Chaotic butch

WRONG. egosyntonic ≠ incapable of self-reflection. we probably aren't going to seek out help for something that we don't see as wrong, except society is fucking amazing at punishing mentally ill people for their differences.

90% of these convos are being held by intersex people pointing out that the "basically male" and "basically female" associations of AMAB and AFAB in common lingo are ZERO reflection of someones anatomical and material reality. They are already coming with the weight that AMAB and AFAB are coerced assignments provided by an oppressive medical status quo, something we are ALL agreeing on.

pay attention when people opt to say "LGBTQA" instead of "LGBTQIA". pay attention when they say "LGBTQIA" but never actually mention their support for the 'I', especially if they're mentioning support for every other specific part of the acronym. pay attention when someone talks about the "LGBTQ community", mentions aspec folks as part of that community, but does not say a word about intersex people. pay attention when picrews have countless queer flags, including for every other letter of the acronym (and especially for other, more obscure identities), but does not include the intersex flag. notice when Etsy shops (and similar) do the same thing. especially when (both with picrews and with Etsy and similar) they include the version of the progress flag that does not include the intersex chevron.

pay attention when perisex people (both yourself and those around you) do talk about intersex people, and how and why they're talking about us. are they talking about us to support us, or are they talking about us to validate others (most notably, perisex trans & nonbinary folks)? do they ever talk about us to support us specifically? under what circumstances will they talk about us to support us? is it only when intersex people have asked them to, or will they do it of their own accord and without prompting, too? will they support us without prompting the same way they* support other queer folks without prompting, especially those whose identities they do not share? when talking about trans people, are they conscious of intersex trans people, or do their statements mostly or even only apply to perisex trans people (such as relying on an assumption of sex being binary, or the idea that all trans men could be considered FTM and all trans women could be considered MTF, or the idea that someone who is transitioning in a certain way or uses a certain label inherently has certain starting sex characteristics, or are using AGAB as shorthand to describe those same sex characteristics)?

If you're a transfem/woman, but you have to present as a cis man, you're still a butch.

If you're a transmasc/man, but you have to present as a cis woman, you're still a butch.

If you're genderqueer/nonbinary, but you have to present as a binary gender, you're still butch.

If you're intersex, but you have to present as perisex, you're still butch.

If you're a butch, but you have to stop dressing the way you want, or using the language you want, because your safety is on the line, you are still butch. [You are still butch.] No matter what. Butch is a noun, not a box.

I'm on the same boat, friends. My safety is already compromised by virtue of being black, fat, disabled, and a minor. I'm masculine, and my masculinity already puts me in a tight spot. If i have to stop using my preferred name and pronouns, to make sure I live long enough to be my true butch self in the future, I'll do it. It's hard, but we'll do what we have to to live.