fluffy says

I’m actually concerned for boys who complain about how different girls look without makeup. Like did you think eyeshadow permanently alters a girls eyelid? Are you frightened when people change clothes

Babies have no concept of object permanence

That’s one of the sickest burns I’ve ever read. 

would like to add to this post and say that harry is uploading these videos to standard muggle youtube. people see this kind of scruffy, obviously Fucked Up kid rambling nonsense into his deskptop camera and just think he is really really good at shitposting

Hermione finds out about his channel because someone she went to primary school with posts it to Facebook and then she marathons his entire channel overnight to make sure he’s not going to get arrested for breaking the statute of secrecy

Hot Take: they can’t arrest him for jackshit because Hermione shows them Muggle memes and demonstrates that the Youtube audience legitimately has no reason to believe he’s anything but an elaborate shitposter.

@blackkatmagic These made me think of your Madatobi & kakaobi fics ♡

I watched this video like 5 times before reading the caption cause I thought I was having a stroke.

If my partner proposed to me in public or on my birthday I’d know they never actually listened to me

honestly? hannibal’s time management skills are incredible. somehow he has time to go to medical school twice, keep an active psychiatry practice, cook michelin-worthy five course meals every single day, have an active social life, go to the opera, maintain multiple properties, brainwash a hostage and keep her in a basement for three years, consult for the fbi, feed will’s dogs, frame will for murder, sleep, commit unique and artistic murders without leaving any evidence, and make cannibal puns. i don’t want to hear about how someone shoving a someone else into a horse is unrealistic. how does the fuck does hannibal do it. what’s his secret. 

bless the founders of urban dictionary bc without them i’d never know what you guys were talking about

He checked her pulse

my friend and i were on arts and craft shop to buy supplies and there were shelves of empty boxes that has different shapes and sizes and we were fooling around and reenacting harry getting his first wand and i was playing ollivander and keep pulling out elongated slim boxes and pretending they have wands inside and then there were boxes that are handwoven dried leaves so naturally i went what if these must be the wand boxes if you’re an asian wizard getting their first wand and i opened it aND WE RELEASED A REALLY LOUD GASP BC THERE WAS A  WAND INSIDE AND FOR A MOMENT THAT REALLY FELT MAGICAL AND TOTALLY AWESOME UNTIL WE REALIZED IT’S A WOODEN CALLIGRAPHY PEN

Today you‘ve heard someone mention soulmate-flowers in a song. Confused you turn to your soulmate, asking what that means. They look at you worried and a bit dumbfounded. „The flowers you start to see, when you are around your soulmate“, they explain slowly. You have never ever seen these flowers as far as you can remember.

shout out to the older woman in the snack aisle at walmart who just answered her phone and snapped “i’m in an important meeting, what do you want?”