lana x

as maid of honour, alessia had thrown herself into the role with typical determination, spending most of the day darting between responsibilities, fixing last-minute problems, and making sure everything ran perfectly for her best friend.

so while you were technically there together, you’d spent most of the wedding catching glimpses of your blonde girlfriend across the venue rather than having her by your side.

but you’d made your own entertainment, speaking to ella’s extended family and some of alessia’s teammates and now you had survived exactly four hours of ella's wedding before realising two things.

one: weddings were far more emotional than you'd expected.

and two: alessia russo in a tailored bridesmaid dress should probably be illegal.

you were stood near the edge of the reception venue, drink forgotten in your hand, completely distracted as alessia laughed across the room with some of the other bridesmaids.

she looked ridiculous. never in a bad way but in a devastatingly good way.

her hair curled perfectly and softly away from her face, gold jewellery catching under the lights, cheeks pink from laughing too much all day.

you genuinely couldn't stop staring. next to you, one of ella's cousins who you had been in conversation with before you got distracted had noticed immediately. "you're gone for her, aren't you?"

you blinked, not hearing exactly what they had said. "hm?"

the woman grinned knowingly. "you haven't looked at anything else in twenty minutes."

you glanced back toward alessia just in time to catch alessia already looking at you too. immediate eye contact, an immediate loving smile like it was instinct now.

you felt your chest tighten helplessly. "yeah," you admitted softly, with a knowing smile. "just a bit."

the whole day had felt warm. not just because of the summer weather, the endless champagne or the fairy lights wrapped around the outdoor reception.

just... emotionally warm.

ella had teared up during the ceremony. alessia had cried during ella's vows. half the team had cried because of they were watching their good friend take the next step in life.

not that you would ever admit it aloud but you had spent most of the ceremony watching alessia instead of the actual bride. but hey, who could blame you.. that was your girl.

because every time alessia smiled at ella from beside her at the altar, you caught this tiny glimpse of what alessia would look like on her own wedding day.

and honestly? that thought alone nearly finished you off.

then came the speeches. joe's best man's was chaotic. her mum's was emotional. and alessia's...

you thought she might actually combust halfway through it. you watched her spent nights writing it and rewriting. asking her if she'd give you a sneak peek of what she had written but her claiming it was strictly off limits until the big day.

so watching alessia stand there clutching cue cards with shaky fingers trying so hard to keep composure while talking all things ella and their friendship was so refreshing.

about growing up together. about football. about friendship.

and then she got emotional halfway through. voice wobbling slightly. you watched her laugh through tears while ella cried across the room, and suddenly everyone else disappeared for a second.

but you couldn't stop thinking: "god, i want this forever."

not even with the whole fuss of a wedding necessarily. just alessia. always.

when the time came around for the reception starting and winding down properly, most people had migrated back inside to dance.

you had found yourself at the bar mostly by accident.

the dancefloor had become chaos about twenty minutes earlier after somebody convinced half the guests to attempt some awful coordinated dance routine, and you had escaped before you got dragged into it.

the venue glowed warm around her fairy lights overhead, music humming through the room, people laughing loud enough to echo off the walls.

it was nice. really nice.

"oi."

you turned just in time to see ella appearing beside you, bridal heels already abandoned, veil missing, expression completely smug but glowing like a bride should on their big day.

"the big bride," you greeted solemnly with a smile as you milled over drink options for the night.

"the exhausted bride," ella corrected. "buy me a drink, y/n!"

you snorted at her dramatics as she lay slightly on the bar. "you literally have an open bar." you pointed to the bar you both were stood at.

"exactly. open for you to buy me one."

"that's not how open bars work, els."

ella leaned more dramatically (if possible) against the counter, grinning persuasively. "i'm the bride, y/n. have a heart or i'm telling less you upset the bride"

you sighed heavily knowing ella always used alessia to your expense, as you turned like it physically pained you, "your lucky i like you. one drink then i'm bankrupt."

"that's so generous of you."

a minute later they were both leaning against the bar with drinks in hand while the reception buzzed around them.

ella looked happy. not just wedding-day happy but settled happy. the kind that sat softly in someone. you noticed it immediately.

"you alright there?" ella asked suddenly, changing the topic from her favourite songs.

you blinked. "hm?"

ella grinned into her drink. "you've looked across the room at alessia at least twelve times since we've been stood here."

you glanced over instinctively again and there she was.

alessia stood near the dancefloor with a couple of teammates, laughing at something leah was saying. her hair had started falling loose from dancing, cheeks flushed pink beneath the warm lights.

she looked beautiful. painfully beautiful.

you didn't even realise you were smiling until ella nudged her shoulder. "oh, you are down horrendous."

you laughed softly, taking a sip of your drink. "shut up."

"no seriously," ella continued, delighted. "i've known less for years and i don't think i've ever seen her look at someone the way she looks at you."

you expression softened automatically. because you knew that look. that look across crowded rooms. the instinctive searching for each other. the little unconscious smiles whenever you both caught eye contact. it still got you every time.

"she's had a long season," you said quietly after a second. "i just like seeing her happy."

ella hummed knowingly placing her drink back down on the bar. "and she's happiest with you."

you looked back toward alessia again. almost like she felt it too, alessia glanced over at that exact moment. immediate smile. immediate softening. like the entire room shifted into focus the second she spotted you. you felt your chest tighten stupidly hard.

"oh my god," ella laughed beside her, asking the bar tender for another round of drinks. "that's actually disgusting."

you rolled your eyes but couldn't stop smiling. "she's staring now too," ella informed you, passing another drink with a dainty straw placed down the side of it.

"she's always staring."

"because she's obsessed with you."

you took another sip of your original drink, trying and failing to look unaffected. "i'm aware."

ella leaned closer conspiratorially. "wanna know something funny?"

you looked at her suspiciously, brow raising slightly. unsure with what was about to come out of her mouth. “always concerning when you start a sentence like that."

"before the ceremony less was panicking because she thought you might think she looked weird." ella admitted as she had a slightly smile on face as she waited for your reaction.

you looked genuinely offended. "weird? she looks unreal."

"exactly what i said." ella grinned. "she changed earrings three times."

you burst out laughing, your head immediately imagining the scene taking place this morning having encounter it a few times yourself whenever waiting for alessia to get ready. "no she didn't"

"she absolutely did. then she asked me if the dress made her shoulders look 'too broad.'"

you nearly choked on your drink. "the woman plays professional football for a living and still worries about that?"

ella shrugged dramatically. "love makes people stupid."

you smiled helplessly at that because maybe it did. maybe love was staring across crowded rooms all night like somebody hung the stars specifically for them.

maybe it was knowing exactly where alessia was even without looking. maybe it was how your entire body relaxed whenever alessia touched her.

across the room alessia laughed again at something, head tipping back slightly. you genuinely couldn't take her eyes off her.

ella noticed immediately. "soooo.." she said smugly, dragging the word out, "when are you proposing?"

you this time nearly inhaled her drink, placing the glass down abruptly "jesus christ, tooney."

ella cackled loudly. before you could defend herself, alessia finally made her way over through the crowd, immediately stepping between your knees while she stood against the bar like second nature.

her hands settled automatically on your waist. "you two talking about me?" alessia asked suspiciously, looking more so at ella then you as you placed a quick kiss to the side of her head.

ella took one look at your completely soft expression and lost it laughing again. "oh, absolutely."

alessia shook her head, before slipping back into a conversation with the two of you as she ordered herself another drink from the bar.

—

after sitting and talking with ella and alessia for a bit, they both bolted back to the dance floor when once of their songs came on, alessia pulling you over with a small pout telling you that you hadn't danced enough with her tonight.

even though you hated dancing, you let her drag you through the crowd as she swayed you around for a few songs. but once the dance floor began to die down again you managed to slip outside for some air.

the gardens behind the venue were quieter now. soft music drifted outside through the open doors while fairy lights glowed overhead

ella words of 'when are you proposing' circling your head. now because the words scared you but because it was what you wanted it and maybe this was the first realisation of what reality could be.

not that you hadn't thought about it, cause you had. maybe more than you'd like to admit but you knew alessia was the one for you.

but as you stated of into the distance, letting the cool air drift over you, sound of footsteps behind you. then alessia's arms wrapping around your waist from behind automatically making you jump a little before melting into them when you realised who it was.

"found you." she whispered as she kissed the top of your head.

you smiled immediately, leaning back into her. "you survived maid of honour duties then?"

"barely." alessia groaned dramatically against your shoulder. "i'm exhausted."

"so is this you escaping already?" you teased as you wrapped your arm around her.

"needed five minutes." she mumbled, playing with one of the bracelets on your wrist.

"five minutes away from the wedding?" you questioned as your mind replayed alessia's day just being surrounded with people having the best day ever.

alessia let out a laugh, as a breeze of air drifted past the two of you. "just minutes away from tooney and her walking on broken glass song."

"fair."

for a moment the two of you sat in comfortable silence, the muffled sound of music and laughter drifting through the venue doors behind you.

the evening air was cool against your skin. inside, the dance floor was packed. outside, it felt like the entire world had slowed down.

you glanced sideways at her, she was quiet but you could tell her mind was busy "you okay?"

"yeah." her answer came easily, but there was something softer underneath it.

she looked back towards the venue, a small smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. "its weird, isn't it?"

"what is?" you asked, looking down at her a smile still on her lips.

"ella being married." she answered, still looking ahead as if her mind was replaying all the memories from her childhood of the two growing up together.

you nodded, agreeing, "feels like five minutes ago we were all kids."

"exactly."

alessia laughed quietly. "i spent half the ceremony trying not to think about that."

"you did cry though." you pointed out, the moment replaying in your head as you tried to take your eyes off how gorgeous alessia looked in the moment.

"i was not the only one."

"you were one of the worst."

she nudged your shoulder. "i'll remember that." but you grinned. the venue doors opened briefly as someone slipped outside before disappearing again, letting a burst of music spill into the night.

alessia watched them go before looking back out across the gardens. "its nice, though."

"what is?"

"this."

you raised an eyebrow, not following. "sitting on a cold stone step?"

she rolled her eyes at your sarcasm, "no." you waited for her response to follow as alessia's smile softened. "watching your best friend marry the person she loves."

there was something thoughtful in her voice now. something almost distant. you followed her gaze back towards the glowing lights of the reception.

ella and joe were probably somewhere inside being dragged into another round of photographs or speeches or dances. the whole day had felt like one giant celebration of love.

"i know what you mean," you admitted as alessia hummed.

another few seconds passed then you smiled to yourself before turning pulling alessia in just that little bit closer and for a second neither of you spoke

you both just sat there quietly beneath the lights. alessia looked beautiful still, despite the slightly smudged makeup and tired eyes.

maybe even more beautiful now, more real.

you reached up, brushing a loose curl back behind her ear gently. "you've had a nice day?" alessia asked quietly.

you smiled. "yeah," then softer: "i think it might be one of my favourite days actually."

alessia's expression melted a little at that as she could hear the genuineness in your tone. "yeah?"

"mhm."

inside the venue someone started loudly singing terribly to the music and both of you laughed. then you glanced back toward the reception room where ella and joe were dancing surrounded by everyone they loved.

"you know," you said so casually, just saying what your brain had been thinking all day, "you'll be next."

alessia blinked, thinking she had misheard you. "...what?"

you shrugged lightly like you hadn't just changed the entire atmosphere. "you. us. wedding. eventually."

alessia stared at you for a second. actually stared like you had grown horns on top of your head for a moment.

you then suddenly realised what you'd said and laughed nervously. "okay wow that sounded way smoother in my head..."

"you want to marry me?"

you stopped talking because alessia wasn't teasing. she looked genuinely stunned. soft and hopeful. your expression gentled instantly. "well... yeah." the answer came so naturally it almost surprised you. but it was true, completely true.

alessia looked at you like you'd just handed her the entire world. "you do?"

you laughed quietly. "less, i followed you to three different countries this season and sat through approximately nine hundred ice baths. obviously i want to marry you."

alessia's eyes crinkled at the corners, all emotional again in that way she got. "you're serious?"

you cupped her face carefully. "one hundred percent serious."

for a moment alessia just looked overwhelmed then she leaned forward and kissed you. slow. certain and full of feeling. you felt alessia smiling against her mouth halfway through.

when you both finally pulled apart, alessia rested your foreheads together, laughing softly under her breath. "you can't just casually say things like that."

you grinned. "why? scared?"

the first thing as you opened your eyes was you became aware of was the warmth. then the second was the headache.

you groaned quietly into the pillow, immediately regretting it when the sound seemed to echo around your skull. every tiny movement made your head feel heavy and fuzzy, and when you cautiously cracked an eye open, the room tilted just enough to make you screw it shut again.

