for hearth and home

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

OP are you telling me we got the death of Gică Petrescu before we got gta6

When medusa has sex are the snakes weird for the other person? I don't mean in an "ewww snakes" or "ewww monster" way, I mean like in the same way as if someone has a bunch of little cats or dogs staring at you the whole time

everyones got that fic they chip away at like michaelangelo sculpting david. and brother? its penis month

asked my friends if they knew what i was referencing and they said no. we all know that post where someone divided how long it took michelangelo to sculpt david by it's size and went "yuuuuup. whole month spent on penis" right. sure, my search history is full variations upon "michelangelo penis month tumblr" to no avail, but we all know it. right.

Hi, that was a MBMBAM bit. But i see you and i hear you and i dont know if someone already said something

↸ᒷᔑℸ ̣⍑ !¡ᒷリᔑꖎℸ ̣|| ℸ ̣∴𝙹 ∴⍑𝙹ꖎᒷ ᒲ╎リ⚍ℸ ̣ᒷᓭ ╎ᓭ ᔑ ⎓⚍ᓵꖌ╎リ⊣ ᓵ∷╎ᒲᒷ

RULE NO. 1 OF WOUND CARE: ignore itttt :33

DO NOT

RULE NO. 2 OF WOUND CARE: go swimming!! in a pond or especially a public pool :)

WHO TF ARE YOU?!?!?!

I love your agreeable and amenable and flexible nature and how none of your wants and needs ever get priority and how nobody even knows what they are to begin with and how you never start or engage in conflicts and never express even mildly unsavory opinions and get along with everyone from every conceivable group, that’s so trustworthy. hey quick question. do you happen to have an enormous pressurized reservoir of rage and resentment you feel like you can’t ever analyze or express because that would break the rules for the kind of person you are and if so, do you think a lifetime of squashing it down might ever backfire?

U used to call me on my shellphone

do u think i can go for a run today or is that something only normal people are allowed to do

weird animals run all the time dude

im going to go for a scamper and scare everyone

Things to do with your twin

Don’t worry I’m vaccinated and neutered

And those nice ladies at the front desk will put me in a funny cardboard box if you don’t have a carrier to take me home in