Until Dusk to Dawn

to be mad at god

for loss

when he was the one

i can hear my feet touch the ground

but i don’t feel it

with every step i take

i shrink

my vision blurs

all surroundings suddenly move

i‘m motionless

i drift away

thoughts now in my past

i can go back

about how your friends never really knew you

but while telling your storys you‘d make sure they admire you so you add little details to make it more interesting

and you never let them fully in, cause your scared they‘ll see the real you

and you go to bars and get wasted and think about everything thats wrong with you

nd about why your dad left when you were five

you trigger a part of me that wants to get bad again, just so you can cure me

i feel the need to destroy myself to be put back together by you

i want you to kiss my scars and hug me tight while i cry my heart out

I yearned for adulthood at nine years old,

I couldn’t wait to be a woman,

Until I realized the world’s danger as a teen,

I wasn’t even safe at the age that I started to dream,

When there’s men whose hearts are filled with lust and greed,

I couldn’t wait to be a woman,

Until I ran from the fear of being followed practicing my sport,

Covering up my shoulders to prevent their control,

Wrapping the towel around my swimsuit to prevent anyone from looking at me,

I couldn’t wait to be a woman,

Until politicians took away my rights,

Liberty and justice for all, only when it comes to the patriarchy,

I read stories about women who were denied this 100 years past me,

100 years and I still live in a world of misogyny,

Nothing has changed, except the one who is blamed,

Are you man enough, to keep your hands and remarks away,

But even if they can, they’ll just generate something on screen,

Of someone they’ve never seen,

Of someone who they’ll never meet,

Girls are just wanting to be women too,

And that’s when they realize the world's danger too soon,

We must keep our children safe, but our wants never become everyone’s needs,

We must protect the women who are hurt from shame, but their reproductive rights are never seen,

Because women still aren’t safe,

When men get mad for her casting a ballot,

When politicians blame her for saving her life,

When teens create images of their teachers instead,

Being a woman isn’t fun, it’s scary,

It’s like everyday, you’re told to get married,

Having kids will never be the American dream,

But the goals I had as a teen,

I wanted to be a woman,

I wanted to be grown up too soon,

But in 2026,

It’s still a hard ask,

Just to exist without the danger of being free.

to include in your next poem

Avidulous - somewhat greedy.

Breviloquent - marked by brevity of speech.

Compotation - a drinking or tippling together.

Crimpy - of weather; unpleasant; raw and cold.

Desiderium - an ardent desire or longing; especially, a feeling of loss or grief for something lost.

Dyspathy - lack of sympathy.

Ebriosity - habitual intoxication.

Epitasis - the part of a play developing the main action and leading to the catastrophe.

Fantod - a state of irritability and tension.

Graumangere - a great meal.

Grimoire - a magician's manual for invoking demons and the spirits of the dead.

Hiemal - of or relating to winter.

Illaudable - deserving no praise.

Impluvious - wet with rain.

Innominate - having no name; unnamed; also, “anonymous”.

Juberous - doubtful and hesitating.

Noctilucous - shining at night.

Poetaster - an inferior poet.

Psychrophilic - thriving at a relatively low temperature.

Quiddity - the essential nature or ultimate form of something: what makes something to be the type of thing that it is.

Repullulate - to bud or sprout again.

Retrogradation - a backward movement.

Semiustulate - half burnt or consumed by fire.

Tenebrific - causing gloom or darkness.

Unparadiz’d - brought from joy to miserie.