I Feel Like Soup

my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm

a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force

daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed

always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't

7. You can fold my daughter through any two points.

10. When two or more daughters are offered for a phenomenon, the simplest daughter is preferable.

11. Any sufficiently advanced daughter is indistinguishable from magic.

12. Without a clear indicator of intent, it is utterly impossible to parody my daughter without someone mistaking it for the genuine article.

* I had one within the hour!

* it was about an hour

* it was within the last few hours

* it was today

* it was within the last few days

* it was this week

* it was within the last few week

* it was this month

* it was within the last few moths

* it was a year or longer

* I’ve never eaten a burger

* see results