I don't think it's a procrastination thing, but an insecurity thing. They're not asking if it's acceptable on like legal or moral ground. They're asking if it's something that won't get them made fun of, or yelled at. Likely because they read/heard an author they look up to say something like "If your fantasy has elves and dwarves in it then quit writing now". They're making a bid for empathy in the hopes of drumming up the confidence to write that thing they feel stupid for wanting to write imo
You're right imo. AND you actually hit on what I'm getting at!
I realize the go-to explanation for most weird things people do is "anxiety and depression". But now that that's common sense, my contrarian ass yearns to reframe it into something actionable.
On some level, most people asking "is it okay to do X in fantasy writing? Is it okay to like X in the privacy of my own home? Is it okay to think X in my brain?" already know what the answer is. They're externalizing it for some other reason. Confidence, like you said. Or because it's hard to pull themselves away from socmed to write, so they make being on socmed about writing.
Let's be real, creative "rules" are all just suggestions. I've shrugged at so much art advice that didn't match what my peers or my idols were doing. Or I looked at the person who made the "rule" and knew they had no authority. I've seen art that I think is amazing get forgotten or critically-panned, and I've seen art that I don't understand at all get lifted higher than heaven. Hell, there's tons of advice saying not to shade with black and not to use adverbs and I still do both of those all the time. None of it matters. People clearly love elves. The only real rules are that you know how to be interesting and that you know how to spell. And spelling is optional, really. Do whatever you want forever.
Reading a bunch of rules in the first place can easily become procrastination, in my personal experience. For this new wave of "may I"s, they're asking a public forum because it's fun to scroll and talk and get reassuring messages from strangers. I wouldn't go to Reddit for art advice because I don't know who those people are (and I'm not looking to get glazed for doing nothing)! Most people on there are beginners talking shop for the same reasons, stuck in theory stasis or making really average stuff. The people who really get cool stuff done are barely online at all, haha.
Having grown up in the "lurk moar" kind of internet, I genuinely don't think insecurity will ever be cured by 8 anonymous users typing the same "There's nothing wrong with that, there's no such thing as an original thought, your voice is unique, spread your wings" boilerplate.
Self-esteem is being reported as low NOT because there aren't enough pithy slogans around. It's low because 1) there are so few opportunities to matter in our communities right now, and as a result, 2) people sit and think about themselves constantly.
What a lot of us need is for the crowd to say "you're procrastinating" and make the inertia the problem.
I mean, I don't necessarily think you're wrong, but I don't think that's a particularly useful or empathetic way of approaching the problem. Like, sure it's true, but when someone leads with some measure of vulnerability by asking for a bit of compassion, hitting them with "You're procrastinating, now get off social media and write" is... kind of cruel imo?
Like, I can't speak for anybody but myself, but I rarely ever talk about my general insecurities, reservations, or misgivings when it comes to making art. A lot of the reason why is because in the few instances I have I usually get met with "Just do it". Which like, true, but also it's really hard to walk away from that kind of encounter and not feel like I was told to just fuck off. It's hard for me to relate to other artists because there seems to be this general air of our standing being related directly to what we produce and display for an audience, and by not just doing that then I'm failing at being an artist. So it's just easier to say nothing than it is to throw my hat into the arena knowing that I'm going to be treated like a nuisance because I can't just flip the switch on my brain's confidence machine and be the Good Artist that I ought to be.
It's just... a really flippant way to approach an issue that people clearly care a lot about. We all talk endlessly about how our community needs uplift one another. But the moment someone in that community is struggling to start, the best advice we have is "Fuck off, make shit"? I don't know if I can get behind that. We all know emotional struggles aren't something you can just overcome through sheer gumption. Why is it then when the discussion involves art our only recourse is to tell people to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, and become a content mill?
It may be true, but it all just feels heartless to me.
