unwritten and undefined

This diarrhea feel like I'm on that pre-colonoscopy meds that clear you out. This is awful.

Aaaannndddd I need to find the number to make an appointment. I told my mom how bad my GI problems are/getting worse, and she said I needed to go back to see the GI lady. Don't really want to go cause I have a feeling they gonna give me endoscopy and colonoscopy again and both of those were awful. And I need to find time to go to my primary doc to get tested (again) for hypothyroidism. I've had most of the symptoms for years, but over the past few months, I've had the large weight gain :/

Everything is on fire. It hurts so bad. I want to die. I'm so hot. My insides hurt. I'm nauseated. Oh god this is awful.

I can literally feel the part of my small intestine spasming. This is awful. This hurts so much and it simultaneously feels like I need to vomit and shit. Because it's right after my duodenum that's spasming, so it feels like I need to vomit, but I can feel that it's currently spasming around nothing, and I know that most of my food has moved through most of my small intestine at this point, so that makes me feel like I need to shit. This is awful. I hate this. It's increasing how often this happens. I want to call my gastro nurse/doc/medical professional lady, but I'm afraid she's gonna make me do the endoscopy and colonoscopy again and I don't have the time or energy to do that, and it was an awful experience and I kinda just want to not right now.

Lol I've been up almost all night because of my insides hurting. Totally love feeling like I'm constipated even tho I had diarrhea today :^)

lololololololol I've noticed I only come onto here anymore when my IBS becomes hellish....aka rn bc I gave myself a headache from trying to go to the bathroom so hard to stop this stomach pain that's making me get up every 5 minutes from thinking I'm gonna vomit/shit myself lololololololol