im a cat. the pfp is just my vibe. also mye

what about average naturals huh? some real home grown staple crop type of titty. it aint all trying to blue ribbon at the fair you know

As far as I’m concerned, all titties get the blue ribbon

that s not how the fair works

Oh yeah? Then I’m gonna make my OWN fair! With titty ribbons, and beautiful women

can i come to your fair it sounds cooler

mine just has all these fucking lettus andf carrots

(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,

inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.

can we focus on the gnome for a second

wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat

these are the people i have to share a highway with

the important thing to remember about corporations is that they are so so stupid

this post brought to you by my ex employer claiming that they can't have done disability discrimination against me because there's no proof I had PTSD in January 2025, although they do admit I had it both four months before and six months after that

asked my lawyer if this was the dumbest thing she'd ever seen and she gave me the ol' dead eyed stare that has watched a thousand civilisations fall

aborted abortion doctor: yea thats what i woulda did

it would suck being a new immortal. like it’d be 2109 and people would go, “what was it like seeing ancient civilizations rise and fall like that? seeing the pyramids being built? watching the expansion and growth of the new world?” and i’d just be like, “no…no i was born in 1991. so like, wow i’m gonna see some cool stuff, but, i mean i’m not that much older than just a really, really old person, you know? phones were big back then. so big. but only for like ten years, then they got like, as good as they are now. uh. rhinos existed. don’t think i ever saw one in person. cool, good talk.”

even worse, imagine being an immortal who keeps missing stuff. “What was it like seeing the pyramids being built?” “Fuck if I know, I was in Madagascar.” “Oh, okay. Well, how was the Renaissance?” “I fell down a hole in Scotland and people thought I was an enchanted well for four hundred years, it was over by the time I convinced someone to get me out.”

It’s been a decade since we left that comment and you have the best reply anyone’s left to it.

if you think about it, in their effort to be the least sexual cereal, cornflakes are actually the most sexual cereal, on account of the fact that most cereals are 0% concerned with sex in any way

fiction can be really dangerous there might be a deeply tragic woman in there who starts living in your head forever

hey if you’re stuck being in church this sunday here’s a reminder that it’s completely free to think about gay sex and no one can tell. the government doesn’t want you to know this but jesus thinks it’s totally cool

hey if you’re stuck being in church this sunday here’s a reminder that it’s completely free to think about gay sex and no one can tell. the government doesn’t want you to know this but jesus thinks it’s totally cool

i think it is important to recognize the ways in which your favorite thing sucks. i think it keeps u normal

man half of my mutuals are named some shit like Snooble at this point im doing some poob as bullshit in my life

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle