bloobluebloo

I think some people might think I'm trying to be some sort of debbie downer when I say that I hope that Ganondorf never expresses any romantic interests canonically. The thing is that, if he ever does, it will never be what you want it to be, based on the history of the character over 40 years. Let's take a look at Bowser, for example. Bowser historically has done some things with Peach that can be deemed "problematic", like kidnap her and try to force her to marry him, but these sort of incidents are always done with a sort of whimsical/humorous edge to it so it doesn't feel as problematic. On the other hand, Bowser is also shown to have loveable qualities like being a father and his children loving him, and being a goofball. He is the face of Nintendo's parental control videos as well. So, even if Peach doesn't love him back, his love for her is more of a gag than anything else really, and he is written in such a way that you wouldn't imagine him really wanting to harm her. Ganondorf, on the other hand, is marketed as Nintendo's imposing and scary villain (and I guess sexy villain now as well). Ganondorf's inherent quality is oppression. I have said before that the Gerudo being created as his tribe of origin and being exclusively women was not done without intention; it serves to demonstrate how oppressive he is. This was demonstrated by the visceral reaction many had in AoI when watching a bunch of women bow to him as his subjects, even though Rauru similarly has his subjects bowing for him. If he were to express any romantic interest, it would serve as a vehicle of manipulation and oppression based on what his character has been for the past 40 years. Of course this isn't to say that romantic interest in that vein can't be interesting in any way, but Nintendo is also committed to not telling very deep stories and also telling very "family-friendly" stories so any romantic exploration in this vein will inevitably fall flat and come off as very tasteless. This is one of those instances where I believe fanon will always be better than whatever canon can come up with, and if canon does come up with something it becomes this huge ugly elephant in the room that is very difficult to ignore. So cheers to Ganondorf expressing zero romantic interest in canon. May you forever be enamored with power and doing very weird things to your body in pursuit of it.

Thinking about Ganondorf again, as one does. I don't think it's unfeasible that he is able to be charming and seductive when it comes to intimate moments, but I do feel like it would come from the same place his threatening and grandiose monologues come from. Ganondorf is great at putting on the act with the accompanying drama and flair because he believes himself to be the king that will rule over all, and I think this in turn makes it difficult for him to be sincere with himself and his actual feelings. I think sincerity would make him feel and act incredibly awkward and thus he avoids it when he can. Case in point, Ganondorf laughing maniacally after one punching Sonia; that absolutely came from a place of sincerity and boy was that awkward for all involved.

When it comes to Ganondorf and portraying his evil, I think it's very important to understand that there is whimsy to his evil, the whimsy that is inherent to LoZ as a franchise. Ganondorf thought the pinnacle of evil was to title himself "the GREAT King of Evil" and then installed an organ at the top of his super evil tower so that he could play his own theme song while Link approached him. He suspended his super evil tower over a LAVA pit that is only accessible by rainbow bridge. He argued with a tree and cursed it because it didn't give him what he wanted. He quite possibly forged a note from a zora princess and put it in a bottle and tossed it into the lake with hope and a prayer. His plan to kill the queen of Hyrule with a super powered magic stone was to neutral jab her and hope her spine was made out of paper. He thought it would be exceptionally evil to control Yunobo by making him wear a luchador mask and matching costume. He scared away Zelda's horse because he could. Like he is evil sure but he is also exceptionally cringe and I love that for him.