i get why people don't believe in marriage as a social construct but legally it is the best and easiest way to say "this is who i trust to take care of me when i can't take care of myself" and i'm so glad gay people fought for that right bc when shit gets scary at least i know im in good hands

guy who's having gauzy idealized wife flashbacks for the whole adventure but it turns out she isn't dead or anything he just really misses her and wants to get home

Daddy likes Free shipping

i think being proud of where you come from is one of those things that becomes fun the more specific you get. like "proud to be english" bad rancid vibes. makes you sound like the kind of person who rants about immigrants. "proud to be from yorkshire" better vibes. i cannot deny the yorkshire cultural heritage. "proud to be from pocklington" absolutely fucking hilarious please never let anybody kill your pocklington pride.

MY guardian angel jacks off to me while i sleep

god didn't give me a dick because he knew I'd get hard when I heard a rich choral harmony

divorced, broke, nosebleeds, tv show cancelled, recruited into a cult…. but he was using his curl cream

my oubliette doesnt even work right anymore every so often some piece of shit just fucking climbs out