E

I FORGOT ABOUT THIS. But yes you got it:

kiwi: obvious number 1. the hook being “im having your baby its none of your business”? holland tunnel for a nose its always backed up?? the sniffing noise!? she’s all over me ITS LIKE I PAID FOR IT???? the title having literally nothing to do with the song? the song being horny and psychotic as fuck and the music video being hehe puppies and cupcakes?? it being in between sweet creature and esny on the tracklist? the way none of it makes any fucking sense?? guitar solo??? he was taking zero prisoners.

from the dining table: if the depressed jacking off in the literal opening line wasn’t enough he then goes onto say he almost said his exes name after sleeping with their clone. seek help 

sign of the times: truly very few things crazier than debuting into your solo career with a 6 minute political non radio-friendly soft-rock ballad from the perspective of a mother on her deathbed telling her newborn that they have to find a way out in a world that is doomed and burning (that you happened to write in FIVE MINUTES) risking potentially alienating ur entire bubblegum pop audience and then calling it “playing it safe”. 

carolina: name dropped her, said the pussy was fire, and then outed her for underage drinking. ruthless. 

only angel: simply “IM STILL THE ONLY ONE WHO’S BEEN IN LOVE WITH ME” 😐. ‘hahah im gonna die alone’ in first few lines and then proceeds to sing about hole for the next 3 minutes like nothing happened... 

woman: wannabe-homewrecker anthem

meet me in the hallway: who the fuck opens an album like this.... “just take the pain away” damn bitch slow down we’re only 2 minutes into this 

two ghosts: actually very soothing therefore not So unhinged except kinda hilarious to respond to a whole album written about you with a single song saying “this relationship is dead <3 we’re ghosts. thanks tho”

ever since new york: clearly a very meaningful and real song to him. the only thing i have to say is that on a personal level “ive been praying never did before” threatens to completely unravel me every single day

i hadn’t but i did just for you <3 and bc there’s been so much talk about how fine line isnt insane just because it’s a more cohesive project 🙄. sorry this ones long, he’s crazy. 

cherry: obviously. the pained screaming at the end. the insanity of including the voicenote. the overall pettiness. not to mention my favorite bit: "does he take you walking around his PARENTS' gallery?". he said I miss you and also your stupid little new boyfriend is a nepotism child who has never achieved anything himself in his entire life. anyway I wear ur shirt sometimes :(

watermelon sugar: he wrote a whole song about how if he doesn't eat pussy he Will die. unprovoked. also legitimately hilarious and unhinged how he took an exes favorite book, made it into a song about box munching (which has. NOTHING to do with the plot), and then had that song become HIS entire identity to everyone that knows him. and he put his little trumpets on it to top it off. finessed. crazy. horny.

to be so lonely: actual crazy behaviour to put this DIRECTLY after falling ("there's no one to blame but the drink and my wandering hands") and open with no actually you CAN'T blame me bc I'm a sweet little boy 🙄 also don't call him or me baby ever again. also I'm an arrogant son of a bitch. and jealous as fuck. not my fault tho

fine line: Girl I am sobbing. what the fuck is crisp trepidation. you are not normal

she: *most mindboggling cryptic shit about either a gender crisis or wet dreams for 3 min* *guitar solo*

treat people with kindness: song itself is very bright and loud and but in a 'i have screws loose' way. it's like the auditory version of seeing a clown. like this is fun but why do I get the feeling that someone is about to die. I mean "if our friends all pass away, it's okay".... COME AGAIN???

golden: most depressing fucking 'love song' of all time. every lyric in this is a direct act of war. shan't elaborate

falling: oh the concept of becoming something you hate because you feel so unwanted and worry that someone who means a lot to you will regret what you had so much that they will never mention you or even need you, and that feeling weighs you down in every way and you don't even think you can change 😂😐 very cool very fun thank you

adore you: "I would die for you I worship the ground you walk. but you don't have to say you love me LMFAOOOO EWW". girl.... 

lights up: about self discovery! very fun very beautiful, but incredibly funny that the verses are like "I respect heterosexuality (no I don't. never going back) but it ain't me 🙏"

sunflower vol. 6: why is it the 6th volume. where are the other five. (on a serious note, constantly thinking about the link to 'Flowers in the Window’ (the song he wanted played at his funeral) which has a similar "plant new seeds" lyric 😐. society if harry could write one love song without referencing endless suffering or death).

french: :)

english: oh boy

french: :)

english: oh no

french: :)

english: oh geez

english: :)

french: don’t

german: :)

english: oh dear

spanish: :)

english: no don’t

spanish: :)

english: oh lordy

polish: :)

english: i changed my mind

UK english: ladybird!

american english: ladybug

french: weird

dutch: :)

french: …what

dutch: the good lord’s little animal

french: …ok

irish, polish and russian: *giggling*

french: …just tell me

Dutch: :)

English: … tell me

“Another story about Steve Jobs was when they brought the prototype for the iPad 2 to his office. The engineers told him it was faster than the first iPad. He took it over to his aquarium and dropped it in. ‘Look how slowly it sank,’ he told them. ‘Make it faster.’

“One time a newly hired intern had been sent out to get Steve a sandwich. When she brought it to him, he looked at it. ‘I thought I ordered the beef on rye,’ he asked. She told him it was indeed beef on rye. He took it over to his fish tank and dropped it in. ‘Does that look like beef on rye?’

“He was always dropping things in that fish tank. We couldn’t stop him. We told him he had to stop, he wouldn’t listen. It was full of stuff that shouldn’t be in an aquarium.

“The fish had all died years ago. One had been crushed under an early generation iMac. The others were all poisoned. He didn’t care.