First World Flight Problems

I just want some fucking consistency. Don't let me in one day w two people and the next day without. Ya'll acting like a big fat c***

When you don't realize that you have to be ticketed in a certain group with status to get a paid for upgrade..

Talk about new money basic.

Seriously, why the fuck did you let me into PHX, LAX and out of LAX w that bottle of hot sauce only to take it away this time? The liquid has only decreased. Either you're all fucking idiots that cannot deliver your job with consistency or you're all fucking idiots that cannot deliver your job with consistency.

I would just like to, just one time, get on an American Airlines plane where it isn't completely decrepit. I'm embarrassed for you American!

Seriously, if the flight attendant says the bag doesn't fit then it doesn't fit

When someone wants to make you wait because they don't understand the boarding rules. I'm sorry that your code share partner decided to grant me Sapphire status. Your planes are garbage as it is. So can I just get to my garbage seat already?

Between Global Entry and Global Access. Yes all of us in group 1 are totally judging your ass!

Who clearly are not frequent fliers

Who is 'Instagram famous' takes a the out of the window airplane wing photo... I know they're sitting in Economy. :|

The weird feeling of not boarding first on this flight.

The flight isn't sold out And due to weight issues the airline offers 5 people $700 for you to fly tomorrow And there is a visibly overweight person in the seat in front of you

What can be worse than showering in the lounge and the hair dryer deciding to commit an inconvenient suicide.

The hot head who believes he has a 'right' to having his cabin bag exactly above his seat. Sir, you're flying economy. You gave up all your rights when you decided you'd cheap out on your flight to Gatwick.

Oh, how I have forgotten what it is like to fly peasant class without any status. 

Even when I try to fly economy. They upgrade me to first.