fuckin whatever

Me, pointing to the mirror: Do NOT become The Joker about this. This isn’t even a Condiment King situation.

Two animals who appreciate the Warm Lamp

there are places in the world today that are experiencing 40°C for the first time in recorded history. of course there's no way to know whether chucking billionaires into volcanos will appease the sun god but i feel we're doing the scientific method a disservice if we don't at least try

If I were a murderer, and I'd meticulously planned a murder, and then I turned up at the place to do the murder and found that world-famous-murder-solver Hercule Poirot was also there, I would simply not do the murder.

girl who had it ingrained into her that letting other people help her was a moral failing for being a burden: "no yea i'm fine, just going through a rough patch but i'll pass eventually just like it always does ^_^"

Wake up babe, new meta layer just dropped

knowing how it tends to go with male authors and their wives it was probably marge who wrote the odyssey