fiferona

i'm not dying on this hill, I'm killing you on it actually.

As a kid, I wasn’t allowed to touch the hot stove with my bare hands. But now I get to do it whenever I want

I think the "pre" and "post" parts in "preposterous" should cancel each other out but everyone else seems to find my idea completely erous

im the person they keep adding gratuitous & unnecessary violence & sex in movies for. im running every studio executive ragged asking for even more cock & gore in cinema they simply cant keep up

[the most low energy you have ever seen me] we’re about to go crazy mode

happy june everybody i hope you get fucked and/or sucked this month

what if we don't wanna be?

Uhhhh let me be queer

doctor just prescribed me music really loud

i think when u clean your house it should stay clean forever. what do u mean i have to do it again

Bro this coffee cake is lowkey cumming in my ass right now

I don't think so

*getting really defensive* I’m literally getting cummed in by it right now

Hey. You probably don't recognize me but... you showed up in my notes once (1 time) and well, heh, your funny username caught my eye.... Can I come in your house