“no, nope.” a soft laugh sounded beside you.

you peeled one eye open to find alessia already awake, lying on her side facing you. her hair was messy from sleep, one arm tucked beneath her pillow while the other rested across your waist.

“there she is,” alessia murmured as you responded by burying your face further into the pillow.

“i think I’m dying.” you groaned out which was muffled from the face your face was in the pillow however alessia just managed to catch what you were saying.

“no, you’re just hungover, babe”

“so basically dying.”

alessia smiled, her hand immediately sliding into your hair. but the second her fingers began gently combing through the messy strands, you melted. your shoulders dropped. the tension in your face eased. as a pathetic little sigh escaped you.

“there it is,” alessia teased softly.

“don’t stop.” you whispered, as you melted more into her touch with strangely was helping with your headache.

“i wasn’t planning to.” as alessia’s fingers continued their slow path through your hair, occasionally scratching lightly against your scalp. it felt unfairly nice.

you shifted closer instinctively, pressing your forehead against her shoulder. immediately her arm wrapped around you properly. “better?” she asked.

“mhm.”

“head still spinning?”

“mhm.”

“thirsty?”

you groaned as the thought of a nice glass of water really came to the forefront of your mind, “mhm.”

alessia laughed quietly at your response, or so lack of response. “very talkative this morning.”

you opened one eye just enough to glare at her. the glare probably would’ve been more intimidating if your face wasn’t half buried against her neck. “mean.” you whispered as you placed her hand on the spot of your head which you wanted her to play with your hair.

“i’m taking care of you.”

“meanly.”

“that’s not a word.” alessia said quickly as a small laugh came from her as you chose to go back to not responding.

but that was mostly because her hand had moved from your hair to your forehead now, her fingertips tracing gently along your hairline. the motion was soothing enough that you nearly fell asleep again.

almost.

then another wave of hangover hit. you winced. “oh, that’s horrible.”

alessia immediately leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “you poor thing.”

you frowned immediately, “hey! don’t patronise me.”

but another kiss landed on your temple from alessia, “i’m not.”

“but you’re doing the voice.” you whined as another wave of spinning came across your head.

“what voice?”

“the voice.”

alessia’s grin widened as she knew exactly what you were on about.

“the one you use when I’m injured, ill or being dramatic?” you explained properly but your voice was still hoarse.

“so all the time?” alessia teased, as you groan loudly knowing alessia had that usual teasing smile spreading across her lips, the same smile she used every time she was winding you up

the groan however made your head hurt more which only made you groan again and alessia was openly laughing now. “baby,”

“my own actions have consequences.” you whined, screwing your eyes shut as if that was going to rid the headache you currently had.

“they do.” alessia whispered placing a warm kiss to the side of your head before you buried your face fully against her shoulder.

“i don’t like consequences.” you said although it was muffled and alessia only caught half of it, her hand returned to your hair immediately, fingertips moving slowly through it while she pressed another absent-minded kiss to the top of your head.

and for a few moments neither of you spoke. the room stayed quiet. just the two of you tangled together beneath the duvet.

but eventually you mumbled into her shoulder. “can’t believe you came to get me.”

alessia’s hand paused briefly before resuming its gentle movements. “of course i did.”

a small smile tugged at your lips. even with your head spinning. even with the hangover. even with the knowledge that the city girls almost certainly had enough videos to ruin your life.

you felt safe. comfortable. loved. “i love you,” you mumbled sleepily.

alessia laughed softly and kissed your forehead again. “i should hope so.”

“no.” you shifted slightly closer somehow. “i really love you.”

the smile in her voice was impossible to miss. “i really love you too, my champion.”

yet three hours in, alessia was sat cross-legged on the living room floor with her ten-month-old niece balanced between her legs, watching rosa enthusiastically attempt to eat a soft toy giraffe while you laughed so hard tears had gathered in your eyes.

