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Daily affirmations for tesla owners: your car is ugly as hell and everyone hates you

buy the grocery store battle pass it lets you get exclusive breads and cheeses and you can cut in line whenever you want

My beautiful baby daughter has been christened %appdata% Roaming .minecraft

latches onto you and you have 5 seconds to press the x button 20 times or I tear out your spine and dink the juice

so stupid that stuff like this doesnt happen anymore

This made me lol and I'm not proud of it

Why

Nobody owes you an explanation

if i got put in a jigsaw trap and survived i wouldnt learn anything id just be like well that was fucked up lol

i think the real beauty of this is that just now i clasped my balls together in such a way that made them slip past each other in my scrotum creating a formation that i like to call “the testicular charleston”