yes this is the personal blog

“Don’t you think it’s better to wash hands with the devil” - God’s hands are hotter and more hurty

Five days to cover three grades worth of math and science I would not have it any other way

Who can I be good for. Who can I count on to count on me — this is why I've a framed picture of a dead man. But the dead cannot recall, let alone pulse with anything that resembles an emotional foundation. I think I am too drowned in pages, and do not regularly talk to real people, in other words: my soul is lacking a good stir. What would Gogol think about this. That man who chases after anger from a familiar to untie it, only for it's knot to weave itself into his nephesh, until his very end. Maybe I should — Pancreatic cancer stemmed from pancreatitis, suicidal self starvation, physical purification on the verge of madness. It's all the same. Do you understand? Close your eyes. Imagine in your head a bladeless knife with no handle. Do you see how the image recedes from view the more language I add to it? A bladeless knife. With no handle.

My body is taking a toll on me today