"roro, sweetheart, that's not food," you said through a grin. rosa instead paused with the giraffe half way to her mouth as she looked directly at you before immediately shoving the giraffe back into her mouth.

you groaned dramatically as alessia burst out laughing, "oh, she absolutely knows what she's doing."

"no she doesn't."

"she does."

"she's ten months old."

alessia pointed at rosa. "look at that face. thats the face of someone causing problems deliberately." and as if she understood every word, rosa let out a delighted squeal.

the three of you dissolved into laughter and that was the way it had been like that all afternoon.

easy. comfortable. but domestic in a way neither of you got to experience often with football constantly pulling you in different directions.

there had been bottle feeds and naps that didn't happen when they were supposed to.

there had been several dramatic tears because rosa had dropped her favourite toy and to her that was on par with the whole world ending.

there had also been countless moments where alessia had looked over at you and felt her chest ache. not in a painful way. in a way that made her wonder how she had gotten this lucky.

because every single time rosa reached for you, your whole face softened. every time she babbled nonsense at you, you answered as though she was holding a perfectly coherent conversation.

every time she smiled, you smiled right back and alessia couldn't stop watching.

at one point she'd caught rosa crawling determinedly across the rug towards you. you opened your arms immediately. "come on then." you cooed as rosa practically launched herself into your lap.

and the look on your face when you'd hugged her-

god. alessia thought she might have fallen in love with you all over again. not that she'd ever stopped. but somehow moments like this made it worse. or better. probably both.

"why are you staring at me?" you asked with a smile as the sound of your voice pulled alessia from her thoughts.

alessia blinked. "hm?"

"you're doing the thing." you pointed out as rosa stood up against you, pulling at small strands of your pony tail.

"the thing?" alessia questioned, confused at what you were trying to get at.

"the heart eyes thing." you said, not before pulling rosa's tight little grip from your hair as alessia immediately looked away her cheeks blushing a slight shade of pink.

"there it is."

"i wasn't doing anything."

"you absolutely were."

alessia rolled her eyes, yet when she glanced back over, she found you smiling at her. softly. fondly. the same way she knew she was looking at you. the warmth that settled in her chest made her feel almost dizzy.

then rosa sneezed directly into your face and the romantic moment was ruined instantly. as you sat frozen for a moment, processing what had just happened.

alessia stared, before she completely lost it. laughing so hard she nearly fell backwards. "oh my god."

"oh my god?" you looked horrified. "your niece just sneezed in my mouth."

alessia was crying with laughter now and rosa, well she looked incredibly pleased with herself.

—

by the time afternoon rolled around, rosa was becoming noticeably sleepy. she’s gone from excited crawling and babbling to rubbing her eyes every few minutes and becoming increasingly clingy.

currently she was curled against alessia’s chest whilst alessia sat on the floor leant against the couch. a pictured book rested in one hand. the other rubbing slow circles quietly in the doorway.

you stood just across the room, watching on as you made two cups of tea. the room was warm from the sunlight filtering through the windows.

everything felt peaceful and safe.

alessia’s voice had dropped to a soft murmur as she read. not because rosa understood the story. she most likely definitely didn't. but because she liked hearing alessia speak.

the little girl was completely relaxed. one tiny hand curled around alessia’s shirt. her eyes fluttering more heavily with every page.

you couldn't stop smiling. alessia looked beautiful like this. her hair slightly messy. voice gentle as she held rosa as though she was the most precious thing in the world.

your heart squeezed painfully. because this wasn't football alessia. this wasn't the alessia everyone else knew. this was your girl. your alessia.

soft, patient and incredibly loving

the woman who melted whenever she saw her niece. who ried over sentimental videos. who still reached for your hand in crowded rooms but who would also mange to trip over thin air any chance she got.

eventually rosa’s eyes drifted closed completely. alessia continued reading for another few moments just to be safe.

then carefully closed the book as the room became quiet, just the small sound of you pouring milk into the cups.

you watched her stand slowly. every movement careful and deliberate.rosa didn't stir once and she gently settled her into her bouncer tucking a small blanket around her before pressing a kiss to her forehead.

as she stepped back, moving towards you as you handed her a hot mug of tea. as you both looked at the tiny sleeping baby. the little ride and fall of her chest and how peaceful she looked.

alessia leaning lightly into you as you placed sweet kiss to the side of her head before you both moved towards the couch.

the house felt strangely quiet after rosa had fallen asleep and you both found yourselves curled together on the sofa. a blanket thrown across both your laps.

alessia leaning into your side her head resting against your chest and for a while neither of you spoke. simply enjoying the rare silence.

then alessia sighed softly. "what?" you asked as you felt her smile against your shoulder.

