love pigeons and their city girl swag

"if mushrooms are the superior lifeform that really calls the shots on this earth, why haven't they destroyed us yet?" listen to yourself. have we as humans gotten rid of every mountain on the planet just because we are smarter than big rocks? no!! because they don't pose a threat to us. sure some people die rock climbing or skiing and that's tragic but mountains aren't dangerous to us as a global society. do you see where i am going with this. it's your misplaced hubris that makes you think that humankind is worth destroying to a mushroom. we are a part of the mundane landscape on the surface. we pose no threat to the mycelian era. humble yourself

Hi! Librarian here. Did you know that [attacks you with a sword] [attacks you with a sword] [rolls away] [attacks you with a sword] [rolls away] [casts spell of stab you with knives] [attacks you with a sword]

CLAIMS TO BE LOYAL TO THE END. BITES THE HAND ANYWAY.

GETS BITTEN. CONTINUES TO HOLD OUT A TENDER HAND (IN ITS PALM A SOFT AND LOVING HEART) NONETHELESS.

“i can fix her” “i can make her worse” oh yeah well i’ve lived my whole wretched life at her mercy, hers alone, and god knows i deserve to die at her hand. she is my only friend. i am undone without her

Booby traps? Sure, I would easily fall into a trap if I saw boobs

my favourite ever literary trope is “you want me to be a villain? i’ll show you a villain” that shit gives me goosebumps and given the right context also turns me on

#the tiger…he destroyed his cage… yes… YES…. the tiger is out

“Everyone is a monster to someone. Since you are so convinced that I am yours. I will be it.”

i am EVIL!!! no I don't want to join your found family please go away,,

I'm literally pointing a death lazer at you

*sobs*

stop asking about my dad

& I can run around on all fours but I don’t

[on date] *winks flirtily* and btw i am soooo haunted by the ghosts of my past mistakes and how preventable their consequences were. do you want me carnally