Would you go back to the place that emotionally and mentally hurt you or not?
I said no, does it mean it is pride already?
Lately, my mama and my sister were trying to convince me to go back working at my first job. Since I had my papa currently working to that company, I am guaranteed to land a job opportunity at once.
I am currently having difficulty looking for a job due to the pandemic situation. Most of the jobs are on Metro Manila, and job opportunities here in my hometown are rare for my profession. Still, I prefer to stay in hometown and wait for an opportunity to less the risk, same as being with my family. Thus, my mama and sister were convincing me regarding going back to my first job since it is still in the area of my hometown.
I had my reasons why I never wanted to go back to that place:
I experienced a deep depression when I worked there, the place became one of the triggers for my mental illness
I wasn't really that motivated nor enjoying nor happy -- I just simply went to work just for money
Criticisms, not just from the your customers, but also from the employees of the different department of that company
Lack of manpower -- forced for a position you never wanted to, took all the responsibilities and fully blamed as well
Salary, hidden charges, unreliable system for inventory
Lastly, their idea of sales over professional service -- I wasn't able to fulfill my role as a professional, I don't even felt as a pharmacist at all.
To make it short, I wasn't happy at my first job, to the point that I blamed my father for forcing me to work there first. (Which is until now and will always regret that I had said those to my papa) No wonder, he wasn't convincing me to work again at his company. I could also remember I would always cry after every shifts, and asked myself, what kind of horror place I entered.
Although I am still thankful with the experiences it had given me, the skills I was able to develop to, and also had given me ideas to choose the right jobs to enter to.
So tell me, was it really my pride? Or am I being choosy, since we are in the midst of pandemic?