*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

I think the reason I still enjoy tumblr is that even though this all still pisses me off, I know that anything that makes me mad on here is 100% earnest. It's not ragebait or engagement farming, y'all are actually just that stupid sometimes

I think people would be less suicidal if they were allowed to talk about being suicidal without risk of being sent to the Torture Dungeon

hate when I type :) and this 🙂 fucker appears. Go away you evil soul

E—m—d—a—s—h—N—e—c—k—l—a—c—e

Y—o—u—P—e—o—p—l—e—W—i—l—l—R—e—b—l—o—g—A—n—y—t—h—i—n—g

needs an em-dash at the beginning and/or end, otherwise the first or last letters will be right next to each other

϶—F—r—i—e—n—d—s—h—i—p—B—r—a—c—e—l—e—t—ϵ

϶—C—U—R—S—E—D—A—M—U—L—E—T—ϵ

Cursed amulet necklace that doesnt have a cursed amulet its just the phrase cursed amulet

϶—C—U—R—S—E—D—(¤)—A—M—U—L—E—T—ϵ

ok just to recap they lost the antichrist in S1 they lost the archangel gabriel in S2 and now they lost jesus??? omg these guys can't do anything

the reason I casually say charlie kirk's wife had him killed is not necessarily because I believe it, but because nothing stops the right from spouting random conspiracy theories about political enemies, so i'll say whatever the hell I want when one of their idols dies. also it's funny. the entire charlie kirk death is inherently funny. he was in the middle of answering a question related to mass shootings when he died.

men and women are not opposites. men and women are not enemies. men and women are two parts of a broad coalition which fights against a mutual enemy: inkjet printers

(Smugly after failing at a task) and they said it could be done.

i'm having a bad day. someone is going to die today (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) and it's not going to be me. (gets scared someone will report me to the police) people around the world die of natural causes every day. (remembers i want people to think i'm smart) and i know who it's going to be (remembers i want to retain an air of mystery) but i'm not telling.