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My sister’s boyfriend is from Russia and he just graduated from college so his parents are visiting from Moscow and they speak very little English and I almost lost it today laughing because they absolutely loved my sister’s wiener dog like they were entirely amused by this dog and his dad was just sitting next to the wiener dog, admiring him, and softly saying in the thickest Russian accent “little dog….small dog….little dog”

I’m delighted you all enjoyed this

I just heard a girl outside yell “PARKOUR” really loudly immediately followed by a dull thud on the ground and a softer “ugh” and I’m laughing really hard

Maybe that person you called racist or homophobic or accused or being sexist is secretly breaking down inside. Maybe they’re crying as they see your hate. Maybe they have feelings just like you 

• Normalize going to Burger King at 3 am • Normalize falling asleep inside the Burger King • NORMALIZE filling up your empty milk jugs with drinks from the sofa fountain • NORMALIZE JACKING IT IN THE BK BATHROOM • NORMALIZE FIGHTING THE MANAGER

•NORMALIZE •FINDING •AND KILLING •THE BURGER KING

Bad day?

GREAT DAY

The best video ever posted on the internet is the scene from american psycho where they’re comparing business cards but someone edited it so they’re comparing like ridiculous forum signatures

where i want to see this

this is why aliens aint contact us yet cause they high as fuck

The most gentle meow.

THE FIRST MEOW SOUNDS LIKE IT’S SAYING “HELLO” I’M DYING