Jack keeps accidentally ruining Robby's relationships. And it's not like he means to! They're just never prepared for how present Jack is in Robby's life.
It isn't his fault that he arrives at Robby's after work only to find Katie- the current girlfriend of the seven week period- making pancakes and it isn't his fault that the first thing out of Jack’s mouth is "But there’s no lemon in the house." He's tired and his leg is killing him and there is no lemon in the house. Jack knows the contents of Robby's fridge better than his own at this point.
"Lemon?" Katie asks, looking confused and glancing between them. Jack supposes that maybe she didn't know that he came over after work if Robby had the day off.
"Yeah, lemon. Robby likes his pancakes with butter and lemon juice like an insane person." Jack points out. Surely she should know this by now. It's week five.
"I like it without, too!" Robby tries to insist, but Jack already is pulling up a delivery app so one can be obtained.
"No, you don't." It's a statement because he doesn't.
He's seen Robby turn down pancakes more than once if a restaurant doesn't have lemons. Jack’s seen him ask for some for his pancakes at hotel buffets and not even nice hotel buffets. The lovely people of the Holiday Inn Express in Dallas are still probably perplexed by the man who brought his own lemon juice on vacation, but Jack likes to be prepared and does not like listening to Robby whine while eating rubbery scrambled eggs two hours before Jack is set to give a presentation.
"Robby ate them with syrup last week." Katie insists and Jack actually laughs.
"She's got jokes!" Jack says, not realizing yet that he's stepped in it because he's tired and his leg hurts and he's not even sure why she's here- Robby never schedules his girlfriends to be here during Jack's mornings. Those are supposed to be dedicated bro-times.
He pays extra for an expedited delivery and tucks his phone back in his pocket, satisfied now that it's on it's way. When he looks up, he finds that Katie is looking dejected by the stove and Robby is glaring at him. The penny drops.
"You ate syrup?" Jack asks, much in the same way one would say 'you ate battery acid?'
"I eat syrup." Robby tries to save it, but it's utterly unconvincing. "The pancakes were really good, I swear." Somehow, that manages to sound even less convincing, which Jack has to marvel at.
He needs to prioritize a tactical exit.
"I'm gonna shower. My crutches still by your bed?" Katie's eyes are wide, her mouth open in shock, and Robby's turning a horrible puce color. A tactical exit is out the window, all that's left is a rapid, inglorious retreat. "I'll find them myself. 10 minutes until lemon."
By the time Jack's out of the shower, Katie is gone and next to the bowl of pancake batter is a single perfect lemon. Robby's huffy, but Jack knows that once he cooks the pancakes, slathers them in butter and a drizzle of juice with a delicate dusting of powdered sugar and fresh zest on top, Robby will have forgiven him. It really isn't Jack's fault, not at all when you think about it. She shouldn't have interrupted bro-time.


