"nothing." she said quietly, her hand tracing over a tattoo on your wrist.

"liar." as a quiet laugh escaped her making you tilt your head towards her with a small smile, "what are you thinking about?"

you watched as alessia hesitated and you immediately became curious. because alessia russo was rarely speechless. "less?"

she looked up at you and there it was. that look. the one that always made your stomach flutter. "i really love her." she said quietly.

you smiled. "i know."

"no, i mean..." she laughed softly. "i know she's my niece so obviously i love her. but every time i spend time with her i somehow love her more."

you nodded."roro is pretty easy to love."

"she is." alessia agreed as her gaze drifted towards the ceiling, thoughtful. "i think seeing her grow up has been one of my favourite things."

your expression softened. alessia rarely talked about things like this at least not out loud or very often.

"i like watching you with her." you admitted, as you looked down at her.

her eyes found yours again. "yeah?"

you nodded. "yeah."

the smile that appeared on her face was small. shy. almost. "i like watching you with her too."

you stomach flipped. "you do?"

"course i do." alessia smiled as she reached for your hand. threading your fingers together. "and you don't even realise you do it."

"do what?" you asked as your brows furrowed together.

"the voice."

"what voice?"

"the baby voice."

you groaned immediately, now knowing exactly what she meant as she laughed, “no but it’s cute baby”

"it is not."

"it is."

"it absolutely isn't."

she was grinning now. "it really is." as you shook your head yet you were smiling too. because there was no winning these arguments. not when alessia looked at you like that. not when she seemed so happy.

a comfortable silence settled between you again. then alessia spoke.quieter this time. "do you ever think about it?"

you looked at her. "think about what?"

she swallowed and suddenly looked nervous. "having kids."

your heart skipped. not because the question scared you, the two of you had briefly mentioned it before but scared you because of how vulnerable she sounded asking it.

tou turned slightly towards her, giving her your full attention. as alessia’s eyes searched yours. as though she was trying to gauge your reaction before you'd even answered.

"yeah," you admitted softly. "i do."

something immediately relaxed in her expression. a tiny exhale escaping her.

"yeah?"

you nodded. "yeah." as smile tugged at your lips. "maybe more than i probably should."

alessia laughed quietly. "me too."

the confession hung between you. gentle as neither of you rushing the conversation. neither trying to force it into something bigger than it needed to be.

your brushed your thumb over her knuckles. "you’d be an amazing mum, you know."

the words slipped out naturally because they were true. the way alessia’s face softened nearly broke your heart.

"you think?"

you stared at her. "in every universe, less."

her eyes immediately became suspiciously bright. you leaned forward. pressing a kiss against her forehead. then another against her cheek. “you're patient."

kiss.

"kind."

kiss.

"ridiculously loving."

kiss.

"you read the same page six times because rosa kept trying to eat the book."

alessia laughed through her smile. "that did happen."

"it did." you tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "and any kid would be more than lucky to have you."

for a moment she just looked at you. completely overwhelmed. completely in love. then she reached up cupping your cheek. "i think about it with you."

your breath caught. the confession was quiet. almost whispered. but it hit harder than anything else she could have said.

"i don't just think about having kids." she said in the same quiet tone as her thumb stroked softly across your skin. "i think about having them with you and..”

you felt your eyes sting. not from sadness. from the sheer weight of being loved so completely. so intentionally.

you leaned into her touch. smiling. “and?"

alessia’s small smile returned, slow and beautiful. “and one day… not yet.” she pressed her fore against yours, before planting a kiss to your lips as you chased her lips as she pulled away. “but one day, i think we’d make a pretty good team”

you laughed softly, finding her lips again peppering a few light kisses, “we already do.”

alessia smiled, then kissed you properly. slow and sweet. as her hand rested on yours chin. the type of kiss that felt like home.