Arden

Arden ☆ 20 ☆ He/him

Trans Panromantic Asexual

My card

Obsessed with Marauders, Dead Poets Society, I Saw the TV Glow, Grishaverse, All For The Game, Arcane, Marvel, Daredevil, BTVS and Heartstopper

I kin Regulus Black, Kaz Brekker, Jean Moreau, Todd Anderson, Loki, both Charlie and Tori Spring, Marcus Baker, Chandler Bing and Viktor Hargreeves

Taylor Swift and David Bowie >>>

Also love Gracie Abrams, Olivia Rodrigo, Noah Kahan, Maisie Peters, Chappell Roan, Gigi Perez, Ethel Cain, Hozier, Billie Eilish, Phoebe Bridgers, Conan Gray, Yungblud, Jessie Murph, Leanna Firestone, NF, Citizen Soldier, Fleetwood Mac, Queen, Rini K and many more

Marauders fanfic writer, go check out my AO3

Fuck JKR!!! Anti Gen AI!!!

Remus always thought he would be alone forever, ever since his father started shying away from his touch, the guilt he feels for his role in the attack evident in their every interaction, and the way his mother looked at him with so much pity, constantly teary-eyed. He knew that what happened to him would change the entire trajectory of his life, and by eight years old, he accepted the inevitable. That people would be too prejudiced and afraid of him, or disgusted by his scars, to want to be friends with him. That the only people who would ever truly know and care about him are his parents. Not that Remus really minded that fact, he loves them wholeheartedly, but he couldn’t help but feel as though something was missing, and he didn’t know what. 

Until he went to Hogwarts, eternally grateful for Dumbledore to allow someone like him to attend the school, and met three amazing young boys. Three boys who he shared a dorm with, who he pulled pranks with, who he talked with while eating chocolate, all squished on one bed, until they threw up from all the sugar. Remus found what he was missing all his life—his people, his family, his home. 

But there was a gnawing sensation in the pit of his stomach telling him that this wouldn’t last, that his friends were too good, that he did not deserve them. And oh, how right he was. Remus should be grateful for the seven years in heaven he got with them. The life expectancy for someone with his affliction is short, and he always expected to be the first of the four to die. He poured everything he had into protecting the people he loves when they were fighting in the war, but it wasn’t enough. He wasn’t enough. He wasn’t good enough to protect them; he wasn’t good enough to save them. He failed. He failed the people he cared about most in the world. Marlene, Dorcas, James, Lily, Peter. All dead. They should have been the ones to live long, fulfilling lives. They should have been the ones to survive, not Remus. It was never supposed to be Remus. 

How could he possibly live knowing he couldn’t save them? How could he possibly live knowing that the person he loves most, the person he shared a bed with every night and whom he wanted to spend his life with, is the reason for all this tragedy? How could he possibly live knowing he did nothing to stop him? And how could he ever possibly live when he still loves that man after everything he has done?