Allons-y!

oh she ate

just found 3 bolts and a snail shell on da groun

YOU HAD SOURCES?!???????

Never ever ever eat raw white onion and then smoke cigarette.

The gnomes beat the shit out of you again?

The gnomes beat the shit out of me again.

i've never actually watched a full episode of house md, but based on what i have seen in clips, i fully believe this happened

there are no rules in our kitchen.  i would die.

SHE THINKS HER LAUGH IS A SONG SO SHE SINGS BACK

Posts like this are the reason why I can’t tell anyone IRL that I’m on Tumblr….. How do you explain that to people??

Just tried to play an ancient flute and it started filling the room with this awful miasma that wont go away

fun thing about herding and/or generally neurotic breeds: they are really good at following rules you have instituted, but they will also make their own Dog Rules they will follow stringently whether or not you like it

despite never being reprimanded for getting sick if my dog throws up she will ‘tattle’ on herself and run over to me, show me the throw up, then hide and start shaking uncontrollably. nobody taught her to do this. she has decided that throwing up is a punishable offense until the end of time

my dog has decided that it’s solely on her shoulders to ensure there is peace in my house…if the cats fight she stands between them to ‘break it up’ and/or herds them away, if my rats have an argument she goes to the cage door and barks until they stop. not sure why she has decided she must carry the weight of the world but she has

You ever think about how we call toddlers that because they can't walk right. They toddle about. Fuckin idiots. Fuckin idiot steppers can't walk properly. Call 'em wobblers. This is my son Jeffrey he's at the age where I mock him for walking like a fucking scrub. "Skill issue" ass name.

perfect