You're a lifesaver!

What is Wheatley then

proud victim of the tumblr accent. it's fading out of public consciousness as the tik tok accent takes precedence; a linguistic evolution that makes the tumblr accent 85% funnier to unsuspecting civilians. it's like releasing a disease on a non-inoculated population. coughing baby versus hydrogen bomb.

I love it when people respond to witnessing some tomfuckery before noon with "it's [time] in the fucking morning" like it's too early to be witnessing some ridiculous nonsense. As if the bullshit has a schedule, can't start hijinks before five o' clock. Them people doing bicycle jousting with umbrellas at 7 am have been at it for 5 hours now.

i have a private pinned post that just has a link to this dashboard on it, it's great. two dashboards for life

I swear if the link in the original post is a virus I'll be so upset.

For fucks sake Tumblr, tell people about the features of your broken ass website.

children are so fucking funny man. i just overheard a kid go “i just learned a new way to pinch, wanna see it? it hurts a lot more!” followed by a loud, notably pained scream

"Summon ketamine ape is a banned spell" fuck it fine whatever, I summon a normal gorilla. I summon some ketamine.

To be quite honest with you all I do think that aro/ace-spectrum fans in fandoms where people are desperately inventing crossover ships and humanizing non-human characters in order to have a conventionally attractive guy to ship the main character with, instead of possibly having to enjoy a story with no romance in it, have the right to refer to everyone else as cowards.

Sorry you almost had to entertain the idea that people like me exist, I'm sure that was very painful for you.

characters overextending themselves when using magic until they start bleeding from their nose/ears/etc >>>>>>

Happy pride