Shocking Ga(y)tor

The Peel is an offshoot of the Onion but honestly if someone told me this was real slam poetry I wouldn’t even question it

No one tells you that one day you will get older and look around and notice that 95% of ppl who own a dog should not own a dog

Sleeping poorly is so embarrassing... sorry im grumpy I stayed up past my bedtime. Like a toddler

the enemy drank water today. did you?

i drank water three days ago. im several steps ahead of the enemy. this is what it takes to win

We need better conflict resolution skills from everybody because currently everybody is so conflict-avoidant that they’re choosing to be tense forever rather than reach a conclusion.

Remember my post about how if there’s somebody you’re dreading talking to the best thing to do for everyone involved is probably talk to them first? That.

My husband was talking about how a lot of his male friends seem to be in unhappy relationships and he came to the same conclusion. One or both members of the couple are avoiding communication and letting tension build up rather than resolving it.

You know, when I've remarked that a lot of the responses to my posts feel like people are just plucking out keywords they think they recognise based on the shape of them and replying to what they imagine the post says based on that, the possibility never occurred to me that this is actually how many American schools are currently teaching kids to read.

Like, my assumption this whole time has been that when folks go "I misunderstood this post that says [thing] as saying [unrelated thing] because I mistook [word] for [completely different word that happens to start with the same letter]", that was a bit. What do you mean they're teaching kids a reading method that's tailored to produce this exact error?

having sex with your friends is so very normal please stop poisoning the youths minds with shame surrounding hooking up with your friends. especially if you’re gay

people are so fucking mad in the notes that adults have sex with each other and aren’t married sometimes. yall are carbon copies of your conservative parents and you’re so proud of it. ewwww

living under a rock is so fun i love watching a movie that’s been famous for decades and being like wow this is so good.. did you guys know about this

I expected my cpap machine to make a dramatic difference right away but after waking up from my first night on the machine I think the experience can be described as I woke up and thought “well I don’t think I feel dramatically different but it also definitely feels like something in there has been unclogged”

It’s like uh like when you finally remember to clean the hair out of the shower drain after a while. But with my general vibe.

According to my app which no is not called cpapp unfortunately I only stopped breathing 1.7 times per hour. Which might sound weird but during my sleep apnea test I stopped breathing 23.5 times per hour so as you can imagine breathing is generally better than not breathing

i don't support all women's rights & wrongs some of you are terfs

There's an attitude I've been seeing more and more of where having any kind of artistic opinion that isn't praise is seen as some kind of faux pas designed to yuck people's yum or whatever, and while I understand the kneejerk response behind it I do have to wonder like. How sustainable do you think it is to foster an environment where even the most casual criticism is met with hoards of defensive with Whoa Mama Mia Cunt Let People Enjoy Things style comments

OK so yes feedback is necessary specifically in art but I have seen people just be full on mean or unnecessarily harsh. There's creative criticism and then there's just being a dick for the sake of it.

"this is fetish art" okay ❤️ yay ❤️

rebecca black was right. It’s Friday

One of the best things about being a writer is thinking of something small you can add to your work that’s just. Devastating. Like you’re sitting there going. Oh. That would be diabolical. People would get really riled up about that. Exquisite. Let’s do it.