up now. she hopes that it’s someone from the party. one of the nurses had said something about a visitor today. she cranes her neck out of habit, turning her face towards the new arrival. if she can’t see, at least she can let them see her. if it’s that wrinkled freak or some government agent here to finish her off, then so be it.

so i'm just gonna make it canon that max is blind because like it doesn't make sense for her not to be. this, coupled with the absolutely insane amount of trauma she's gone through, bodily and otherwise, mean she's unfortunately gonna backslide a lot in terms of her progress emotionally. she will put on a brave face sometimes, but others she is really in bad shape. i do think it's possible for her to "see" el if/when el visits her mind, and vecna will be able to conjure images for her if he ever goes into her mind again. i'm also really interested in the idea of her and will sharing some kind of link given that they both like? had very intense experiences with the upside down/adjacent parties lmao. but anything max sees is a result of like signals being sent to her brain by some force other than her eyes. your muse can and should visit her in the hospital, during pt, help her around town, etc!