someone (maybe luca haas) makes a post (tiktok) in 2015 may-june about kissing shane hollanders picture before exams for good luck, bc mtl won cup, he makes a follow up post about aceing all exams thanks for hollzy. it goes semi viral.
someone (ilya/marly) sees it, finds it funny. they bring a hollander poster to their next game, and they kiss it for good luck in the locker room before the game. they crush the opposing team.
and it happens on their very next game against the voyageurs.
bc every hockey player is deeply deeply superstitious the bears implements kissing the hollzy poster as their pregame ritual. someone has to do it before every game. they make a roster.
one guy doest do it bc hes a homophobe. they lose even tho it wasnt a hard game, but everyone was rattled bc some asshole didnt kiss the hollzy poster, and they only found out on the ice. like, they lost with kissing the poster too, but now they lost bc he DIDNT kiss it.
the next game ilya was standing next to the hollzy poster, and only let the players leave the locker room and step on ice after they kissed the poster.
marly gets injured? has to sit out a game for some reason? and hes bored. and they are playing against mtl. so he tweets out
'someone tongue hollander in my name. you guys all need that'
ilya naturally is in hes demon era so he answeres
'done brother. this win is ours'
and then, this goes VIRAL viral. everyone asks questions about this from both team, shane obv panics, his teammates r trying to defend him. boston is just full of gremlins and they are just giving criptid answers.
scott comments bc he doesnt want to be left out of gay hockey history
'i thought cars would fly sooner than the whole boston team coming out'
ilyas answer 'i thought cars would fly sooner than dino playing hockey. is you. you are dino playing hockey. retireee'
maybe hayden 🤮 posts something insulting them. like 'shane has better taste then to kiss anyone from boston'
marly answers bc he has the time bc hes not playing in this game 'maybe if you'd get off of your wife for a second you'd kiss hollander too. its nit about his taste but what his mouth can do'
or some insane shit like that.
BOS@MTL (5:2) embarrassing lose for mtl. shane was in shambles. ilya was on his A game.
obv after this, the boston pr team puts out a video showing the players kissing the hollander poster before a lot of games. the poster changes every once in a while, when shane does another ad. midway thru the vid, it switches up from only showing one player giving a quick peck, to the whole team lining up to kiss the poster.
it becomes a trend. everyone is tweeting about kissing their hollander poster before big things.
ilya jokes every opportunity he gets, that before their next game against each other hes gonna tongue hollander for real, to have ultimate luck
years pass. ilya plays for ottawa. when the fanmail vid drops, everyone assumes he just went thru with it
shane signs with ottawa too. ende gut alles gut.
/alternatively mtl kinda distances themselves from hollzy bc of this kissing thing. then he feels like hes drowning in the locker room, and ilya invites him to bbq/team night (bc hes an honorary bear with being in their locker room as a poster)/drink at someones house(?) with the boston team
he goes, and at the end of the night the first guy who goes home just goes "bye guys, ill head home to my wife. behave urselves." he gives bro hugs to a bunch of people, hugs a few, and pecks shane when he leaves. no one finds it weird other than shane, who is spiraling. he is afraid that the guy clocked him.
then the next guy decides to go home and on his way out he pecks him too on his cheek.
and every guy who leaves, leaves a kiss on his face.
then shane goes and starts playing for boston
they soft lauch fr fr (only for teammates tho)
shane realizes how shitty friend hayden was.
they play until they retire and have like a 5 season cup winning streak - their winnign streak only ended bc they adopted a kid, and one of them always stayed off of the ice to take care of the kid.
seeing this opportunity everyoen was hard trying for the 3-4 years that they are out. and boston lost all 3-4 times. but made playoffs.
when the kid got older and could be left with the grandparents and aunty sveta and aunty rosie they started winning again. not every game, they got old-ish-er, but they did still win a freakishly lot.
jackie divorces hayden, moves in with hollanov and rosveta in a queer commune. happy ending.
