Charlie

Imagine The Fellowship all sitting around the campfire halfway up Caradhras retelling the events of the Hobbit to Boromir and Aragorn Rashomon-style with Gimli going "my dad tells it this way" and Legolas going "well, my dad tells it this way" and the Hobbits all going "but Bilbo tells it this way!" and, even though Gandalf was fucking there for half of it, he refuses to weigh in on anything because watching them argue is more fun and also he doesn't remember because it was over 75 years ago.

Even better: Gandalf remembers it perfectly fine but he keeps making shit up and agreeing to multiple different versions just to throw everyone off

[id: screencap of tags from tumblr user queenincheck, tag is "#gaslight gatekeep Gandalf" /id]

as someone with aragorn's kind of face framing layers i just know the front pieces are hanging in his eyes all day every day... "my path is hidden from me" you are 4 bobby pins away from utter clarity.

And when Aragorn becomes King Ellesar lo and behold! He has a proper haircut. He wears a crown that stops his hair falling in his eyes. He gets a wife who knows about bobby pins.

[lawyer voice] mothers and fuckers of the jury-

DO YOU KNOW HOW OFTEN I THINK ABOUT THIS POST??? IM IN LAW SCHOOL THIS POST IS GOING TO RUIN MY LIFE

reblog to ruin a law student’s life

Hi. I’m a trial attorney now and every last one of you is a motherfucker.