eiayoh

Because I deserve it.

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because help is out there. not always in the way you expect. sometimes its a shower chair, sometimes its the worlds simplest cookbook, and sometimes its a stranger who compliments your hair.

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There are still more random bug facts to learn.

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There are days when you open the news and it just hits different. Not in a "wow this is wild" way but in a "why are we like this" way. A shootout inside the senate building. A senator wanted by the ICC who keeps appearing and disappearing like a bad dream. Another senator caught on record saying hide the CCTV footage. And on top of all that, an impeachment trial for the sitting vice president. This is not a political thriller on Netflix. This is Tuesday.

And the worst part is you're not even surprised anymore. That's what gets me. The bar has been lowered so many times that chaos in the halls of government just feels like background noise now. We've been conditioned to just absorb it and move on, because what else can you do? You go to work, you commute, you pay your bills, and somewhere in Manila, people with actual power over your life are out here acting like extras in a teleserye.

I get why people want to leave. I really do. When you look at all of this and then think about what it costs just to live a decent life here, the thought crosses your mind. It's embarrassing to admit but it does. Not because you don't love the country, but because you're tired of loving something that keeps getting let down by the people who were supposed to take care of it.

But then. I don't know. There's still something that makes you stay, or at least makes you hope. Maybe it's the people around you. The ones who still show up, still care, still get angry because anger means they haven't given up. Maybe that's enough to hold onto for now.