They Did Surgery On A Grape @emilyofjane - Tumblr Blog

This user supports trans rights, asexuals, and bi/pan solidarity, and if you don’t like that, don’t even fucking BREATHE on ANY of my posts.

#pinning this so people will stop acting up in my notes #gatekeepers can go fuck off #just let people be who they are

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sleepytroll

snoopyoftheday

snoopy of the day

notlikingbestgirl

Out of Touch

is-it-out-of-touch-thursday

Yes

#i genuinely forgot what day it was thank you out of touch thursday

the-vanilla-extraction

okay let's make another cake 🎂🎂

butter

sugar

eggs

flour

milk

baking powder

vanilla extract

Remaining time: 5 days 1 hour

dashcon-two

please, dear audience, fill this out. for science

#damn i was really hoping we’d inexplicably gravitate to a new ingredient #i was so prepared for the flour cake

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tricky-bastard-pokemon

ok so

everyone knows about this meme, right?

but does anyone else know the woman who made the food? no? time to educate!

This is “Mother Mary”, the owner of Blackberry’s mother.

She made all the cakes for the restaurant while it was open. Chef Gordon Ramsay tried her red velvet cake, and spoke this meme-able line:

He then called Mary over, complimented her food, and gave her a peck on the cheek.

Look how happy she was to hear that!!!

anyways, I hope she has been able to continue her love for baking since the restaurant closed down.

tasmanianstripes

For these who don’t know: The restaurant she worked at closed down but she left before that and opened her own bakery, that’s apparently very successful!

thyminee

Oh god, the Fortnite collab is working. I need to make a PSA quick.

Please for the love of GOD do not return to Neopets.

If you love yourself and your bank account, please don’t do it. It’s a buggy, broken mess stuck between two different site layouts, it’s infested with adware, it’s aggressively monetized with predatory gacha/battle passes/premium paywalls, and its cybersecurity is a joke. And don’t even get me started on the poor moderation and rampant transphobia that’s been an issue since 2025. It’s not worth it.

Save your wallet. Save your sanity. Don’t return to Neopets.

#psa #neopets #fortnite

lesbianshepard

waaaay back when I was a cashier in retail we would talk about dumb shit while unloading the truck, and we got to the "what would you do in a zombie apocalypse" me and another worker were like yeah we would just die. End it all, we can't fight or run or shit. I refuse to put that much effort into survival.

And my manager was like no!!!! If that happened, I would drive to find you guys in my truck and we could eat stuff from my wife's garden and I would make sure everyone I know survived!! I would carry you all on my shoulders away from the zombies!!

Anyway, random shout out to that guy. You were too kind for retail management, Devin.

lesbianshepard

also afterwards everyone who was talking about their cool bunker fantasies were like "Damn, Devin's right, we should also be considering helping people around us." which is the only recorded instance of a retail shift making people better human beings.

systlin

Incidentally, if you are fishing any stream or river in the Mississippi river watershed and catch any fuckers that look like this;

DO NOT THROW THEM BACK FOR FUCK’S SAKE.

That’s an Asian Carp, and they ARE invasive. The Iowa DNR encourages people to catch, kill, and eat as many as possible.

They’re also tasty as hell, even though they’ve got lots of bones.

systlin

Also, yes, this fish has weird eyes that are set real low and look downwards.

It does not have two eyes on the same side; it just has a mark there that looks sorta like one.

Another pic;

They mostly eat plants, but sometimes will get snagged when line fishing. But, they also do THIS;

Midwesterners being who we are, we immediately knew what to do; BOWFISH THEM SHITS

And INVENT THE SPORT KNOWN AS ‘SCARPING’, which is just netting them out of the air/smacking them with baseball bats/spearing them with pitchforks/ect while waterskiing;

thatweirdlittlegothgirl-deactiv

See…I’m good with a bow…but not that good. I AM however much better with a net and having the prey come to me. …Does anyone want to take me to go Scarping?

systlin

You can also use a shotgun

The DNR actively encourages all inventive ways of killing them off that people can come up with. There’s no limit on them, so you can fill up the boat.

And they’re DANGED tasty. Nice mild firm white flesh.

cerulean-beekeeper-deactivated2

Only in American might you go shooting fish off the back of a moving boat.

numberlover1729

for the environment, yeah.

peashooter85

These things are a menace and they desperately need to be exterminated! They are a non native species that have devastated the ecosystem of the Mississippi River and are proceeding to invade all connected tributaries. They literally eat everything and reproduce leaving entire rivers lifeless wastelands. If they enter the Great Lakes it will be an ecological nightmare. For the love of all that is good and holy start murdering them with prejudice before it is too late!!!!

kasaron

Hogs, and Asian Carp are KOS in America.

Good eating, and everyone, including mother nature will thank you.

moth-doe

They are also a huge factor in the extinction of the Axolotl in the wild

EAT EM BOYS

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universeleads

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

universeleads

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

overwhelmedfernfrond

I explained the “x before gta6” meme to my immigrant father and he, in turn, explained to me how back in his day in Romania, they had the same type of joke, except instead of it being gta6, it was about the imminent death of a singer named Gică Petrescu, who everyone was continuously shocked by because he refused to die. Every time a momentous event happened people would say, in essence: “This happened and Gică Petrescu hasn’t even died yet?!?”

So. He understood the gta6 meme immediately because they apparently had the same thing in Romania when he was young, except way, way more morbid

venort

OP are you telling me we got the death of Gică Petrescu before we got gta6

tiktoksthataregood-ish

mrsterlingeverything

Um actually scrub daddy is my comfort character and it physically and psychically hurts me to see you chop him up and eat him after freezing and cracking him up with liquid nitrogen while naked with big boobs?

mousemilf

dont worry abt it, you just keep reading your lines and well take care of the rest. you'll be a star.

mrsterlingeverything

Ill be a star

oneheadtoanother

demilypyro

I hope gta6 flops I hope rockstar goes under I hope it kills the AAA industry as it currently exists and stigmatizes the concept of ever-increasing development costs in pursuit of ever-bigger games for years to come and we enter a golden age of low budget game development as consumers flock to playing indie games

demilypyro

chili-mac-and-cheese

we're starting to see a shift with movies this year. First Iron Lung (2026), then Backrooms (2026), Hokum (2026) and Obsession (2026). Lower budget, less studio notes, more new faces in cinema getting the chance they have been waiting for. With Mandalorian and Grogu (2026), The Flash (2023), and Captain America: Brave New World (2025) all being flops, the idea of a half billion dollar movie budget seems more a gamble than ever. I look forward to seeing how this cultural shift affects other media formats as it ripples throughout live-action cinema.

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redstonedust

they're not super common but i really do appreciate characters who are introduced as one gender and later revealed to be closeted trans. i like that it challenges the audience to really think about how they perceive trans people because realistically not every trans person you meet is going to be out to you at first. yes we introduced this character as a man and now we're asking you to reframe her as a woman after you've already gotten to know her. can you be normal about that? can you be normal when it happens to people you know in real life? i hope you can.

bunniope

i skink therefore i scram...!

bunniope

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