@psshaw :
Nah I getcha. Full disclosure, my attitude on this comes from having been run ragged by stalled development and inappropriate appeals to pity when dealing with 20-somethings. Which I assume is most of the people asking for permission, since as you noted we don't really think to do that. I have long since hit a breaking point from corralling people who I know have loving support systems, but who act helpless because they fully KNOW to appeal to "empathy". I don't think it's worth going into detail, but I can't afford to assume everyone needs an infinite "bit of compassion" anymore. We also need to be conscious that not everyone fully -wants- to overcome some things. Understanding is only motivating sometimes! Having stuff thought or taken care of you can be fun! (And its a growing fetish community.) Your experience with art is alien to me, as I think we've touched on before-- but I'm really not sure what help you with "starting" as related to the worldbuilding question post. Would reddit help you? What kind of uplifting words would do it? Or are you interested more in someone complimenting what you already did, so you feel motivated to do more? Is there a solution in sight, or is it just "no, not that one"?
So years ago I really struggled with trying to write. I didn't have a massive list of books to pull from. My school's library was small, my dad didn't really buy me books, and even as an adult I struggle to find stories I can stomach reading. Too many 15 chapter introductions, female characters pontificating on whether or not it's rape if she enjoys it, etc. This makes my reference material for a Good Story pitifully small. Mostly pared down to whatever video games I could afford on whatever allowance I could scrounge up from doing yard work.
When I eventually started looking online I found myself even more confused. Authors would talk about characters living in their heads. The author didn't dictate the story, the characters did, and the author was just ~there for the ride~. It was so alien to me because I didn't have that, and I didn't understand what they were saying. And if it wasn't that it was Youtube essayists talking about wants, needs, ghosts, specific ensemble casts, etc. Shit that felt less like writing a story, and more like writing a 90 minute movie or serialized TV pilot. So I floundered.
Then I talked to a friend who introduced me to a woman who works as a nurse, writes books, and edits on the side. She talked about story in terms of what a scene is meant to accomplish. She boiled the entire story building process into "A story is game where you ask yourself questions, and then you answer them". My friend and I then sat for a bit while he asked me questions, and I answered them. He also had a story (though he was actually writing his), and I asked him questions in turn. That shit was what I needed. It got me thinking about what was relevant to my story, and what questions I wasn't asking. I sat down and spent a couple hours filling in like ten pages of story outline notes, scenes that I had in mind, shit like that. It motivated me to write because it gave me the tools needed to understand what a story even IS.
I think, to a large extent, that's the part that gets people tripped up. They put all this effort into world building, and they never go anywhere with it because they're focusing on things irrelevant to the core narrative. Not because they want to procrastinate, but because they don't know what kinds of questions they need to start asking. It's like trying to draw without knowing shapes. Sure you can mimic what you see and render the fuck out of some skin tone, but you need that core established first.
And yeah some people are absolutely just exploiting empathy for pity points. Again, you're not wrong. But I wonder how many of them there are in relation to those who aren't? And like I'm going to needle you for specifics. It sounds like you got burned a lot, which I can totally understand. But if I didn't have even that little bit of context then, again, the only thing I'd glean from "You're procrastinating" is you telling me to fuck off. And I don't exactly think I'd be in the wrong for taking that way.
There's someone I talk to on an infrequent basis who has done art tutoring before, and she remarked that teaching is its own different skillset. One that artists, generally speaking, are absolute dogshit at. Too often do we forget to pass along critical information, instead opting to teach others in the ways we think we would have preferred. I think these two are related. We're dogshit at actually teaching others because we assume that being able to make art is all one needs to teach it, so we never work on teaching skills, leading to frustration from everybody when we're all talking past each other.
I can't say I know for sure what would definitively help. But I feel like maybe if we met those questions less like problems that need to be solved, and more like bids for patience then maybe we'd have better success? Like the next times someone asks "Is it OK if my story does/has X" answer back with "Why wouldn't it?" or "Is X a necessary part of the narrative?" You know things that less give a definitive answer, and more guide the questioner to start answering for themselves.
Not that I can attest to that working for anybody but myself, of course.
