hackerman

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

"we detected a mature post" yeah I'm in my 30s

Made a lowball offer on eBay as a joke and it got accepted. uh oh.

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real

i keep spending money. i should be killed

ever since i was a child ive had a headache

I NEED A SICKO… im holding out for a sicko till the end of the night ..and hes gotta haha and hes gotta say yess at the window with a look of delight

washing dishes is evil because you go "oh fuck there's so many dishes this is gonna take foreverrr" and then you enter the dish abyss and emerge with your abdomen somehow covered in water and your hands all wrinky and then you look at the clock and what felt like half an hour was actually 10 minutes

"less is more" is a lie perpetuated by big small to sell more less

I should quit my job to pursue a life of meaningless violence

does anyone want to see a really good picture of my kitty cat

not a cat, first off

snale

apparently vic’s vapor rub goes exitinct ? i’ve been using the same vapor rub for years and apparenlty it went bad in the 2010s ..

expired .

*turns my attention inwards* mmmmm. no *turns my attention back outwards* oh god