ᯓ i'm so green ᯓ

genuinely i wish a giant anvil would fall out of the sky and onto the vegas golden knights

the fortune teller just drew the ten of pregnant werewolves card, which could mean nothing,

A truthberry might make you tell the truth... But a lieberry? A lieberry will loan you books

The thing is nobody at pride is evaluating you to determine if you’re queer enough to be there because they’re too busy thinking “it’s so hot out” and “why is this lemonade 12 dollars?”

they're selling anti-ai slogans on sweatshop-produced t-shirts. i don't need to write the poem for you to get it do i

always a little funny to me when filmbros are vehemently anti fanfiction but love to discuss film theories. Maybe my theory is that the 2 main guys sucked each other off. And swallowed

"i've got no qualms about it" meanwhile i'm over here making qualm chowder

Lindy losing the Jack Adams race by 3 points makes me catatonic actually

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

I’m ready to be transformed by the ibuprofen . I’m ready to be born again in its purifying light.

I think the "pre" and "post" parts in "preposterous" should cancel each other out but everyone else seems to find my idea completely erous

dahlin 4 norris campaign postponed to next year. you did well my sweet captain