foggy fool

I didn't go through the bureaucratic process of changing my Norwegian personal ID number, which encodes gender in it, because having an odd number there made me feel bad.

I did it because for someone with my name and outward appearance, having "man" on my IDs reveals private medical information to everyone who sees the document, information that they aren't entitled to know, which they might act on in deeply undesirable ways.

Taking HRT also isn't something I'm doing to be affirmed, it's something I'm doing because the biological processes signaled by having high levels of estrogen and low levels of testosterone are both something I want, and something that helps my overall well-being and functioning in daily life. Material, real, physiological effects that are well understood, easy to look up, and not about some vague sense that putting estrogen in my bloodstream is a badge of validity handed out by the doctor.

Like at some point I just want to ask these people if they actually believe trans people exist or if they just feel obligated to humor the idea to be nice. Have they actually understood that there are people walking around today with the full effects of transition care already sorted? Have they comprehended that the surgeries exist beyond the occasional picture of someone who's still in recovery?

“That’s extremely selfish of you have you considered that maybe you deserve to be abused?”

and the post begins

because otherwise it gets kind of visually confusing to parse, which is annoying to some folks, including me

GRANTED not everybody uses the same theme or even the same update. you might have noticed my version of tumblr is earlier than yours (I don't like the new button setup)

but still, it's just about being polite

ace pilot: [raising her hand] okay so question

revolutionary leader: [sighing] what. what is your question

ace pilot: umm.. can i be leashed? i'm kinda missing my leash. whos my handler?

revolutionary leader: wh- you don't have a handler. you're a fucking mech pilot, you can be trusted to know the best course of action in battle, can't you? isnt this what they train you for?

ace pilot: [shaking her head] no i just do what they tell me to. i never got trained or anything they just inject me with the stuff and then tell me where to shoot. can i wear a muzzle

revolutionary leader: you never- what the fuck? THIS is what the best of the best of their army is like? you never even got trained?

revolutionary pilot: i told you working with her was a bad idea. lets just kill her. we don't need fascist scum in our ranks.

ace pilot: [whimpering a little] aahahaha.. can she be my handler? i like her

revolutionary leader: wh- what the fuck. you at least know how to pilot their mechs? right?

ace pilot: [grinning] if a scary lady is yelling at me, i can pilot anything in this galaxy

revolutionary pilot: we really dont need her. lets just shoot her

revolutionary leader: no no, wait.. anything? like all you need is a handler and you can pilot as well as any of their pilots

ace pilot: and a lot of drugs! but yep

revolutionary leader: . . . alright marsha you're her handler now

revolutuonary pilot: AW WHAT

handler: unfortunately it has to be a sex thing

pilot: aw MAN. can i still kill minorities and poor people

handler: 100%. with reckless abandon, even. but we are gonna have to touch you over it

handler: well. hmm. uh. about that. hm. look we'll hop you up on a ton of military grade drugs and like use weird hypno tech on you so you wont even be fully cognizant for all of it

second pilot: i guess thats not so bad

third pilot: [raising hand] this will still pay for my college degree right

handler: it will definitely pay for your college degree

handler: ohh yyeaaaaahhh absolutely no yeah this is all 100% justified don't worry

second pilot: wait they attacked us first? okay i dont have any reservations here this seems fine

third pilot: i'm just doing this to get my masters

first pilot: just to clarify i would do it either way. i just want to kill them

second pilot: you're kind of fucked up

first pilot: aren't we all though

handler: ok enough questions, to train you all ive bought our pilot with the most mech time out of her suit to teach you guys the basics

senior pilot: wh.. where is.. where is mmy skin,, wwh.. mmy.. where is.. ohgod,, mmy.. i'm,,, [staring at her hands] oh god what i have i done,,[reaches for the handler's gun and shoots herself in the head]